Better to Have Loved and Lost
by BuffyFanJMT
Summary: Post Chosen. After Spike's death during the battle, a grieving Buffy makes a wish that gives her the chance to change everything. But will it be for better or worse? Response to a Bloodshedverse Challenge. Rated to give me flexibility :D Please R&R!
1. Lost Love

Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my original character, whose name is yet to be revealed ;)

Summary: Post Chosen. After Spike's death during the battle against the First, a grieving Buffy makes a wish that gives her the chance to change everything. But will it be for better or worse?

A/N: I probably shouldn't have started another WIP considering that I've still got one in the works, but I saw a challenge on the Bloodshedverse and decided to take a crack at it. It's a response to Challenge #422 by dramionelurver. The idea intrigued me so until my writer's block for ANL decides to go away I thought I'd post this :)

I have ( tried ) to post this on the Bloodshedverse too, under my penname Tigerlass, but I'm not sure if it worked...

But anyway, here's chapter 1.

* * *

Chapter 1: Love Lost

Tick. Tick. Tick.

The sound of the ornate wooden clock on the mantle echoed, deafening in the silence. The movement of the hands counting the seconds were the only disturbance in the still room. Darkness prevailed, large drapes pulled closed over the window to block out the sunlight. The shadows were her sanctuary now. He couldn't go in the sun, so it wouldn't be fair for her to enjoy it. Especially now he was gone.

That had been the last time she'd seen the sun, when the golden rays had enveloped him in their warmth before using his body as a conduit to power the amulet. He'd been so beautiful, standing there as the light destroyed the cavern. Everything was collapsing around him and yet he'd still stood there, all because it was the right thing to do. He'd saved the world.

She'd looked at him, and she'd seen his soul. He glowed. And she was so proud of him.

Fresh tears sprung to the broken girl's eyes as they stared sightlessly ahead of her, stuck in the memory of watching her love burn. Her fingers absentmindedly tracing the scars on her left hand, her only reminder of the vampire, both the man and demon, that she'd loved more than she thought ever possible. It played over and over in her mind, each time it was slightly different as she found a way to get him out.

But sometimes it would play out the same, and each time another piece of her heart shattered. The same line slowly killing her. She could see him so clearly still, the way his sapphire eyes locked onto hers, the incredible sight of him in the sunlight, the warmth in their linked hands as they burst into flames.

"_I love you"_

"_No, you don't. But thanks for saying it"_

She thought they'd have time. After the battle, she was going to tell him. She just kept thinking, someday, she'd tell him. She never realised that she wouldn't get her someday. Joyce had hit him over the head with an axe, she'd dropped an organ on him, she'd staked him before stealing the Gem of Amara and letting him fry in the sunlight. He'd had the Initiative chip in his head, Glory had tortured him, and he'd suffered at her hand for years. He'd been in more fights than she could count just in the time she'd known him. But he'd survived. She'd begun to believe that he couldn't be killed.

And now he was gone. All burned to ashes and buried in the crater formerly known as Sunnydale.

It was 147 days today. 147 nights since he'd held her in his arms. 146 nights that she'd cried herself to sleep.

The gentle knock at the door wasn't enough to pull her out of her pain. Yet as deep as she was in her despair, her head was clear with the knowledge of one thing. The single reason for his death. The sobs wracked her thin frame as the same thoughts repeated through her mind.

_He's gone, and it's my fault. I killed him._

* * *

Willow knocked on Buffy's door and waited for an answer, raising her hand to knock again when she didn't receive one. Instead, he heard the sobs of the young blonde inside the room and didn't hesitate to push the door open and enter, closing it quietly behind her.

The redhead felt her eyes burn with unshed tears at the sight of the once strong Slayer. Her best friend used to be bubbly, energetic, bright... happy. The young woman in front of her was a pale imitation. She was too thin, her skin had lost most of the golden tone it usually had from staying in the dark, and it was obvious to anyone with eyes how much she was hurting.

"Oh, Buffy" she breathed, approaching the other girl quickly and settling on the bed beside her. Gently, Willow lay down on the bed next to her friends and embraced Buffy, feeling her shudder as she lost herself to the agony flooding through her.

She'd thought Buffy had been getting better. She'd been socialising with her friends, spending time with Dawn and training the other Slayers. Her eyes had betrayed the heavy grief of losing the blonde vampire but she had been holding up. _She hasn't been eating great, but I thought she was doing better. We've all been so blind._

"He's gone, Will. It's tearing me apart... I loved him, and... I killed him" Buffy cried, unable to stop the waves of sadness that swept over her.

"No, sweetie. He saved the world" Willow comforted her, keeping her voice soft and gently stroking the long blonde locks that hung limply around Buffy's face.

Cloudy green eyes looked up to meet the Willow's gaze. "Yes, I did. I could have saved him... done something different. He loved me, and he'd have found a way to get me out of there if it was the other way round. I should've... I should've..." Buffy choked on another sob, her voice as broken as she was.

"There's nothing you could've done, Buffy. You had to get out of there. He loved you too much to let you die like that"

Willow had been the only one Buffy had trusted to tell exactly what had happened down in the Hellmouth. It had felt too private to her, but she had needed to talk to someone during one of her weaker moments, like now. She had let everyone know that Spike was a hero, a true champion. The rest she'd kept to herself, sharing her secrets with the witch alone.

Buffy laughed humourlessly. "Yeah, well, if he didn't love me, then he wouldn't even have been there" She jumped up from the bed, staring down at Willow with a mixture of loss and self directed fury burning in her eyes. "He wouldn't have had to put up with half the crap he did! More than that!" She crumpled as the memory of his final moments ripped through her again. Willow caught her before she hit the floor, her legs giving way under the weight of all her emotions.

"God, I wish he'd never fallen in love with me" she whispered miserably. "Then he'd still be here. He'd be happy"

Willow didn't know how she could help Buffy, so she just kneeled next to her, wrapping her arms around the distraught blonde and rocking her slightly. "You don't mean that. Spike loved you, and you know he wouldn't want it any other way" She was oblivious to the tears slowly trailing down her own face. They all missed Spike, even Xander strangely enough. It was almost as if they were so used to having the bleached annoyance around that they had inevitably become fond of him. But they'd settled into a certain relationship of irritation and hate, not knowing how to break it, or even if they really wanted to. It was just how they were. It was... normal.

"God, Wills. It hurts so much. When Angel left, it was like I couldn't breathe. But this? I can't breathe, I can't think, my chest feels empty but it _aches_... It's like my heart's struggling to beat"

A kiss. A gunshot. The end of her world. _Tara, baby, I still miss you so much._ "I know, sweetie. I know"

* * *

The display in front of her made her heart ache to watch, the brunette's vision blurring with the tears that threatened to fall. This was the part of her calling that she hated. Seeing the pain of others, feeling it as if it were her own. But it was also the reason she had been chosen for this.

She smiled sadly at the petite blonde's words. She knew that pain intimately, and it was her job to help. Taking a deep breath, her beautiful feature twisted into the face of a demon. Yes, she knew exactly how to help. As the clock struck midnight, she touching the ruby red stone that hung around her neck and whispered one word.

"Done"

* * *

The last thing Buffy remembered was the meagre comforted Willow offered her in the embrace of her arms. The next, she was falling, deeper and deeper into the abyss. Clutching the redhead closer, she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to fight the dragging feeling, but it was too strong and she was too tired. Giving in, she let the darkness take over, and fell into the unknown.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for reading, and please leave a review to let me know what you think =)


	2. Back to the Before

For disclaimer and summary, please see chapter 1.

A/N: Sorry for the wait! One of the 'Must's of the challenge were that Buffy was sent back to Season 4 at some point, so it took a little while for me to get everything how I wanted it. I'm still not entirely sure if it meshes completely, but hopefully it works :)

Thanks to Linwe Ferland, mat528, Lorellei, shadow and Doni for your great reviews, you guys rock!

So, without further ado, here's the next chapter.

* * *

Chapter 2 : Back to the Before

"I can't bite anything. I can't even hit people"

The deep timbre of his voice reverberated in her ears as a sudden wave of dizziness swept over her. Buffy's hand flew to her head as she swayed on the spot, her other hand dropping the stake and grasping at air in an attempt to prevent her fall until she caught the doorframe. Confused and disorientated, she squeezed her eyes shut and pressed her palm harder against her head.

Giles grabbed her shoulders and steadied her as he looked over her in concern. "Buffy?"

Buffy shook her head, attempting to clear the fog that seemed to have enveloped her mind, but stopping when it caused pain to shoot through her head. Blinking hard she cleared her throat and put on a fake smile. "I'm fine, Giles. Now Spike, why don't you tell me exactly why we should give a soulless killer such as yourself an all access pass to my Watcher's house?"

Spike's eyes dropped to look at the floor as he searched for something that would convince them to let him inside. His head shot up as he remembered the one thing that might save him from the sun. "I've got information" he spoke rapidly, aware that it could be his only chance at reasoning his entrance to his last option for asylum. "About the soldier boys you were fighting. Got the inside scoop. Come on, what have you got to be afraid of?" a desperate note belying his nervousness and slight fear of being turned away. If they didn't help him, he didn't know where he'd go. Or how he'd survive.

Buffy closed her eyes and frowned, the throbbing pain in her head becoming more apparent as Spike talked. She lifted a hand and began rubbing small circles into one of her temples to try and alleviate some of the pain. She felt rather than saw Giles glance at her and she knew the unspoken question that would be there. She nodded slightly and moved back away from the door. Giles lifted the crossbow he held and aimed in directly at the vampire's chest.

Spike's eyes widened at the sight of the weapon and was about to turn and run when he heard Giles utter something hoped for but completely unexpected. "Come in, Spike"

The vampire in question stood there dumbly for a moment before quickly running into the house, stomping out the few of the flames that had begun to burn away at the brown fabric of his blanket. Giles kept his crossbow aimed for his heart and the vampire watched him warily, mistrust clearly shown in his eyes. "Perhaps we should tie him up?" suggested Giles. "Until we know for sure that he can't hurt us"

Buffy opened her eyes and gazed at her Watcher with a hint of disbelief. _He already said he can't hurt us, and I mean, why else would he be here? Spike's never exactly been known for his great plans. At look at him, he's clearly not at full strength. Besides, it's not like I couldn't take him, even if he was._

Giles sensed her doubt and continued. "It would stop him from escaping, and make all of us feel safer as well"

Spike scoffed at his first remark as Buffy thought along the same line. _Why would he try to escape after pleading to be let in?_ But Giles had made a good point, and he had rarely led her wrong before. Nodding hesitantly, Buffy pulled out a chair from the dining table.

"Giles?" Without having to hear another word, he went to his weapon chest and retrieved the rope he kept there, handing it to her silently and backing up.

"Sit" she commanded. Reluctantly, Spike approached her. She could see is muscles were tense, ready for flight, if not fight, and his eyes flickered about quickly as if searching for an easy exit. Taking his place in the wooden seat he glared up at the petite blonde as she began binding him to the chair with the rope. She met his gaze unwaveringly, though the burning hatred she could see in the blue depths sent a shiver of fear down her spine.

Hating himself even as he did so, Spike dropped his gaze from hers first. It was a sign of submission, something he hadn't subjected himself to in a long time, but he had to play nice if he was going to survive this. In his peripherals, he saw Buffy lift a hand to her head again, something he'd noticed she'd done a lot in the past few minutes.

Impulsively, he asked "You feelin' all right, luv?" _Why did I just ask her that? 'S not like I care._

"It's nothing, I'm fine" she snapped, taken off guard by his question. Buffy circled around him, securing the last section of rope and tying the knot a little firmer than was needed.

He growled as it pulled him against the chair tightly. "Bloody hell, woman. You're cuttin' off m' circulation"

"You don't have any circulation" she replied.

"Well, it pinches"

"Get used to it. I have more important things to worry about"

"I came to you in friendship" Buffy just looked at him, her eyebrows raised in speculation. "Well, all right, seething hatred" he amended. "But I've got useful information, and I feel I'm being mistreated"

"So tell me everything you know"

"I'm too hungry to remember everything"

_Remember everything. _Two simple words were the trigger. The pain she had felt in her head earlier exploded, waves of agony searing through her brain. Her hands shot up, clasping around her head in a protective position, as if she could ward of the pain with the gesture alone. She collapsed to her knees with a yell of pain.

* * *

At the sound of Buffy's cry, Giles ran in from the kitchen and Willow leapt up from the table where she was sat at, abandoning their tasks and kneeling immediately by the Slayer's side.

"Buffy? Buffy, what's wrong?" the redhead asked worriedly. The blonde hadn't made another noise since, apart from the occasional whimper as her body convulsed slightly.

Giles fixed his cold blue stare on the bleached blonde bound to the chair in front of him. "What did you do, Spike?"

"Oh, well you see, I managed to escape the Slayer, do something evil to her, then tie m'self back up so you wouldn't think it was me" he answered sarcastically.

"He didn't do anything, Giles. Buffy was just tying him up whilst they exchanged remarks in a pointless manner that suggests underlying sexual attraction" Anya piped up from her position of the arm of the sofa. "Perfectly innocent"

Nobody knew quite what to say to that. Except Xander. "Woah, woah, woah! Who said anything about sexual attraction? The Buffster's not attracted to Evil Dead over there"

"She's a red blooded woman, and look at him. He's gorgeous. Of course she's attracted to him"

"Thanks, pet" Spike smirked at Anya, who smiled brightly back and nodded.

"Ahn, he's a vampire. There's no way Buffy would be attracted to a vampire"

"Oh, so she _wasn't_ attracted to Angel?"

Willow sighed as Giles removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose, his eyes closed. Spike clenched his jaw at the mention of his grandsire but had the sense to stay quiet. Tuning out the argument between the brunette and his girlfriend, the three of them returned their focus to the blonde girl in front of them.

"That was different, Angel had a soul"

"A soul doesn't affect your actual appearance, Xander. It doesn't change whether you're physically attracted to them or not"

After a moment, the young witch had had enough. "Will you guys just shut up for a minute?" shouted Willow, her voice carrying loudly throughout the apartment. "In case you haven't noticed, something's happened to Buffy. Something seriously bad"

"What's wrong with her?" Xander tried to sit up, but Anya pushed him back down, telling him he needed to rest.

"Yeah, what's up with the Slayer?" Spike inquired curiously. He opened his mouth to explain about the headaches she appeared to have when he was cut off by the other Brit.

"It's none of your concern, Spike" Giles told him, his tone holding the warning behind his words. Spike's jaw snapped shut. _Don' rightly know why I was gonna help anyway._

The entire room seemed to freeze at the sound of a small groan from Buffy, her head still bowed. "Buffy?" Willow tried.

"Willow? What...?" She shook her head to try and clear her muddled mind but to no avail. She tried to stand, but her whole body felt heavy and slow. Unable to support herself and tired from everything, she let herself slump. Willow caught her, preventing her from hitting the floor. Slowly, she guided the Slayer to her feet.

"Buffy, are you okay? What happened?" she asked softly.

Buffy dared to open her eyes a fraction, shielding them immediately from the small amount of sunlight that came through the window. She had isolated herself for several days, welcoming the darkness like a lover's embrace, so even the insignificant amount was enough to practically blind her. Blinking dazedly, she turned her gaze to Giles, frowning as he watched her with worried eyes. "Giles, where... am... I?" she asked, her question losing volume as she glanced around and all her senses rapidly suddenly returned to her. Dizziness returned with the recognition of her surroundings, but she managed to stay on her feet. _How did I get to Giles' apartment? Sunnydale's long gone, along with... him, my vampire._

Buffy unknowingly spoke aloud as she tried to sort her thoughts and figure out what had happened. "We were talking about Sunnydale, and... him. Then I was crying..." she trailed off as her eyes became unfocused. "Then there was darkness. I'm not sure what it was, but it was pulling and pulling. I wasn't strong enough to fight it. I..." Buffy finally looked up at Willow and gasped. Her mouth opened and closed soundlessly a few times.

"What?" Willow turned defensive at the blonde's look. "Do I have something in my teeth?"

Buffy's head whipped around, taking everything in. Her green eyes swung swiftly round the room, stopping on the dark haired girl sat on the sofa. "Anya" she whispered. _But how is that possible?_

"Is she gonna be okay?"

Buffy whirled around at the sound of _his_ voice, retreating until her back hit the sofa. Leaning against it, Buffy closed and opened her eyes a few times, waiting for the illusion to fade. Until she heard his voice again. It was so much clearer this time. _Spike?_ She lifted her head and gradually brought her gaze up to her in the direction of the sound she'd heard so often and yet missed so much. _"No, you don't. But thanks for saying it"_

"'Cos I think I can eat someone if they're already dead" he continued, eyeing her hungrily.

When she looked up and locked her eyes with his deep azure orbs, she chocked back a sob and clapped a hand over her mouth. She didn't drop his gaze as her own filled with tears. Blinking them back, she moved her hand and let her eyes travel over his form, relearning all his features. The platinum blonde of his hair, his dark eyebrows and the scar across his left, his piercing blue eyes, sharp cheekbones and full mouth. _God, my memory didn't do him justice _she thought in wonder.

"I'm dreaming" Buffy stated, closing her eyes tightly. "I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming..." she repeated, hopelessness and sadness permeating her tone.

"Uh, Buffy? You're not dreaming" Willow assured her, wrapping an arm hesitantly around her shoulders.

Buffy's eyes flew open as she turned accusing eyes to the redhead. "Willow, what did you do?"

Willow stared at her with innocence. She'd been good, no spells cast to go wonky or anything. "Me? Nothing" Buffy frowned and shut her eyes briefly once more.

"What just happened?" Giles asked Buffy worriedly.

Buffy looked about, noticing the strange looks everyone had. "I don't know, but it can wait"

"Buffy, you collapsed in pain. I'd say that was a more pressing issue"

_Is Giles always this condescending? I know he cares, but jeez, I think that out of all people, I'd know how 'pressing' it is._ "Right now, I have more important things to worry about" However, she could see Giles was unconvinced. "I'm fine. See, peachy with a side of keen" she added with another fake smile. It had been something she'd become accustomed to do since her resurrection. Now it was almost more natural than actually smiling. She looked askance at Spike, watching him as discreetly as she could. He'd always been the only one who could see right through her. See her.

Giles and Willow both watched her for a moment, clearly seeing that everything was not as fine as she said but willing to allow the fact that she could deal with it herself if she felt like she could. If she needed help, she'd ask. Giles stepped back a few paces and Willow nodded, returning to the small table where she had left her books.

Once Buffy saw that they had accepted her poor explanation, she turned to see Xander lying ill on the sofa and a brunette Anya who was kneeling next to him, gently running her fingers through his hair. All these aspects slowly registered in her consciousness. _Wait, I remember this... Why do I remember this? _Looking up, she reassessed Spike's condition. He clearly hadn't been feeding recently. His skin was paler, his body thinner and his trademark black t-shirt almost drowning him instead of the tight fit it usually had. His face looked gaunter and there were dark rings around his tired eyes. Then it hit her. The memory of him begging to be let in surged to the forefront of her mind with startling clarity. _This was the day we found out about his chip._

She hadn't even noticed Anya had moved until she heard her voice call through from the kitchen. "Uh, how much butter goes in with these?"

She faced Anya as she poked her head around the corner of the archway into the kitchen. Her eyes wondered to the table as she tried to piece everything together. Then it clicked. "Thanksgiving!" she blurted out, turning to Spike in realisation.

"Yeah, what of it?" he asked, looking at her like she'd grown a second head.

"That means the Native American spirits are here"

"Uh, yeah, that's why I'm researching about Hus and the mission" Willow said, her brows furrowed in confusion as she lifted one of the books in front of her. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah" she replied, a little uncertain. "Yeah, I'm fine" she added, her voice more firm and nodding to her friend with a small smile.

"Buffy?" Anya called.

"Oh, uh, about half a stick and a quarter cup of brandy" she answered almost automatically. _Wow, that was weird. It's like there's two 'me's. I know I don't remember what was in that recipe._

Anya nodded and looked to Giles. "Where's your brandy?"

"What? Oh, yes. On the bookcase" he pointed to the bookcase distractedly.

"I wouldn't say no to a brandy" Spike declared loudly from his bound position.

"What's wrong?" Buffy asked, though her attention still focused inwardly as she thought through what had happened. _We were talking, and I was crying... What did I say? I was blaming myself for his death, and that he only put up with everything and died because he loved me. I just... wished he never loved me _she thought slowly, her fear beginning to grow as she realised her mistake. _Oh God, what have I done?_

"The victims. Apart from Xander, Hus has targeted authority figures. Father Gabriel, the curator of the cultural centre. Who else fits this pattern?"

"Just a small brandy" added the vampire.

The sound of Giles' and Spike's voice pulled Buffy back to the present, _or the past...or... Mmmrugh, this is far too complicated for me already_. "Me" she whispered, not noticing Spike's blue gave fixing intently on her.

_Okay, Buffy. Think. Hus came here with his spirit army. But how did you beat him?_ "Will, anything in those books about how to stop a Native American spirit guy? Some nice, non-judgmental way to, you know, kill him?"

Willow grabbed the few books in front of her and held them protectively as she stood. "I'm not gonna help you kill him. I'm not on board"

"What choice do we have?"

"Buffy, this isn't a western. We're not at Fort...Giles with the cavalry coming to save us. It's one lonely guy. Oppressed warrior guy who's just trying to..."

"Kill a lot of people?"

"I didn't say he was right" she grumbled.

"Will, you know how bad I feel about this" _But Hus is coming here, and he needs to be stopped. _"But even though it's hard, we have to end this. Yes, he's been wronged, and I personally would be ready to apologize – "

"Oh, someone put a stake in me" Spike pleaded sardonically.

"You got a lot of volunteers in here" Xander's voice reached him from his prone form hidden by the back of the sofa.

"I just can't take all this mamby-pamby boo-hooing about the bloody Indians" he retorted, rolling his eyes in irritation.

"Uh, the preferred term – " Spike interrupted her before Willow could correct him.

"You won. All right? You came in and you killed them and you took their land. That's what conquering nations do. It's what Caesar did, and he's not going around saying, 'I came, I conquered, I felt really bad about it.'" he mocked them before continuing seriously. "The history of the world isn't people making friends. You had better weapons, and you massacred them. End of story" Having made his point, he glanced away uninterestedly, but his attention was caught as Willow spoke again.

"If we could talk to him – "

_Why aren't they gettin' it? Are they really that stupid? _"You exterminated his race. What could you possibly say that would make him feel better? It's kill or be killed here. Take your bloody pick"

Everyone fell silent as they considered Spike's point. "Maybe it's the syphilis talking, but... Some of that made sense"

"I made these points earlier, but fine, no one listens to me" Giles muttered under his breath, annoyed that the vampire had been listened to instead of him.

"He's right" Buffy said.

"Now listen here, Slayer, I... Wait a minute. I am?" he asked, a puzzled expression passing across his features.

Buffy smiled softly at him and nodded. "You are"

Leaving a bewildered Spike behind her, she entered the kitchen to help Anya prepare the Thanksgiving meal. _Wow, way to drop me from one crisis to the next_ she thought in exasperation. Still, it wasn't exactly unusual in her world as the Slayer. Sighing, she picked up a spoon. _Between the possibility of beingthrown into the past by a wish made by mistake and pie, I choose pie._

* * *

The next half an hour saw Buffy flitting about the kitchen in a rush to finish preparations. She practically vibrated with nervous energy, tense and on edge with the knowledge of the upcoming battle. Grabbing enough cutlery for everyone, she made her way back through to Giles' dining table and began setting places.

"Hey, when am I gonna get fed?" asked an aggravating Spike as he fidgeted against the rope holding him.

"Later" replied Giles.

"You know what happens to vampires that don't get to feed?"

"I always wondered about that actually"

"Living skeletons, mate. Like famine pictures from those dusty countries, only not half as funny" he replied with a shadow of hide usual smirk.

Buffy looked up as he spoke and felt sympathy, love and sadness fill her. God she'd missed him so much, it still felt unreal to see him before her. At the time, she had noticed his appearance, but hadn't cared. Now it hurt her heart to see him so weak. She walked round so that she was stood in front of him with her hips cocked and her hands on her waist. She folded her arms over her chest, eyeing him critically. Fidgeting uncomfortably under her intent look, Spike frowned. "What?" he demanded in irritation. Everything about the other blonde had unnerved him since her 'episode' that had caused her to collapse earlier. The others had thought it had been nothing to worry about, the Slayer had said so herself, telling them that she was fine. But she seemed... different somehow, even if they couldn't see it. Her behaviour just now had only added to the growing unease he felt in her presence.

Buffy knelt down to look him in the eyes, ignorant to the others around her and they looks she was receiving. "How long has it been since you last fed?"

Her quiet question took him by surprise, not that he should have been. After agreeing with him earlier, it appeared that she was just full of them today. He searched her face for some kind of hint at deception, but found only honesty, pain and... compassion? He kept his eyes locked on her green ones, feeling as though he could get lost in their depths. There was something else there too, something he didn't dare give a name to.

Blinking a little as he came back to himself, he answered her. "Uh, 'm not sure really. Last lot o' blood I 'ad came from the soldier boys God knows how long before I escaped. So..." he trailed of and shrugged as best he could whilst in his current predicament.

Buffy frowned. She hadn't bothered to ask before, had deemed it to be unnecessary information, but she'd had no idea it had been that long. _He must literally be starving._ "Okay, well I don't think the butcher's are open now and even if they were, I don't really have time to go get any blood. But I can get some later. You gonna be okay 'til then?"

She was met by Spike's disbelieving gaze. "Really?" he asked incredulously.

Buffy nodded and smiled warmly at him. His eyes didn't lose any of their scepticism but he nodded back a little. Standing, she placed a gentle hand on his shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly. Before he had time to register the gesture, the sound of an arrow pierced the air.

* * *

A/N: As you probably all know, a lot of this chapter's events and dialogue were taken from episode 8 of season 4, Pangs. I just tweaked it a little, because obviously the circumstances are a bit different in this story :D

So, thanks for reading and please review to let me know what you think!


	3. The Trouble With Thanksgiving

For disclaimer and summary, please see chapter 1.

A/N: To all the wonderful reviewers, thank you! Linwe Ferland, Doni, WhiteInfinity21 and Naeara, you guys rock as always!

* * *

Chapter 3 : The Trouble With Thanksgiving

The arrow hit the small decorative scarecrow in the centre of the table, the sudden sound splitting the air with a whistle and thud. Buffy's head shot up as Willow and Anya screamed. Hus was in the window with a bow, reaching behind his back to retrieve another arrow.

"You. Listen, maybe I wasn't clear before about how terrible we all feel. 'Cause we're trying to help" Buffy tried even as the redhead and brunette fell to the floor, dragging Xander out of the way of the oncoming onslaught.

"What's going on?" asked Spike, fear that he was unaccustomed to feeling beginning to build inside his chest.

"It isn't working" Giles stated.

Buffy had to fight the urge to roll her eyes at the obvious comment. Undeterred, she tried again. "Uh, you can have casinos now" she shouted. _Okay, even I know that was lame._

"Get down!" Giles exclaimed, grabbing her arm and pulling her into a crouch between the table and sofa where the others had hidden. Just as they ducked, a rain of arrows came shooting through the window.

Spike glanced at the others, wanting to communicate his need for help without directly asking for it. _'Ve lowered m'self enough already by askin' the Slayer for help. I won' do it again. _"What about me? You gonna leave me here like this?"

An arrow came soaring through and pierced his chest just inches away from dusting him. "Hey! Watch the heart!"

At the sight of the arrow so close to his heart, Buffy felt her own jump into her throat. She fought the urge to jump up and pull him to safety, clinging to the knowledge that he hadn't perished in this particular battle. _I can't change anything. Not yet. Not until I know more. _Yet she felt fear and anger burn deep within her nonetheless. "Giles, where's your weapons chest?"

"Over there" He pointed across the room to the chest. Buffy glanced about, gauging her best route towards the chest. After a moment, she sidled across and reached out to attempt to pull the chest closer. She cried out as an arrow struck her in the arm, pulling it back quickly, luckily pulling the chest as well.

"Buffy!" a chorus of shouts came from the people beside her as she turned back to rest backwards against the sofa.

Spike glanced down at the three arrows that had embedded themselves in his body, then began trying once more to bounce the chair he was tied to out of the firing line. "Remember that conquering nation thing? Forget it. Apologize"

Buffy gritted her teeth and pulled the arrow out of her arm. "Shut up, Spike" she replied, though there was no malice behind it.

"Fine, I'll do it myself" Spike retorted, her tone of voice not sinking in. He turned to the spirit leading the attack and started yelling frantically. "Hey, sorry! Sorry about that, chief!"

"How many?" Buffy asked.

Giles peeked just above the sofa and did a quick count. "Uh, the leader upstairs. 2 by the living room windows. Uh, one through the window by the door" he replied.

"It's too many"

"We can help" offered Anya.

Buffy opened her mouth to protest but looked at Anya for a second and determined that she was sincere. Willow was even giving her the infamous 'resolve face'. The blonde glanced at Xander but saw that he too was readying himself for a fight. She smiled at the four people in front of her and nodded.

"Okay, get ready" She opened the chest and grabbed three crossbows, handing one to Giles. Anya reached for the other before Buffy could decide who to give the last to. Smiling at the ex-vengeance demon, she nodded and turned to face the spirit in the window. "On my count. One... two... three!" Simultaneously, they kneeled up and fired.

The warriors were too fast though, easily evading the arrows. Suddenly, a loud crash announced the arrival of one of the spirits as they smashed through an upstairs window.

_C'mon Buffy. Think, think, think._ Deciding on a plan of action, she turned to the others. "You three head outside and deal with the ones in the courtyard. Giles, you're with me"

Each of them nodded their agreement and Buffy ran forward to meet the one from upstairs as Giles met the one in the living area and the others ran for the front door.

* * *

Xander immediately grabbed a flower pot and cracked it over the head of the nearest warrior.

"Stop them" demanded Hus.

Hearing the attack, another warrior obeyed and jumped down from the upper level, landing in front of Anya and Willow. The girls turned and retreated back to the opposite wall, each grabbed shovels swinging them round to hit the Indian, cornering him and bringing their weapons down on him repeatedly. Seeing his friend and girlfriend in trouble, Xander grabbed another shovel. Raising it above his head to strike the Indian, he was shocked when it was suddenly ripped out of his grasp.

Spinning around, he faced the spirit he had hit with the flower pot. "Hey!" he exclaimed, glancing at the shovel that the enemy now held. Without thinking first, he rushed the warrior, pushing him against the wall. The Indian grabbed the young man's collar and, with no time to react, Xander closed his eyes and braced for impact as he was thrown backwards, stumbling through the front door and back into the apartment. He felt dizzy and could feel his meagre strength waning from the efforts of fighting both physically and against the various diseases he had been subject to all day.

Luckily, he saw the knife's descent before it was too late and grabbed his attacker's wrist in both hands. This unfortunately still left the warrior's other hand free and no way to defend himself. The Indian's punch landed squarely on his jaw, causing pain to shoot through his face.

"Why... won't... you... die?" exclaimed Willow as she and Anya continued to beat the spirit. Willow tightened her grip on her weapon and swung it, hitting the Indian with surprising force in a vicious blow, knocking him unconscious. Breathing heavily, the two girls looked down at the fallen warrior for a moment.

"You've managed to kill one of the lonely oppressed warrior people. Well done" Anya congratulated her with a smile.

"But... I didn't..." Willow stuttered, staring at the shovel in her hands.

"There are still more inside. We should go" Anya ran to the door of the apartment, quickly followed by the saddened but resolute redhead.

* * *

Buffy met the Indian near the staircase, dodging him as he swiped at her with his knife and grabbing his wrist. She landed a swift kick to the back of his legs, knocking him to his knees without releasing his arm. Another powerful blow, this time to his back, sent the spirit sprawling against the wall. Buffy drew up her leg, preparing to kick him again, but he recovered quickly, rolling out of the way so her foot meeting nothing but the wall.

Giles bravely fought against one of the other warriors, but his punch was blocked as another Indian crashed through his window and into his living room. Bringing back his mace, ready to swing, he was taken off guard as one of them tackled him to the floor.

* * *

"Ow! Bloody hell" Spike grumbled as another arrow hit him, lodging itself in his thigh. Buffy cast a quick glance in his direction, sighing inaudibly in relief when she saw he was, for the most part, unhurt.

Her distraction almost allowed her opponent to gain the upper hand, but she just managed to counter his kick. Retreating quickly, she evaded his further attacks with his knife. Seeing her opening, she grabbed his arm and hauled him over the back of the sofa, throwing him into it. Using her advantage, she grabbed the nearest weapon and thrust it into his heart.

Unfazed, Hus slashed upwards, cutting her upper arm deeply. Crying out, she stumbled back a little in surprise. Placing a hand over her wound, she looked to Giles. She opened her mouth to warn him, to ask him how to kill them, when her eye lit upon the knife he held. _"You're knife can kill you"._ She remembered the words she had spoken years ago... or today... or she would've done... shaking her head with a frown she looked back up at the warrior in front of her.

Her Watcher wasn't faring as well. The one that had tackled him hauled him up from the floor and pinned him to the wall, his hands around the older man's throat. Gasping for breath, Giles gathered strength enough to lift his knee and force the Indian away from him, causing his grip to loosen. Taking his opportunity, he punched the warrior and landing a solid hit. They traded punches until the spirit surprised him with a kick, the unexpected move getting under his guard and sending him to the floor again. The Indian grabbed his weapon and pulled it against the man's neck, cutting off his oxygen supply. Giles' hands instinctively went to the weapon, attempting to pull it away from his throat. Gaining the purchase he needed, he pushed the warrior backwards, landing on top of him as they continued to brawl.

* * *

The warrior Buffy had engaged jumped up from the sofa, climbing onto the back of it and leaping off, aiming a kick for her head. Ducking in the nick of time, Buffy stepped back. She blocked is next two punches before spinning and punching his chest, then lifted her arms to block his retaliation. Grabbing his arm for a third time, she threw him into the wall. Grabbing a chair from the dining table, she pinned him against the wall, countering his punches and landing her own, unaware of the warrior rising behind her, preparing to strike.

"Slayer, behind you" called Spike.

Whirling around at his warning, she saw the warrior behind her. She picked up the knife she had used to stab Hus, throwing it with perfect precision. It stabbed him in the heart, the force of it thudding into his chest knocking him down from his perch on the sofa. _So it won't kill him, but at least it'll slow him down._ Turning back to Hus, she grabbed the knife he held in his hand.

* * *

Xander threw a punch at the Indian pinning him to the floor, catching him of guard and reversing their positions. Aware of his vulnerable position, the warrior immediately searched for the leverage to change his luck. Finding it, he surged upwards, throwing Xander against the wall and knocking over several objects. Willow and Anya ran in just as the warrior wrapped his hands around Xander's throat. Wielding their weapons, they charged, bashing him with all their might. The warrior from outside seemed to have recovered, as he soon rejoined the battle. Willow turned to meet him, hitting him with all her strength, keeping him at bay and away from her.

Giles had lost his grip on the Indian he faced a while back, but had valiantly fought back. That was, until the warrior grabbed his shoulders and began to throw him against the wall so hard his head hit it with a resounding thud. His vision began to blur, the pain in his head almost enough to make him pass out, but he held on. He had to.

* * *

Glancing down at the knife she held in her hand, then looking up again, she locked eyes with the spirit leader Hus. She saw the pain, the torment, the rage and the vengeance in them. Yet she could feel sympathy welling up inside her. He hadn't asked for any of this, neither had his people. But she knew what had to be done. She wasn't the Slayer for no reason.

"I'm sorry" she whispered sincerely. She drew back her arm but hesitated.

Hus noticed and pushed against the chair that held him pinned and knocking the knife from her hand. He twisted away from the blonde and grabbed a knife from the table, holding it in front of him as if to warn her off.

Quickly, Buffy regrouped and grabbed the knife she had dropped. Advancing on him, she saw Spike out the corner of her eye trying to bounce his chair further away from the fight. In his panic to get away from the potentially dangerous situation, he rocked it too far and yelled as the chair tipped backwards, falling to the floor and taking him with it.

Attempting to ignore him, Buffy kept up with the fight. Hus was a fairly challenging adversary, which surprised her. At the time, yes, he had been tough to beat. But she technically had all her knowledge of fighting techniques from the future. As she swung for him and he dodged, causing her to only cut his arm, she realised with dismay that, although it seemed she had been sent to the past with her memories, her strength and speed were only that of her past self. Steeling herself, she became even more determined to win. Knowing what came next, she struck before he could change. He seemed stunned that she had managed to hurt him, and in his shock, he had left himself wide open. Moving as fast as she could, Buffy plunged the knife she had acquired from him into his heart.

He bellowed out with agony and anger. He had failed. Looking down at the knife in his chest, he gradually raised his eyes back to Buffy. At least he had fallen to a worthy warrior. Now, he was free. Slowly, the spirits of the Chumash tribe dissolved into green mist that dissipated rapidly, fading into the ether.

* * *

Giles pulled himself up to his feet from his prone position on the floor, glancing about as Xander did the same. Willow and Anya stumbled slightly, catching themselves before they fell as the warriors they were facing faded as well.

The four humans were panting as they tried to catch their breath, watching Buffy as she moved to the table. She solemnly placed the knife she had used to kill Hus on the table and looked up to her friends. They all walked forward, gathering around the table and finally taking in the damage the Thanksgiving battle had resulted in.

"We did it guys" she said quietly, her voice sounding sad rather than victorious.

"What happened? Did we win?" came the deep British voice from the vampire lying helplessly on the floor.

Buffy grinned and it broke the tension in the room. "Yeah, Spike. We won"

She walked around the sofa and bent down to grasp the back of the chair. Grunting a little with the effort, she lifted the chair back up onto all four of its legs. She was about to ask him if he was okay but caught herself just in time. "Is everyone okay?" she asked generally instead. Giles put a hand to his head and rubbed it, but nodded it slightly to indicate he was fine. Willow, Anya and Xander all nodded too. Buffy noticed that Spike didn't say anything.

"You okay, Spike?" she questioned, keeping her eyes averted from everyone's gazes. She could feel the confused looks of her friends and Watcher boring into her back. She peeked up at Spike through her lashes to see him watching her with a strange look. When he noticed her watching him, she could see him change visibly, the cocky and irritating demeanour he usually presented firmly back in place.

Giving the arrows stuck in his body a look, he raised an eyebrow and looked back at the petite girl. "Yeah, 'm just fine" he replied, sarcasm heavy in his tone.

Rolling her eyes, she shook her head and reached out to grab the head of the arrow through his shoulder. "Ready?"

Spike glanced down at her hands grasping the arrow tightly. He sighed and clenched his jaw and closed his eyes, giving her a tight nod.

"On three. One..." She yanked the arrow forcefully, pulling it entirely through his shoulder. Spike roared, the pain practically overwhelming and threatening to claim his consciousness. The smell of his own blood had his demon struggling to the surface in his hunger. Still, he fought the urge both to change to his vampiric visage and to pass out.

"How'd I know you were gonna do that?" he ground out.

Opening his eyes wearily, he watched dispassionately as Buffy worked quickly to remove the other three arrows that had hit him, the pain nothing compared to the first one. _Is that why she did it that way?_ He wondered.

The blonde looked up once she had finished in time to see his eyes opened fractionally, his clouded blue eyes flecked with gold under his heavy lids. She watched as he shook his head and forced his eyes open fully, this time, the fully blue orbs clear and alert. Smiling softly at him, she stood and grabbed his chair once more, pulling it into place at the table. She noticed as she did that someone had cleared the table of any destruction, replaced the missing cutlery and moved the chairs back into position. Giles called Buffy from the kitchen and, casting another smile at the confused vampire, she went to her Watcher's side.

"Why don't you guys sit down? We can take it from here" Buffy said, giving the redhead and two brunettes a reassuring smile. Nodding in agreement, the three of them left the kitchen.

Seeing that Spike had already been moved into one of the positions, Xander quickly scanned the other seats. Grasping Anya's arm, he pulled her to the two seats opposite him. "Let's sit here, Anya"

Anya frowned but shrugged and sat in the seat her boyfriend pointed to. Willow gave him a desperate look. He may be safe, but Spike still scared her a little. The perceptive bleach blonde saw the interaction and growled under his breath. _God, they're pathetic._ "Don't worry, Red, I won't bite you. Can't, remember?" he said resentfully.

Giving him an uncertain smile, the witch shuffled towards the chair next to him and taking her seat. Everyone kept their eyes on their plates, waiting in uncomfortable silence for dinner to be served. In a flurry of movement, Buffy and Giles carried in all the dishes that had been prepared throughout the day. Xander clapped his hands together and grinned. "Now this is what I'm talking about! All looks good, Buff"

Buffy smiled at her friends as she and her Watcher took their seats at either end of the table. Bowing their heads, they all said a quick grace before Giles stood and took the responsibility of carving the turkey. After a few minutes, everyone was helping themselves to the turkey, mash potatoes and various vegetables.

* * *

An awkward silence had filled the room, pierced only by the scraping of cutlery on plates and the odd polite question to pass items. Each person was acutely aware of the extra 'guest', though for different reasons. Nervousness, fear, uneasiness, hate, curiosity and love filled the five other occupants at the table in regards to the vampire who, amazingly, also had yet to say a word. Finally, Willow had had enough, and had to break the quiet.

"I feel lousy" muttered Willow. _Okay, maybe not the best way to start a conversation, but it's true._

"Mm, turkey came out rather splendidly" Giles mumbled around his mouthful of said turkey.

"Oh! It was yummy" the redhead agreed quickly. Her expression fell again as she continued to explain. "It's just... Did you see me? Two seconds of conflict with an indigenous person and I turn into General Custer"

"Violence does that. Instinct takes over" Giles assured her, trying to comfort her.

"Yeah, that's the fun" Spike interrupted dryly.

Xander paused and looked up at the bound blonde. "Nobody asked you"

Buffy had to bite her tongue from retorting to her friend in defence of the man she loved. It seemed she didn't need to though, as Spike spoke again. "Oh, lay off. You all had a fine meal. But me... an entire siege. You'd think one of you would bleed a little" Surreptitiously, he glanced at the wound on Buffy's arm that had recently been bandaged. The scent of Slayer blood was heavy on the air, driving him crazy, tempting him.

"I'll get you some blood tomorrow. I promise" Buffy whispered almost silently, knowing that whilst no one else would hear her, the vampire would. She saw his head lift slightly and tilt towards her in interest. She nodded imperceptibly, but he caught it, nodding slightly back in stunned thanks.

"Good work, Buffy. On both counts" Giles praised his ward, smiling fondly at her as he felt fatherly pride fill his chest.

"Thanks" she replied, returning his smile.

"Well, you know, you should be pleased" he added.

Buffy nodded. "Wasn't exactly perfect, but it was my first thanksgiving on my own and we all got through it" She glanced around when she realised she'd used the past tense, but no one seemed to suspect that she meant anything different to the day being done.

Xander placed his hand on Anya's back and rubbed it in a supposedly suggestive manner. "And you know what? I think my syphilis is clearing right up"

Buffy grimaced. "And they say romance is dead" Her eyes flicked quickly to the man to her left, a secret smile curving her lips a little. "Or maybe the just wish it" she added, turning to Willow and shrugging her shoulders.

"Well, maybe we started a new tradition this year" Everyone looked up and stared disbelievingly at Willow. "Maybe not" she conceded. "But at least we all worked together. It was like old times" she said with a small smile, her voice becoming softer in remembrance.

"Yeah, especially with Angel being here and everything" Xander added flippantly. Five heads shot up at Xander's slip and looked to the blonde at the head of the table.

"And?" Buffy asked, unconcerned. At their looks she realised that she wasn't supposed to know. _Crap, I didn't know he was here last time._ Putting on a fake grin she came up with the best reasoning she could, even as she knew it _had_ in fact been at least a little true at the time, even if she hadn't recognised his signature for what it was. "C'mon, guys. I'm the Slayer. You really think a 250 year old master vampire can stalk me and I won't know about it? Spidey sense, remember?" she waved a hand dismissively and shrugged, returning to her meal.

"Well, it's just... we thought you'd be a little wigged, what with it being Angel and all" Xander said cautiously. As far as he knew it was still a sensitive subject for her.

"Xander, he left. That was his decision. I'm over it" she shrugged again. "Just wish he'd stop with whole stalker routine and I-know-better-than-you attitude" she grumbled quietly. No one caught her last comment except for Spike, who grinned but kept his eyes down.

"What's so funny, Dead Boy Junior?"

"Nothin'" Spike replied, though his amusement was clear in his tone to anyone listening for it.

"Good" stated the brunette boy, glaring across the table at him.

Silence reigned again, broken occasionally by idle chat between the small and unusual group, until eventually everyone had cleared their plates.

* * *

Buffy stood and cleared away some of the plates, balancing them on her arm and carrying them precariously towards the kitchen. "See? Slayer co-ordination really does help around the home" she quipped, receiving a few grins in return.

Placing them down on the surface next to the sink, she sighed and ran a hand through. _Don't panic. Don't panic. So, you're stuck in the past, it's not the end of the world. Yet, anyway._

She didn't know how she was going to deal with this. Everything was hard enough the first time around, how was she going to go through it all again? She froze and lifted her head, staring at the tiles with unfocused eyes. _Okay, so assuming this is the real deal..._ she glanced down at the cut on her arm. _And by the feel of things, it is, I could change everything, make things better. I can save Mom._ She gasped, grasping the edge of the counter to steady herself as the idea of saving another person finally fully registered. _I can save Spike._

_But how?_ Asked a small uncertain part of her.

_By stopping him from falling in love with me. That was the point of my wish after all._

_No! I can just make sure I pull him out of the cavern. Or wear the amulet myself._

_Think about it though. If I stop him from falling for me, he'd never fight for his soul. So he couldn't wear the amulet._

_But who am I to change that? Maybe he was destined to get the soul? It's not for me to decide whether he should have it returned to him or not. It was his choice before, and it should be his choice this time._

_What I really need is to talk to whoever granted my wish. Find out if it's safe to use my knowledge of the future or not. After all, there's gotta be a reason right? If sending me back was gonna mess up everything, the Powers That Be or whatever wouldn't have allowed it._

_And what about everything else? What about Dawn, Glory, Tara, Willow's magic, Xander and Anya's wedding, my death. How much can I change without screwing everything up?_

Absentmindedly, Buffy began washing the dishes slowly as she pondered how she could find the one who had brought her here. Or whatever they'd done. Then it hit her. _Anya. I can ask her about vengeance demons and any other wish granting beings. Of all of us, she'd know. But how do I get her on her own, and how much do I tell her?_

* * *

A/N: I tweaked Pangs a little bit with Buffy's knowledge of the battle and all. I really wanted to fit the bear in, cos I thought Spike's reaction was hilarious XD but I just couldn't fit it in without it not making sense, though I think this works =)

Also, I'm English and therefore have never had Thanksgiving. The few things I did find were from the ever popular Wiki lol. So I kept it down to a minimum to reduce the chance of getting something wrong, and I hope I did okay =)

Last point, I kinda took out Angel. One of the 'must's of the challenge is that Buffy doesn't go to L.A. so I thought it would be easier to just skip him altogether. Besides, in the episode, I figure he only knew where the warrior spirits were headed because of the clue he got from the Scoobies, but seeing as Buffy knew she was the target and not the Dean, she never sent them out, therefore, Angel never got the tip. If that makes sense. It's my kinda logic =) lol

So, thank you for reading! I think you know what I'm going to ask now though. Please review? :D


	4. Finding the Wish Granter

For disclaimer and summary, please see chapter 1.

A/N: I know this is repetitous, but at the risk of sounding boring, I have to thank my reviewers. You inspire me to write more and post faster =) Carol, ArTeMuS09 and Naeara, you guys are awesome as always!

Naeara: In answer to your question, you're about to meet the VD responsible for our little trip back in time :D

Oh, yeah. I do own her. Other than that it all belongs to the great Joss Whedon and the wonderful people at ME, as well as any others that I forgot who still, unfortunately, aren't me lol.

* * *

Chapter 4: Finding the Wish Granter

"I am unimpressed, Kimardi. This is not what the girl wished for"

Kimardi shuffled her feet slightly but refused to look away. "Not exactly. But I think it can work"

"My dear, she wished that he didn't fall in love with her. Now, I know I allow you a certain amount of interpretation, but this is unacceptable. This is what I expected" D'Hoffryn placed his palms together, slowly pulling them apart again to create a small screen.

* * *

Chaos reigned on Earth, the sky darkened with black clouds. Blue flashes of lightening lit up the dreary landscape. Demons dominated the world, their deafening roars filling the air. One woman stood in the midst, on a hill overlooking the area that was once Sunnydale. She held a red, chrome and wood axe firmly in her hands, her eyes hard and cold and her dull brown hair whipping around her face in the harsh wind.

Once surrounded by friends and family, she now stood alone, as Watcher's have told Slayer's since the beginning of time. _She alone will stand against the forces of darkness._ Everything had begun to fall apart the moment Drusilla came back to town. Spike hadn't hesitated before accepting her offer and taking back his dark princess. What had happened to the couple since then, she didn't know. She didn't care. She hadn't cared about anything for a long time.

Her mother taken by a tumour, her sister drained dry by a hell God, her Watcher and friends killed off one by one by the demons that had spilled through the portal. She had watched, unable to save everyone, as the world fell prey to the beings she had fought so hard to protect it from.

Now she worked alone, killing each demon she faced, as she would do until the end of her time. Only her death will ever set her free.

* * *

"That is the world that was meant to be created by the wish she made" D'Hoffryn let his hands drop, the screen dissipating.

"But, D'Hoffryn, think about the potential this has" she argued. _This has to work. They deserve this second chance._

"You gave her past self the memories she had of the future! Do you not realise how damaging this is? How did you even interpret her wish to mean this?"

"I gave her... visions, if you will, of the future and what it holds to her past self before the vampire ever fell in love with her. This is the moment that the foundations of his love were truly built. Without the chip, he'd never have gotten close enough"

"I still don't see your point, Kimardi"

"They can have a second chance. Either she can choose to let him fall in love with her again, avoiding the pain they went both went through, or she can choose to reject him, to keep him safe. If she does, then your other world will still exist" _But she won't. She can't. Can she?_

D'Hoffryn was silent for a moment, considering her reasoning. "You present a good argument. But know this: If you try anything like this again, without consulting me first, I will revoke your powers"

"But – " Kimardi tried to protest, but was interrupted by her boss.

"You will not go against me. You are one of my favourites, Kimardi, but be warned that it will not cloud my judgement when dealing with you"

The brunette ducked her head a little, her long curls falling in front of her face. "Yes, D'Hoffryn"

* * *

The last two days had been equal parts interesting and completely boring. Buffy had fallen asleep in more than one of her classes, she found it hard to concentrate, and her already minimal note taking had become nearly nonexistent. On the other hand, she got to see her old literary professor, who she had always liked, as well as a few of the acquaintances she had made.

The most difficult aspect of being back in her past though was being around Spike. Whenever she was around him, she had to stop herself from just throwing herself into his arms and telling how wrong she was, how sorry she was, and how much she loved him. So she had spent as much time as possible staying away from the bleached blonde, as horrible as that hurt her. It hurt more to be near him though. The worst part had been when Giles had suggested moving him from the chair to the bath where they could 'chain him up more securely'.

* * *

Giles held the crossbow steadily, the weapon loaded and aimed directly at the vampire's heart. Keeping a wary eye on him, he nodded to Buffy. The blonde saw her cue and moved forward, slowly untying the rope that bound him to the chair.

"Is this really necessary?"

"Let me be very clear about this, Spike. We do not trust you. Nor do I find it likely that you will gain our trust anytime in the near future" Giles informed him coldly, his eyes glinting dangerously.

Spike glared at the other man but held his tongue. Once Buffy had finished freeing him, she immediately grabbed his upper arm and dragged him to his feet. "Bloody hell! Careful with the merchandise, Slayer!"

"Shut up, Spike" she replied automatically, her tone similar to how it had been before during the battle. It was almost... affectionate, and this time, it did not escape the vampire's attention.

She guided him roughly down the hall towards the bathroom, avoiding his gaze the entire way. Tightening her grip on his arm, she focused on just getting him chained up again. Then she could get out of there.

Spike tried not to let the Slayer's grip on his arm affect him, but his starvation had seriously depleted his health, making him not only weaker in strength, but more susceptible to physical damage. He didn't fight her, knowing he would only hurt himself. He could feel the bone in his arm beginning to give but kept silent. However, when she tightened her grip, he couldn't stop the quiet whimper from escaping him.

It was almost inaudible and she nearly missed it, but she heard the small sound of pain come from the blonde she was hauling down the corridor. Yet when she glanced back, he had schooled his features into a mask of indifference. She continued walking, but cast a quick glance at the spot on his arm where she held him firmly, finally realising how tight her grip was. Loosening her hold, she gave him and apologetic look, unsure if he saw it or not as he kept his eyes stubbornly away from her.

Finally reaching the bathroom in the few moments that had seemed to drag for hours, she closed the door and locked it. The chains had already been placed in the bathroom and she picked them up. Walking back to Spike, she stared down at the floor.

"I'm sorry Spike, but you understand why we're doing this, right?"

He gave her a deadly look, his blue eyes burning into hers, but nodded. _Jus' play the hand you've been dealt, mate. They'll get sloppy eventually, then you can get outta here. Can' believe I thought these bloody wankers might help me._

Grasping one of his wrists, Buffy lifted it and placed one of the metal cuffs around it. The sound of it clicking shut echoed ominously around the room. Reaching for his other one, she swallowed thickly when he flinched away instinctively.

"I'm not gonna hurt you" she said softly, looking up and meeting his gaze for the first time. Spike saw surprisingly that she meant it and dropped his gaze with another nod. He raised his other hand and held it out for Buffy to place the second cuff on him.

"You have no idea what they did to me in there" His eyes filled with pain and helpless rage.

"No, I don't" she agreed, her voice as equally soft as it had been before.

As quickly as he had let his emotions show, he had shut them up again behind the wall of arrogance and sarcasm. He couldn't hide from Buffy though, and she could still see everything he tried to prevent the world from viewing within the depths of his eyes.

Spike curled his tongue behind his teeth and smirked at Buffy. "Besides, I think you just get all hot 'n' bothered seein' me in chains, luv"

She attempted to stop her mind from flickering to the memories of her and Spike in his crypt when chains had been involved in a very different ways.

"_No, look at me. I... love you" Spike told her, his hand holding her face up and forcing her gaze to his open and vulnerable look._

"_Do you trust me?" he asked, holding up a pair of handcuffs._

"_No touching" she warned him, running her hands down his bare arms, his hands locked firmly to the bars of the bed above his head. It was her turn to explore._

Her face heated up, her cheeks colouring at some of the images she could see in her mind's eye. "Get in the tub" she commanded quickly, her voice a little higher than she meant it to be.

Spike raised an eyebrow at her but climbed into the bath and sat down. _Wonder what's goin' on in that pretty lil' head o' hers. _He remained silent while Buffy leaned down and secured his ankles in the same way, the two sets of cuffs joined by metal links that resulted in severely restricting his range of movements.

"How's your shoulder?" she asked, not looking at him. It too painful to look in his eyes and not see the love she'd once taken for granted swirling among the emotions there. The hatred that had been there before cut her deeply. _It's better this way. People who love me have a tendency to get hurt, whether it's directly by me or not. This'll keep him alive._ She clung to these thoughts desperately, the only ones keeping her sane as she relived the moments of four years ago.

"'S healin'" he answered with a shrug, his eyes betraying his nervousness and distrust. Yet his gut was telling him she was genuine even as his instincts screamed _'Slayer! Danger!'_

Buffy cast a quick look up and frowned at the small wince that involuntarily accompanied the shrug. "Not very fast"

"Yeah, well, 've not exactly been eatin' right, 'ave I?" he replied, begrudging of the group of commandos that had taken his very nature away from him. "Still don' know what the buggers did to me" he added quietly.

"It's a behaviour modification chip" Buffy told him. As soon as the words left her mouth she realised her slip and her eyes went wide. _I've got to stop doing that! Stupi, stupid, stupid Buffy!_

"It's a what?" He turned narrowed, ice blue eyes to her, fixing her with a steely glare.

"I-I" she stammered. _Time to be creative._ "I overheard one of the commandos. I never saw his face but he was talking about tracing..." her voice trailed off. Glancing up she saw that he appeared to be buying what she was saying so far. "What did they call it...?" she mumbled.

"A hostile?" Spike provided, growling lowly in his chest.

Buffy nodded eagerly. "Yeah, they said they were looking for a hostile with a behaviour modification chip. Then one of them said that there was no point, they'd seen 'it' attack someone and the chip obviously worked. I figured they were talking about you"

Spike nodded but the cogs in his mind were turning. _There's no way those bloody great gits would be _that _careless. Somethin's off with 'er._

"Okay, so, are you hungry? Of course you are. So, blood. Yeah. I'll just be uh... getting that then" she babbled, quickly standing and leaving the room, shutting the door firmly behind her before he could say anything. Making her decision, she told Giles to get some blood for Spike and fled the apartment.

* * *

Since then, she'd avoided all contact with Spike. She'd done well so far, but Giles had asked her to vamp-sit for him in a few nights as he had something he needed to do. _Could he have vagued that up a bit for me? _She thought, rolling her eyes.

But she had agreed. Now she was dreading it, knowing that it meant she would be in close quarters with the blonde vampire. _Definitely not of the good. I'm not ready to face him._

That wasn't her only issue though, as the situation she had found herself in with Riley had left her feeling awkward and uncertain. The growing attentions towards her from the towering teaching assistant made her uncomfortable, but she smiled and acted like she was interested, even as her heart broke a little more each day, knowing Spike was alive but still out of her reach. _Just until I know it's safe to change the past_ she told herself, even as she felt her fake smile crack slightly each time she talked with Riley.

But it had been two more days until she had finally managed to get Anya on her own. They had been pointlessly researching a demon Buffy had run into on patrol the day before. She had checked in with Giles as she usually did and he had insisted on finding it, even though she already knew that it wasn't anything apocalyptic. Still, she didn't want to raise suspicions. Yet anyway.

The blonde closed the book she'd been 'reading' for the past half an hour and looked to the brunette girl. "Hey, Anya, wanna go on a doughnut run?"

_So much for not raising suspicions_ she thought at the strange looks she'd gotten from Giles, Xander and Anya. Locking eyes with the other girl, she tried to convey her message silently through her pleading green gaze. Anya must have seen something, because she smiled and nodded, standing and walking with Buffy to the door. As the door shut, Buffy kept walking, and though she fell into step with the blonde, Anya immediately began her interrogation.

* * *

"What's the real reason you asked me to come with you?" she asked directly.

"Can't get anything past you, can I, Anya?" Buffy asked in amusement, smiling at Anya. It had taken her by surprise when she found herself missing the ex-demon's presence and vowed to prevent her death, if she could.

Anya smiled brightly. "Nope" she stated proudly.

Grinning at her, Buffy got straight to the point. It was one of Anya's quirks that she had secretly admired. Blunt, no beating around the bush. "I think I might have made a wish. So I need to know if you know about anything other than vengeance demons that could grant wishes"

Anya nodded slightly. "There are others. The Fae can sometimes grant wishes, and then there are genies. Umm... there are a few mystical items that when invoked can cast wishes, such as the Stone of Solomon, but I wouldn't recommend using them. They're just too unpredictable"

"Okay, well if the wish I might have made is the one I think it might be then I wasn't holding anything, so we can rule out items"

"Well that depends. The Stone doesn't have to be held. Once activated, it can grant any wish made within a certain distance"

Buffy glanced down, her brow furrowed in thought. _No... the only other person around was Willow, and she tried to comfort me. So I don't think it was her..._ She slowly shook her head. "No, I'm pretty certain it couldn't have been that"

"Could you tell me what your wish was about? That might help" suggested Anya.

"Umm, I basically wished that... someone had never loved me" she mumbled.

"What was that?"

"That someone had never loved me" Buffy repeated a little louder.

Anya frowned. "Well that makes no sense. Why would you do that?"

"They died because they loved me. The wish was a mistake, I know. But I was hurting, and I didn't mean to, I swear" she babbled.

Anya threw her hands in the air. "Buffy" she sighed in exasperation.

"What?" she asked defensively.

"Do you know what my speciality was as a vengeance demon?" Anya asked in an irritated tone.

Buffy nodded. "To avenge scorned women"

Anya returned her nod. "Right. Well there are different demons that specialise in different types of wishes. I helped women who had been betrayed by the men in their lives. My best friend, Halfrek, helps children whose parents don't treat them like they should. There are others, but I think I know who might have been responsible for granting your wish"

Buffy listened intently, nodding as Anya spoke. She was glad that she had come to her for help, and was grateful to the girl's perceptiveness that had obviously told her not to ask too many questions. "Who do you think it might be?"

"One of my other vengeance demon friends. She's a little different to the rest and D'Hoffryn has almost gotten rid of her more than once"

"What do you mean?" Buffy asked curiously.

"Well, most of us" Anya grimaced for a moment. "_Them_" she corrected. "Don't care about the amount of damage they do. Kimardi does. Instead of seeing how much she can interpret a wish for the worst, she tries to get the best out of it. As you can imagine, it doesn't always go down well with D'Hoffryn"

"So, what makes you think this... Kimardi was the one who granted my wish?"

"Because her raison d'être... is the pain of losing a loved one. She especially likes to use time travel, for obvious reasons. Sometimes people just wish to have more time with the one they lost, or that they could have done something to stop it"

They walked in silence for a few moments as Buffy contemplated all the information Anya had given her. Suddenly, Anya gasped. "Oh my God! You're from the future! Or, at least, your consciousness is!" she exclaimed excitedly.

Buffy's head whipped up, opening her mouth to protest. Seeing the look on Anya's face, she stopped before she even began. "You can't tell anyone, Anya. I have no idea what this means. I could mess up the whole future just by being here"

"I wouldn't worry about it" Anya said dismissively, flipping her hair over her shoulder and motioning distractedly.

Buffy gaped at the brunette. "How can you say that?"

"Because by being sent back, you've already erased that future. You can either make sure it stays the same and recreate it, or use your experiences to change it" she explained.

"But, what if it doesn't change things for the better?"

"You can't know that. You just have to use your own judgement. Just remember to think about the consequences each decision can have. It's a big responsibility" she paused for a second then gave Buffy a big smile. "Good luck" Anya patted her on the back.

"Thanks, Anya" Buffy replied wryly, trying and failing to stop the grin that rose to her lips.

* * *

"Oh he totally deserved it" Buffy's voice rang through the apartment as she opened the door to Giles' home forty minutes later.

"Some of my best work if you ask me" agreed Anya.

The two girls entered the room and Buffy placed the box of doughnuts they'd bought on the table and the bag next to her feet. Instantly, the men jumped up and snagged a couple each. Buffy grabbed one as well before taking a seat next to Anya of the sofa.

Anya picked up one of the books on the table, as well as a pen and pad of writing paper. Giles looked at her strangely and she shrugged. "It's for doodling when I get bored"

Accepting her explanation, Giles simply sighed and sat back to continue to read the book he'd placed to one side. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the brown bag Buffy had placed down. "What's that?"

Buffy looked up at the sound of his voice. "What's what?"

Giles pointed down to the brown bag and gave her a questioning look. "Oh, that's just blood for Spike. Thanks for reminding me actually" Jumping up, she took the bag to the kitchen and put the blood packets she'd bought from the butcher in the fridge.

Xander and Giles stared incredulously after her as she left. They were still staring when she bounced back in and returned to her seat. "What? He needed blood" She fidgeted on the sofa but remained resolute in her answer. _They ain't gettin' nothin' outta me_ she thought, grinning internally.

As if on cue, a loud and very distinctive British accent sounded from the bathroom. "Hey! 'M bloody starvin' in 'ere!" he yelled, causing Giles and Xander to groan.

Giles looked to Buffy, hoping she'd offer to help with feeding the vampire, but she was staring at her nails like they were the most interesting thing in the world. When his silent pleas were ignored, he stood with a sigh and made his way to the kitchen. He grabbed one of the blood bags from the fridge and turned in the direction of the bathroom.

He pushed the door open to see Spike sat up as much as possible in the bath and grumbling under his breath. The blonde hadn't noticed the other Brit's entrance and was tugging uselessly at the chains before hanging his head and giving up again. Giles cleared his throat and took a certain amount of pleasure in making the vampire jump.

Spike cursed quietly when Giles made him jump. _God, 'm losin' m' touch. I shoulda known where 'e was 'n' who 'e was before 'e even made it to the door._ The fact that it seemed his preternatural senses had severely dulled, as well as having lost himself in his thoughts and allowing the Watcher to creep up on him, meant that he was in a much worse shape than even he thought. And it scared him. Not that he'd let his captors know. Fear was weakness, a weakness he couldn't afford at the moment.

Giles approached the tub and held out the bag in his hand, watching Spike expectantly. Spike looked at the bag in disdain and glanced up at him. He moved the bag closer to the blonde's face and waited for him to change.

"Couldn't you at least heat it up?" Spike wrinkled his nose at the thought of drinking pig's blood alone, without it being cold.

"Well, if you don't want it..." Giles turned around and made to exit the bathroom.

"No!" Spike shouted. Glancing away and mentally kicking himself, he lowered his voice. "No"

Giles smiled coldly and held the bag out again. Swallowing hard, Spike morphed and sunk his fangs into the bag. Trying not to gag as the viscous fluid entered his mouth and filled his senses with the horrible taste and scent of dead animal blood, he drained the entire bag.

Giles nodded once and left without another word, leaving Spike to wallow in his misery, loathing and increasing hunger.

* * *

Anya had been flicking through the book she was reading at an impressive rate, but she hadn't been reading it like she was supposed to. No, she was looking for something in particular. She sighed in relief when she finally found the right page and picked up the pen she'd placed to one side. Her hand moved fluidly across the page as she scribbled down the details.

Buffy had curled up on the sofa with one of the books, flipping idly through the pages to make it look like she was Research Girl. Fighting the urge to yawn every minute, she kept her eyes on the boring text that seemed to blur into one indistinguishable shape. She thanked any God that was listening when she got distracted.

As discreetly as possible, Anya nudged Buffy's foot with her own. Without looking up, she saw the blonde girl raise her head in question. Ensuring her movements were as subtle as she could make them, she folded the piece of paper she'd written on and slipped it next to her foot, using it to slide it across the sofa. Buffy raised her eyebrow, but her curiosity was piqued. Carefully, she reached down and picked it up. _Oh yeah, passing notes in class definitely helps in the real world_ she thought, unaware that the same thing was passing through Anya's mind.

Unfolding the piece of paper, Buffy read the note, her eyes widening as she reached the end. Looking up again, she locked eyes with Anya. Buffy smiled at her and mouthed 'Thank you'. Anya returned her smile and nodded.

* * *

_To summon Kimardi you'll need:_

_1 black rose_

_1 dark crimson rose_

_1 white rose_

_Ground poppy seeds_

_The magic shop in town should sell the seeds. If not, Wal-mart will. The flowers you can obviously get at a florist._

_Put the ground up poppy seeds in a bowl and light them with a match. Then chant this, and at the end of each line, throw one petal from each rose into the flames._

'_Kimardi, I summon thee_

_I beg of you, hear my plea_

_And to appear before me_

_In the name of all loves lost'_

_Talk to her, and when you're done, tell me everything._

Refolding the note and tucking it into her jean's pocket, Buffy smiled. Finally, she had a place to start.

* * *

A/N: I know this chapter didn't really move forward as such, but I needed to get Buffy in a place where she has someone she could confide in ( and Anya seemed like the best choice to me :D ) and get help from. I promise that more will be happening in the next chapter as Buffy finally gets to talk to Kimardi and find out the conditions of her position in the past.

For the ritual to summon Kimardi, I wanted to choose flowers that would represent her raison d'être, and I found honeysuckle, aloe and fir, but thought in the end that the roses were more appropriate. Pretty too XD

In case you're interested, these are the meanings I found at various sites on the Internet:

Honeysuckle: Bonds of love

Fir: Time

Aloe: Grief and pain

White Rose: Eternal love

Black Rose: Death

Crimson Rose: Mourning

Poppy: Eternal sleep, oblivion. The seeds are used in medicine such as morphine, and the drug opium can be extracted from them. All induce sleepiness or numbness of some sort, so I thought it was appropriate. I chose the seeds instead of the actual flower to add some variety because of I'd already decided on the use of rose petals. I thought it was a nice touch :)

So, thank you for reading and please let me know what you thought =)


	5. The Summoning

For disclaimer and summary, please see chapter 1.

A/N: Sorry for the wait! Hopefully, you'll like this chapter and won't mind though ;)

Thanks to Carol, Doni and Sailor Sayuri for their reviews, especially for Sayuri's enthusiasm lol cos hey, I love chocolate XD So thank you to you both, so much, and to anyone who's reading this fic =)

* * *

Chapter 5 : The Summoning

Buffy cast a glance at the clock and calculated how long she had before Giles would leave. _Three hours. Plenty of time._ "Giles, I've gotta go. There a paper I need to work on for Walsh"

"Buffy, do you really think that – "

Buffy stood and held up her hand. "I'm sorry, Giles, but college is important to me. I promise I'll be back by seven"

Slipping her hand into her back pocket, she doubled checked that the note from Anya was still there. "See you later" she threw over her shoulder, waving at the three occupants of the living room and leaving the apartment.

First stop, the dorms of UC Sunnydale.

* * *

Buffy opened the door and was relieved to find that Willow wasn't around. She wasn't up to explaining anything right now. Grabbing her school bag, she slung it over her shoulder and left the room as quickly as she had arrived.

As she walked through the main area of the dorm she saw Willow and Tara talking on one of the sofas. Smiling to herself, she kept her head down and hoped they wouldn't see her. The blonde weaved her way through the crowds of the college campus, pleased that she managed to do so without bumping into anyone she knew. Her next destination was the magic shop in town. She hoped they'd have the poppy seeds she needed because otherwise she had no idea where she'd have to go to get them. _Maybe the grocery store? Do they even sell any kind of seeds?_

Shaking her head, Buffy headed across town to Maple Court and to the shop that Giles had owned in the future that she had come from. _And he will again, if I have anything to do with it. I wonder if he'll wear that big purple hat and cloak again_ she thought with a grin. She made the journey in record time, and twenty minutes later she was browsing the shelves in the dark shop, her brow furrowed as she read the different labels on the items.

A voice sounded from directly behind her, startling her as she whirled to face the owner. "Can I help you?" asked the man.

"Oh, uh, maybe" she began, smiling uncertainly at the strange man in front of her. "I'm looking for poppy seeds" she said, the statement sounding more like a question as her voice rose at the end.

"Relax, kid. My name's Mr Bogarty, I'm the owner of this establishment" Buffy's smile became slightly more genuine. She knew she'd heard the name before but couldn't think where. "Do you want grounded or whole ones?"

"Grounded, please. Less work for me" she replied, grinning a little.

Mr Bogarty smiled at her and nodded, walking away and picking something up from one of the other shelves. Returning to her side he held out a small bag. "There you go, Miss, one bag of fresh crushed poppy seeds"

Buffy smiled and took them from him. A moment later, she had paid the man and thanked him for his help. _Well, that was surprisingly easy. _She left the store quickly, relaxing now that she had the ingredient that was most likely to cause trouble and headed for the nearby florist.

* * *

The bell above the door jingled as she pushed the door open and entered the shop. _What's with that damn bell? Does every shop have one or something?_ Buffy thought in annoyance.

She was about to begin looking for the flowers she needed when a young girl no older than herself approached her. Buffy instantly felt calm around the other woman, her friendly smile putting her at ease.

"Hi there, do you need any help or are you just looking?" she asked, pushing her auburn hair away from her face.

"I'm actually looking for something pretty specific"

"That's okay. Maybe I can find it for you" she smiled again.

"Umm, well... I'd like a black, white and crimson rose" The woman looked a little surprised, her eyes filling with sympathy as she ducked her head to avoid eye contact. Buffy looked her curiously. "What?"

"Nothing" she answered quickly. At Buffy's look she sighed and continued. "It's just... do you know what they mean? You know, specifically?"

Buffy shook her head so she explained further. "The white rose means eternal love" she smiled at Buffy and the blonde returned it. "But the black and crimson are for death and mourning" Dropping her gaze again, the woman paused before asking her question. "Did you lose someone close to you?" her eyes shot up. "You don't have to answer if you don't want"

Buffy smiled sadly at the other girl and nodded solemnly. "It's fine. Yeah, I did. He died almost five months ago" _Technically it's true. It's had been 147 days for me. I guess that's what you call irony._

The girl nodded and gave her a small smile. "I'm sorry, I can tell you loved him very much"

Buffy returned her nod. "I do"

The girl didn't mention Buffy's use of the present tense, just nodded with another kind smile. "Let me see if I can find them" she said softly, and Buffy was glad for the change of subject. It hurt just to think about it. She wasn't ready to talk about it. After all, leaving the man you loved to burn up in the mouth of hell in order to save the world, only to make a wish that pulls you into your past to a time when he hates you and possibly have the chance to make everything right again? It was confusing to say the least. Not to mention this stranger would think she was insane.

The girl walked away and Buffy followed, watching as she selected one of each of the flowers she'd asked for.

"So, you know a lot about flowers?"

"I wouldn't say a lot. I just always loved the different meanings behind them. You can tell someone so much just by giving them a single flower. It's why I bought this store" Gently, she laid the roses in a sheet of plastic, which she carefully wrapped around the stems. "See, I think gestures like this..." she motioned to the three flowers. "... are more effective than buying a whole bunch. A dozen red roses are romantic, but to me, screams 'I want attention, give it to me'. A single red rose shows passion and love. It's cheaper too, so people are less likely to worry about costs" she added with a laugh.

Buffy grinned at her. "Where did you learn about all of this?"

"Well, my mom was very into gardening, and she brought me up learning about all the different flowers and plants and what each one meant. It caught my interest and I fell in love with the interpretations that can be made from them. What simply a colour can say to, and about, a person"

Buffy smiled at the young woman who was quite clearly passionate about her chosen interest. The store had quite obviously become her livelihood, but it was still her hobby, and Buffy admired that.

The blonde was pulled from her thoughts by the girl's soft voice. "Is that all you wanted?" she asked.

Buffy smiled and nodded, reaching into her bag for her purse. The girl smiled as well but shook her head. "Here" she handed the small bouquet to Buffy. "They're on the house"

"Oh, I couldn't – " Buffy hadn't told her about losing Spike to receive the flowers free of payment.

"Let me guess" the woman interrupted, her tone kind but teasing. "You think I'm just doing this because you told me your sob story?" Buffy blushed lightly and ducked her head a little. "It's okay. It's understandable, but that's not the reason. This isn't charity, it's my way of... offering my condolences I guess"

Buff picked up the flowers, bringing them to her nose and inhaling their sweet scent. "Thank you"

"Sure thing. Just make sure to let all your friends know about my shop, okay?" she replied, lightening the mood considerably.

"You bet. Thanks again"

The girl nodded and gave her one last small smile. "Bye"

Buffy nodded back but paused at the door. "Sorry, do you have the time?"

The owner glanced down at her watch. "Quarter to six" she told her after a moment. Buffy smiled her thanks, then turned and left the store. Weighing her options, she shrugged her shoulders and turned in the direction of the Espresso Pump. _May as well get some of that paper worked on after all._

She ordered a coffee and sat on one of the stools, pulling out her psychology text box, paper and pens. With a sigh, she took a sip of her drink and got to work.

* * *

About an hour later, Buffy packed up her things and placed the roses in her bag, making sure they wouldn't get crushed but wanting to keep them hidden from her Watcher. _God knows what he'd do if he found out what I'm gonna use them for._

She opened the door to Giles' apartment and walked straight to the sofa, dropping her bag on a chair at the dining table on her way past. "I'm here"

Giles watched as his charge walked directly past him and planted herself on the sofa. "Yes, hello Buffy. Uh, sorry for doing this but I can't listen to anymore of his infernal yelling"

"I heard that!" Spike shouted.

"It's fine. You go enjoy you're night out. I'll patrol when you get back" She picked up the remote and flicked on the television.

"Right" Giles shuffled his feet awkwardly at the door. "Thank you" he added.

Buffy turned her head and gave him a bright smile. "Have fun"

Giles nodded and looked like he was going to say something else. Instead he just turned and left, leaving a slightly perplexed Buffy behind.

She fidgeted in her seat to get comfortable and kept her eyes on the television without really watching it until she knew he wasn't coming back. Casting one last glance towards the front door she stood and took the flowers and seeds from her bag, removing the note from her pocket and unfolding it, placing it next to the ingredients.

Next, she opened the cupboard she knew Giles used to store his spell components. Selecting one of the wooden bowls, she placed it on the table before grabbing a set of matches from the kitchen. Taking a deep breath, Buffy began the ritual.

* * *

She opened the small bag of crushed poppy seeds and emptied all of it into the small bowl. Lighting a match, she double checked the instructions Anya had written down for her. Once she was sure she'd followed the first step, she touched the edge of the match to the seeds. Instantly, they caught alight, and Buffy gasped as she whipped her hand back. Blinking, she stared at the golden flames flickering in the bowl as the seeds burned. _Okay, how is the bowl not catching fire? I mean, fire is flammable, right?_

Shaking her head and deciding that she'd really rather not contemplate the strange way magic worked, Buffy pursed her lips and blew out the match. She placed in the bag that had contained the seeds, guessing that her Watcher wouldn't appreciate it if she allowed his apartment to catch fire, especially from something as stupid as a stray match that she hadn't put out properly.

Inhaling deeply, Buffy closed her eyes and tried to find her calm as Giles had taught her. Slowly, her eyes opened again, and she began to chant quietly.

"Kimardi, I summon thee" She plucked a single white, crimson and black petal from each of the flowers and dropped them into the fire simultaneously. The small fire grew for a second before shrinking again, the flames shimmering before changing to a light pink. The smoke that had begun to swirl upwards turned to a dark red.

"I beg of you, hear my plea" She repeated the steps and added three more petals to the bowl. The fire grew and shrunk as before, the pink changing to a blinding white, the smoke turning a pale blue.

"And to appear before me" Three more petals fell into the bowl, this time the flames turning jet black and the smoke became charcoal.

"In the name of all lost loves" She added the last three petals the ritual needed and held her breath. The flames turned midnight blue and the now deep purple smoke billowed from the bowl. Buffy watched with baited breath as it trailed from the bowl down to the floor across from her. It grew rapidly, swirling upwards as a clap of thunder sounded, making Buffy shriek in shock.

Holding a hand to her chest, she waited for the smoke to clear and her heart beat to return to normal. The flames suddenly went out and the smoke vanished leaving a figure in its place.

* * *

The beautiful woman stepped forward and Buffy had to suppress the urge to gawp openly at her. She wasn't exactly what she'd been expecting. Admittedly, Buffy hadn't been sure what to expect, especially after meeting both Hallie and Anya, but it certainly wasn't the young woman stood in front of her now. She looked like she could have just stepped out of class at the college. She was wearing a pair of deep blue jeans that hugged her figure and a deep purple blouse with flowing sleeves. The entire outfit was very simplistic, but clung to her curves and flattering her physique. The woman, who she presumed to be Kimardi, brushed her long dark curls over her shoulders and smiled at her. Almost reverently, she touched the stone pendant around her neck that matched the colour of the smoke she had appeared in.

"You summoned me?"

Buffy shook her head as she came back to her senses. _Huh, I imagined her to be... older. Or at least more sombre. She looks... young and modern. I guess even vengeance demons keep up to date with the latest styles._ "Yeah. Uh, I wanted to talk to you about a wish I might have made"

Kimardi nodded and smiled. "I thought you might" she walked over to the sofa and perched on the edge of its back. "What do you wanna know?"

"Okay, umm... let's start with this. Can I tell anyone I'm from the future?"

"I think that's a bit redundant. Anyanka's much sharper than she let's on" Kimardi grinned and the stunned Slayer, her sparkling blue eyes dancing with mirth.

"Wait, you know about that?"

Kimardi shrugged. "I like to check in on the people I help. I happened to catch part of your conversation"

"So you already know what she told me? About the future having been erased?"

The pretty brunette shifted her weight as she thought about how to answer. "It's a little more complicated than that, but essentially, yeah. The future isn't set in stone. You're free to use what you know to change events"

"No terms or conditions? No rules and regulations?" the blonde quipped.

Kimardi smiled and shook her head. "Nope" She fixed her intent gaze, locking her eyes with Buffy's green ones. "But there is a no returns policy" she added seriously. "If you do decide to change something, and the outcome is worse than how you remembered it to be, you have to live with it"

"Wow, Anya was right. Big responsibility"

Kimardi nodded. "The weight of knowing what's to come always is. Seers are usually the only ones to carry such a burden"

Buffy was silent for a moment, taking in everything Kimardi had told her. She'd forgotten half the things she wanted to ask, but one question kept surfacing. Opening her mouth, she asked the one thing that had been confusing her since she had woken up in her past. "Why here?"

At the confused look she received, Buffy explained. "Why send me back to the past? I wished that he didn't love me. This doesn't make sense"

The brunette smiled. "To me it does. Now, before I tell you anymore, I want you to tell me something"

Buffy nodded and waited for Kimardi's inquiry. With a conspiratorial smile, Kimardi leaned closer. "Did you forget that your... 'guest' has vampiric hearing?"

Buffy's eyes grew comically and Kimardi had to stifle the laugh the rose in her chest. Leaning closer, she continued in a whisper. "I don't think it matters, but what I'm about to tell you is very important"

Kimardi looked the blonde girl in the eyes, making sure she had her full attention. "I sent you back here because this is when the _foundations_ for his love for you were built. I sent you back to the most recent time when he _didn't _love you, giving you the choice to change everything, or keep it the same"

Buffy looked questioningly at the demon. "What do you mean, the 'foundations'?"

Kimardi didn't answer for a minute, wondering how much to tell her, but just when Buffy thought she wouldn't say anything, she spoke. She lowered her voice further until it was just a murmur and Buffy had to focus to catch what she was saying. "The spell. Tomorrow Willow will find her boyfriend's things gone, and in approximately 30 hours she will cast the 'Will be Done' spell, resulting in you and Spike believing you are engaged"

Buffy nodded. She remembered the spell Kimardi was talking about. _Boy do I remember it._ She'd always wished she could be as happy as she had been during that spell, but for real. "How does that affect his feelings though? He still hated me after the spell ended" she whispered back.

Kimardi smiled at Buffy's naivety and shook her head. "No, he didn't. He reacted the way he did because of the way _you_ did. The spell let him see a softer side of you that you stopped showing to anyone after Angel left you"

"You seem to know a lot about me" Buffy stated suspiciously.

The brunette laughed softly. "I do my homework" she replied in amusement. "Anyway, the spell showed him who _Buffy_ is, who you are when you're not being the Slayer"

"I'm always the Slayer" Buffy responded darkly.

"Okay, bad phrasing. When you're not kicking undead ass" Both woman grinned at that. "What I'm trying to say is that if you stop Willow from casting the spell, it's almost certain that he'll never fall for you" Kimardi didn't mention how she believed it to be inevitable, no matter what. The other world D'Hoffryn had showed her was possible, but somehow, she just didn't see it coming to fruition. A certain seer had already seen the feelings lying undiscovered within the vampire, and had known that his heart no longer belonged to her.

"So, stop the spell, Spike never falls for me and he stays alive" Buffy said to herself, nodding slightly.

"Can I just say one thing?" Buffy nodded again. "What makes you so certain that it's his love for you that caused his death in the Hellmouth? Did you ever think that maybe it wasn't your fault or his?" When she was met with Buffy's silence she smiled internally. _That's it, get her thinking._ "There may be other ways to prevent his death. Just think about it"

Kimardi stepped back and smiled at the contemplative blonde. "But remember, whatever you do, there are always consequences" She winked at Buffy. "But then, there always are, whether you know the events of the future or not"

Buffy grinned at Kimardi and nodded, feeling better than she had in a while. "Thank you"

"Of course. If you ever wanna talk to me again, just give me a chant" Kimardi returned her grin. "Good luck" In a puff of deep purple smoke identical to the one she had appeared in, Kimardi was gone.

* * *

Buffy cleared away the items she'd used for the summoning spell silently, her thoughts spiralling in never ending circles as she went over her conversation with Kimardi. She emptied the ingredients into the bin, as well as the flowers that she had taken just a few petals from. Buffy smiled sadly as she dropped them in with the rest of the rubbish, they really were a beautiful arrangement. The white, crimson and black complemented each other perfectly.

Sighing, she turned and threw open a window to try and disperse the slight smell of the magic she had performed that still lingered in the air. Just then, something else Kimardi had said hit her. _"Did you forget that your... 'guest' has vampiric hearing?"_ Buffy gulped and her face blanched. Spike knew she was from the future.

She spun in the direction of the bathroom, her heartbeat increasing, thumping against her chest so loud she could hear it in her ears. _Oh God, what do I do?_ Her anxiety only rose when she realised he'd been silent for a long time.

Gathering her courage, she went to the kitchen and opened one of the blood bags from the fridge, pouring the contents into the yellow 'Kiss the Librarian' mug that had unofficially been labelled as Spike's. She put it in the microwave and punched in the familiar sequence of numbers before leaning against the counter and tapping her fingernails on the top in a rapid motion and a useless attempt at calming her nerves.

She jumped when the microwave beeped. Grabbing a straw and trying to stop her hands from trembling, she retrieved the mug and made her way to the bathroom. She took a few deep breaths to steady herself and regain her composure and allowed her mask to fall into place. With the pretend grimace fixed on her face, she pushed the door open.

Spike had curled up on his side as much as his restraints allowed and his head was tipped back against the back of the tub, his neck stretched and a small frown marred his features. _That really doesn't look comfortable_ Buffy thought as she stepped closer. It seemed he was asleep, his eyes moving rapidly behind their lids and his hands twitching slightly. He began to get more restless and his lips moved ever so slightly as he started mumbling something under his breath. Buffy put the mug down at the edge of the sink and kneeled down next to the bath. Her breath hitched at his nearness but she tried to breathe as quietly as she could and ignore her own heartbeat as her blood pulsed through her veins in to try and catch what he was saying.

"No, don't... stop... no... it hurts... my head... God, please stop" his tortured whispers reached her ears and she felt the tears stinging the back of her eyes. Tiny whimpers sounded from his throat and his head flinched backwards, snapping her from her trance like state.

Gently, she rested her hands on his arms as his head started thrashing from side to side, his mumblings growing louder in volume. "Spike" she said firmly, but keeping her voice low and hoping not to startle him.

"Don't... don't touch me" Buffy wondered for a moment if he meant her, but his eyes were still closed.

She shook him lightly and raised her voice. "Spike. You're dreaming. It's okay, wake up"

He fought against her grip as it tightened around his wrists, a low growl building in his chest. Buffy shook him again, placing her mouth right next to his ear. "C'mon, wake up. It's just a dream. You're safe now, Spike"

It seemed to be his name that did it, his eyes snapping open and staring sightlessly ahead for a moment, still lost in the torment of his subconscious before they slowly refocused on the real world. The real world in which the Slayer was leaning very close to him, her face brushing faintly against his and his arms in her firm but gentle grip.

Instantly, he pulled away from her, breaking her hold on him. Buffy leaned back, shock and hurt filling her emerald eyes until she recovered. _Remember, this Spike doesn't love you. Not yet, anyway. God, what do I do?_ She asked herself once again.

"What the bloody hell are you playin' at, Slayer?" he asked angrily, covering his worry that she had seen him at his weakest. He'd known he was trapped in one of his recurring nightmares about _that place_, but he wondered what he'd done to make her come in like that. _I di'n't say anythin', did I? Oh, bollocks._ Dru had told him that he sometimes had the tendency to talk in his sleep but he'd forgotten as he'd let himself drift off to the sound of whatever the blonde Slayer had put on the television.

"You were dreaming and it didn't look pleasant. I thought I'd wake you up. So, you're welcome and remind me to never help you again" she stood and folded her arms across her chest.

"I don' need your soddin' help"

Buffy just raised an eyebrow and glanced down at his current position, then rolled her eyes and went to the sink. "And to think, I came in here 'cuz I thought you might be hungry" she said in a flippant tone, then picked up the mug and made to leave.

"What is it with you bloody white hats and takin' m' dinner away?"

Buffy returned to his side and knelt down again, a smirk on her lips. _God I missed this._ She'd forgotten how great they'd been at bantering. She placed the straw in the mug and held it out for him to drink from. When she glanced up though, the happy familiar feelings she'd had immediately vanished upon seeing the dislike that still burned in his blue gaze. This wasn't banter. This was him lashing out because he had no control over his life at the moment. From the moment he'd been captured, he'd been reliant on whatever help was thrown his way. And now he'd come to them.

Spike didn't know what had gotten into the girl in front of him, but it confused him. He'd thought she'd hold whatever had happened whilst he'd been asleep over his head, blackmail him or at least tease him, but... nothing. She'd just pretended like it had never happened. She'd been her normal self as she returned to his side, but as she looked up and caught his eye, a sadness seemed to envelop her and drag her down. She visibly deflated as her shoulders slumped and she dropped her eyes from his. Shaking his head imperceptibly to clear the strange thoughts, he drew the straw between his lips and gulped down the blood he'd been offered as quickly as he could. He closed his eyes, savouring the feel of the warm, thick liquid as he drank. It still tasted disgusting, but he was just too hungry to care and it was more bearable when it was warm and was grateful to her for heating it. Not that he'd ever tell her that.

When Buffy looked up again, she'd noticed he'd finished the blood and was just watching her intently. A slight blush coloured her cheeks at his piercing gaze asking unspoken question and ducked her head as she stood again. "Is that okay, or do you want some more?" she asked quietly.

Spike did a double take. Buffy was watching him from under her lashes and would have found the movement comical in any other situation. "What?" he snapped. _Did she just ask wha' I think she asked?_

"Blood. Did you want more?" Buffy shuffled her feet as he remained silent, squirming under his scrutiny.

Realising he had been staring, Spike blinked a few times and broke himself out of his daze. "Uh, sure" he answered warily.

Within a few minutes, Buffy was kneeling on the bathroom floor and feeding Spike once more. She saw the suspicion in his eyes and finally could take it anymore. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Your Watcher. 'E's never given me more than one bag, 'n' only when I complain loud enough that 'm 'ungry. 'E never heats it, _and_..." he emphasised, pausing for effect. "'E never asks me if I wan' more"

"Really? But... it's obvious you need to feed. I mean, you're not exactly looking your best right now"

"Thanks" he answered, his sarcasm back in full force.

Buffy rolled her eyes. "You know what I'm talking about though"

To her surprise, Spike nodded. "Smart bloke, that one. Doesn' wan' me up to full strength"

"But that's stupid. You can't hurt us"

"Doesn' matter, luv. 'S a good strategy really. 'S the sorta thing I wouldn' 'ave ever thought of"

A slight shiver ran down her spine at the use of one of his pet names. "Yeah, well, we both know how well your plans usually work out" Buffy grinned, proud when her voice stayed strong.

Spike glanced up at her and couldn't help but grin back. _Wha' are you doin', mate? She's the Slayer! You've gotta be losin' your bloody marble to be banterin' like this. 'N' you called her 'luv'. Get a grip, you're not friends._ _Time to re-establish that. _Suspicion crept back into his gaze. "Why are you bein' friendly? We're not friends, Slayer"

Her eyes clouded as a memory surfaced from years ago, or perhaps, only last year. _"Your _not _friends. You'll never be _friends_. You'll be in love 'til it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag and you'll hate each other 'til it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends."_

"No, Spike. We'll never be friends" she agreed quietly, her cryptic statement lost on the blonde vampire. Standing silently, she picked up the mug again and turned to leave, shutting the door behind her with a soft click.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for reading, I hope you liked it =)

One note though... I included the scene with Spike asleep cos I have an idea I was thinking about writing a one-shot for, but then felt that maybe it wouldn't work by itself. It's been sitting in the back of my brain for a little while now and when I started writing this chapter, I thought about perhaps including it in this story as a side plot. If I do decide to do that, then I needed to set up the ground work for it. I don't know if I'm going to use it yet or not, but there is a strong possibility. Let me know what you think, and whether it worked or not :)

Last thing is my usual pleas for reviews. So, please leave a review and comment on my work so far. I feed on feedback ( as bad a play on words as that is lol ) and hopefully, the next chapter will be written, edited and posted within the next few days =)


	6. The Night Before the Spell

For disclaimer and summary, please see chapter 1.

A/N: Yay for my reviewers!! Big thanks to lizaria, Carol and Sailor Sayuri for their wonderful comments, they give me warm fuzzy feelings lol =D

* * *

Chapter 6 : The Night Before the Spell

It was suffice to say that sleep that night did not come easily to Buffy. She tossed and turned as images of the blonde vampire flashed behind her eyelids, memories of the past that had occurred and of the future that she had the power to change. So much suffering, and she held the weight of it on her shoulders. Finally, she threw herself onto her back with a frustrated noise, staring at the ceiling above her in the darkened room.

She could hear the soft snores coming from the bed to her right, her redheaded friend asleep and blissfully unaware of Buffy's dilemma. _If I stop her from casting the spell, then Spike will never fall for me. Once he figures out he can fight demons, he'll leave, and he'll never end up in the Hellmouth._ It would hurt her, break the last fragile pieces of her heart to do so, but it would give her some peace to know he was still out there, somewhere, enjoying his unlife.

_But then what did Kimardi mean by "There may be other ways to prevent his death"? So, what if I let her cast the spell, I'm nice to him instead of acting like a complete bitca, and maybe we'll be together. _However, Buffy was intelligent enough to know that it wouldn't be as simple as her happy ever after. There were still so many events that had happened in her past / future that she wanted to prevent or change. _Oh! If I let her do the spell, I can bring up the issue of magic now. Maybe if Willow gets the training she needs in England _before _her powers get out of control, then she'll never go evil. _Then another thought hit her. The reason Willow went evil. _Oh, God. Tara. I can save her too! I'll take Warren down before he even gets a chance to _think _about being evil._

Buffy growled and closed her eyes briefly, rubbing her temples with her fingertips. It was just too much to think about, her brain felt like it was on overload. Her eyes snapped open again as she got an idea. She sighed and rolled onto her side in order to reach her nightstand, then pulled open the draw, retrieving the pad and pencil she knew to be there. She rolled onto her stomach and rested the pad on her pillow.

"Okay..." Buffy chewed on the end of her pencil as she tried to get her thoughts in order.

'_Will Be Done' Spell_

_The Gentlemen_

_Faith – help?_

_Adam – take down Initiative_

_Dawn – Key, sister_

_Glory – kill Ben?_

_Mom – hospital_

_Riley_

_Spike_

_Dru_

_Glory tortures Spike – see Glory_

_Portal jump – again, see Glory_

_Resurrection_

_Sweet_

_Willow's magic_

_Xander and Anya's not-a-wedding_

_Spike_

Buffy fought back the tears at the thought of all that she'd put him through. Sniffling slightly, she underlined it twice, making a silent promise to herself, and to him, that everything would be different this time. They would never get even remotely close to the situation in her bathroom. She knew now that whilst there were no excuses for what he tried to do, that it had been her behaviour towards him that had driven him to the desperate state he'd been in. No, it wasn't her fault, but it was her fault that he hadn't known she'd really meant 'no'. They'd both made mistakes. This was her chance to make things right. Certain that she wasn't going to start crying, she turned back to her list.

_The Trio – get them arrested for stealing the diamond?_

_Tara_

_Darth Rosenberg_

Buffy giggled quietly at the name Andrew had given the witch when her hair had darkened and her powers had increased exponentially, the black magic allowing her to almost end the world. _God bless Xander and his yellow crayon_ she thought wryly, but glad all the same. The outcome of that day could have been so different.

_Potentials_

_The First_

_Spike's soul??_

_Anya going demon-y_

_Trigger – a song?_

_Chip – flower shop _is _just a cover_

_Caleb_

_The vineyard – the scythe_

_The spell to activate potentials_

_Amulet_

_Battle in the Hellmouth_

Wracking her brains for anything she'd missed, she felt she'd gotten all the important bits. Lowering her trembling hand, she shakily added the last thing on her list.

_Spike's death_

Of all of them, that was the one she was most determined to prevent. Her features hardened in her resolve. Scanning back over her list, she fought back the daunting feeling of fear. _There's a lot there..._ She could do this. She would do this. She had no other choice.

Feeling a little better now she'd put her thoughts down on paper, she replaced her pad and pencil in the drawer. Buffy tucked her hand under her head and curled up as she closed her eyes, her mind eventually finding the peace and comfort of sleep.

* * *

Buffy woke slowly, stretching her muscles as a small smile curved her lips. Tonight was the night. Tomorrow she'd be engaged to the Slayer of Slayers. She giggled to herself at the irony of it all. _Who'da thunk it?_ She thought amusedly.

Pulling herself out of bed, she yawned and looked to the other bed. Willow's bed was already made and the room was empty. Her smile turned sad as she realised where the redhead must have gone. _Poor Wills._ Buffy took a minute amount of comfort from the fact that she knew how happy Willow and Tara were going to be together. Standing with another yawn, she grabbed her wash kit and clothes and made her way to the bathroom.

Half an hour later, the blonde was freshly clean and dressed, her still damp hair pulled back into a ponytail and left to dry naturally. She carefully applied her makeup and, after scrutinising her image in the mirror, she was satisfied with her appearance. She scrawled a quick note to Willow to let her know where she'd gone in case she returned and picked up her bag and keys, turning and leaving the dorm empty and silent.

As she walked, Buffy thought back to the conversation she'd had with Willow whilst patrolling last night. Yesterday, as she had been leaving class, Riley had caught up with her. She had tried to excuse herself and go to Giles', but he had been persistent, eventually getting her to agree to the picnic she vaguely remembered going on. She wasn't looking forward to it in the slightest, especially with the day of the spell getting closer. So she had talked to her friend about it to try and work it out in her own head.

"_It's just, different, you know? A picnic. Kind of a new venue Buffywise"_

"_But he's nice?" Willow asked._

"_Yeah, I guess. But... I don't know. I think he cares about me, but I feel like... something's missing"_

"_He's not making you miserable?"_

"_Exactly. Riley's seems so solid. He's safe. But..." Buffy sighed, waiting for her friend to take the bait. She wasn't disappointed._

"_But...?" the redhead encouraged._

"_He's human" At her friend's look, she hurried to continue. "I know, I know, I've always wanted a normal life. But let's face it. Not only am I never going to be normal, but how can I explain my strength. And then, what if he can't deal with having a girlfriend stronger than him? I just... can't do it, Wills"_

"_So you want someone..." Willow paused for a moment, thinking how best to word her question before proceeding cautiously. "...more than human?"_

_Buffy played dumb and shrugged, keeping her eyes looking ahead. "Maybe, I guess. I don't know. But I can't help thinking — isn't that where the fire comes from? Can a nice, safe relationship be that intense? I know it's nuts, but... part of me believes that real love and passion have to go hand in hand with pain and fighting" Her eyes glazed over as memories of her relationship with Spike surfaced._

_Just then, a vampire jumped out from behind a bush, snapping her from out of her reverie. Staking him instinctually, Buffy and Willow ignored the interruption and kept walking. "I wonder where I get that from" the blonde wondered absently._

"_Well, maybe he's just not right for you then. Buffy, I'm your friend and I just want you to be happy. If Riley doesn't do that, then..." Willow trailed off with a shrug._

"_Thanks, Wills" Buffy gave her friends a quick but awkward hug as they kept walking. "The thing is now... how do I let him down?"_

"_Just tell him you're flattered and everything, but you're not interested. Oh! Or, or, or that you're just not looking for a relationship right now" Willow smiled brightly at Buffy, happy with her suggestion. Buffy returned her smile and nodded. It was definitely an idea worth considering._

Shaking herself out of her thoughts, she steeled herself for what she was about to do. She'd have to see him again. Before she knew it, and before she was reading, she was suddenly standing outside Giles' apartment, having walked there completely lost in her thoughts. Putting on a smile, she pushed the door open and strode in confidently.

"Hi, Giles" she chirped.

Giles glanced up from whatever he was reading and gave her a distracted smile and greeting. "Yes, hello, Buffy"

"So, we ready to question Mr Vamp?" she asked, placing her bag down by the side of the sofa.

Giles stood and together they entered the bathroom to begin the interrogation. After only a few questions, Spike began refusing to answer unless he got fed. Giles sighed and went to prepare the blood. "Put it in a mug and heat it up, please Giles?" she called over her shoulder as he left.

Giles turned and gave her a confused look. "Why?"

Buffy was suddenly very interested in the tiling around his bathroom. "I just think he's more likely to give us the info we need if we're, you know, marginally nice to him" She risked a glance at her Watcher and saw the still sceptical look on his face. Feigning indifference, she shrugged. "If that doesn't work, I can always try and torture the information out of him"

Spike tried not to let her words affect him, and didn't truly believe that she'd follow through on her threat. Still, she'd been acting strangely recently, especially towards him, and he didn't want to risk facing her wrath. Just the idea of letting her near him with sharp implements made him gulp, a hint of fear showing in his blue eyes as his muscles tensed imperceptibly. Buffy missed his reaction, but Giles didn't. His own cold blue gaze travelled over the vampire, watching as the cocky bad boy facade was put back in place. Smirking slightly in satisfaction, he nodded and left them alone.

"Now, what did they look like?" she asked, facing the blonde chained in the tub once more.

"What did who look like, pet?" he asked in reply, his expression innocent.

Buffy rolled her eyes. "You know who I mean, Spike"

"Well, I dunno really. I never go' a good look at the ones 'ho caugh' me, and there wasn' anythin' special 'bout the ones in the lab. Non-descript and the like"

"So you saw their faces, but you can't describe them" she said slowly.

"Well, they were human. Two eyes each, kind of in the middle"

"Uh huh. And the lab?"

"Underground" Exasperated, he sighed and threw his hand up. At least, in as big a motion as he could considering his lack of possible movement. "I came out through an air vent. I don't know exactly where. I'm done" Averting his eyes from hers, he pouted a little a stared at the blank screen. "Put the telly on"

Giles chose that moment to enter, carrying the mug full of pig's blood and catching Spike's attention. "It's about time. Hope you got it warm enough"

Without a word, the other Brit hand the mug to his charge. She raised it and held it close enough for him to drink from. As before, he sucked up the blood greedily, drinking it down as fast as he could. Once he had finished, she handed the mug back to Giles.

"Okay, the invalid amnesiac routine is over. The kitchen is now closed until you can tell me something useful about the commandos"

The innocent look was back. "'M tryin' to remember. It was very traumatic"

His tone suggested he was joking, but Buffy's eyes softened, remembering his nightmare from before. Seeing her expression change, Spike fidgeted uncomfortably in the tub. Everything about her was unnerving him. He tried to put the walls he'd made to protect himself back up. "Wha' I wanna know is how long am I gonna live once I tell you?"

Giles sighed, finally speaking. "Look, Spike. We have no intention of killing a harmless...uh, creature...but we have to know what's been done to you. We can't let you go until we're sure that you're...impotent – "

He was cut off by Spike's indignant cry of "Hey!"

Giles held back the urge to laugh, both at the word he'd used, knowing it would provoke Spike, and the resulting reaction from the blonde. "Sorry, poor choice of words. Until we're sure you're...you're –"

He was once again cut off. She knew she was being mean, but she didn't mean it, and she couldn't help it. It was just lying there. "Flaccid?" she offered cheerily.

Spike's eyes flashed to hers. "You are one step away, missy" he warned.

"Giles, help! He's going to scold me" she teased, smiling at him to let him know she wasn't being serious.

Unfortunately, Spike had interpreted her smile to be condescending. What right did she have to be making fun of him? People had been doing that for too long. It was one of the reasons he'd been turned, and he wasn't about to suffer the same fate twice. He growled at her and lunged, only to be held back by the chains holding him. Buffy didn't even flinch away from him at his sudden movement. In fact, she moved even closer.

"You know what? I don't think you want us to let you go. Maybe we made it a little too comfy in here for you" she teased. Something was niggling at her, telling her to stop, but she fell into the naturally bantering her and Spike had always been so good at.

"Comfy?" he retorted sarcastically. "I'm chained in a bathtub drinkin' pig's blood from a novelty mug. Doesn't rank huge in the Zagut's Guide"

She leant closer still, until she was only just out of his reach. "You want something nicer?" she tilted her head to the side, exposing the smooth, creamy skin of her neck. "Look at my... poor neck? All bare and tender and exposed... all that blood just ... pumping away..." she said, her voice slow and seductive.

Spike strained forward slightly, feeling the gold in his eyes as they fixated on the pulse point between her neck and shoulder. He could see it jumping, hear her blood rushing through her body and smell the blood that lingered just below the surface, waiting for him to sink her fangs into. It made his gums itch and his demon roar just thinking about. And God, she was so close. His eyes darkened as he fought the desire to morph and attempt to drink from her, knowing it would only cause him more pain in the long run, for more reasons than one.

Giles watched the immature display and rolled his eyes, turning to leave again. "Oh, please" he muttered.

"Giles, make her stop" Spike practically pleaded, the use of the Watcher's given name not escaping his notice. Yet, he couldn't bring himself to care. Instead, he walked through to the living room, still mumbling under his breath. "If those two don't kill each other soon, I might lend a hand"

Willow had heard most of what had transpired, and what she'd missed, Giles had filled her in when he went to the kitchen to get blood for Spike. He'd then returned to the questioning, which had yet to improve by the sounds of things, making her more confident in her idea. "What about a truth spell? I'm not positive it would work on a vampire, but we could try. Make him fess up?"

Giles dropped his gaze and sighed. "A truth spell, of course. Why didn't I think of that?"

"'Cause you had your hand full with the undead English Patient?" she asked, her voice falsely bright.

Giles accepted the book she offered to him and nodded with a faint smile. "Yes... we'll have a go"

Willow smiled slightly. "Looks pretty simple. I'll stop by the magic shop tomorrow"

"Excellent"

Willow nodded. "Alright, I'll be back in the morning with doughnuts and motherwort" She raised her voice so she could be clearly heard in the adjoining room. "Bye, Buffy! I'll see you at home"

After receiving the reply from her roommate, Willow turned and gave Giles another small smile before leaving quietly. Neither of them had noticed Buffy slip back out of the bathroom and return just as silently.

* * *

Once Giles had left, Buffy had stopped teasing the bound vampire. She had grinned at him unrepentantly though, both of them just staring at the other, the hostility in his against the humour in hers. She watched in fascination as the hard edge to his eyes faded and he relaxed, leaning back against the tub again. They fell into an uncomfortable silence, Buffy shuffled her weight nervously and looking everywhere but him. Spike, on the other hand, kept his eyes on her, watching her curiously, much as he had down in the past few days when he'd seen her.

_Wha' is goin' on with this bloody bint? First she's normal, then nice, then violent... I jus' can' get a read on 'er_ he thought, his frustration building. His dark brows drew together in a frown as he contemplated the silent blonde girl before him.

"What?" she asked, feeling his eyes on her.

"You feelin' all righ', Slayer?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Better than fine. I'm great!"

His confusion only increased at her rushed response. Shaking his head, he figured he'd try for another blood bag. She'd been nice enough to get him another one last night after all. Hoping he was pushing his luck, he opened his mouth. "Don' suppose a bloke could get some more blood, eh luv?"

Buffy's eyes shot up to his, but instead of the firm dislike he expected to be there accompanied by a disdainful and rather forceful 'No', he got something very different. Sympathy mixed with an unbridled curiosity that could easily match his own. "How much blood do you need? You know, normally" she asked. The was no accusation in her voice, just a want for knowledge. This girl just kept on with the surprises.

"Honestly?" he asked, and she nodded. "'Cos you're not gonna like it, 'n' I don' wanna end up on the pointy end of your stake just for tellin' the truth"

Buffy drew an invisible cross over her heart. "I'm not gonna stake you"

Watching her warily for a second, he nodded. "When 'm at full strength I drain at least one person a night but, if I had to, I could still stay at m' strongest by drinkin' one every other day" he paused, searching her face for any sign of disgust or possible staking attempts. The openness of her green gaze shocked and bewildered him even more, but he carried on. "Did you know that, on average, the human body contains ten pints of blood? Now, normally, if I were to get into the state I'm in now, I'd feed on at least five people a day for at least 3 days. That's how much I need. So, yeah, I'm survivin'" he let out a low humourless chuckle. "Just. If you can even call it that" He'd looked away from her as he'd finished, unwilling to see the pity he knew would be there after her reactions before.

Buffy was speechless. She truly didn't know what to say. _Each bag of blood we buy is one pint. We never feed him more than four a day. And he's used to having ten? Then paired with the fact he hasn't fed for god knows how long, and he says he needs... one hundred and fifty pints in order to fully regain his strength? _She felt sick. She remembered how long they'd kept him tied up in some way and wondered how he'd ever managed to survive being with them. _He must have drunk so much more when he was finally allowed to wonder around Giles' freely _she thought, trying to recall if she had ended up having to buy more after that weeks or not, but she couldn't remember. Making her decision, she stood up. She left the room without a word and slipped into the kitchen.

She could hear Willow and Giles talking about a spell of some kind and, as silently as she could, she grabbed a few more bags out of the fridge. Placing them all in the microwave, she turned it on. Knowing she couldn't stay there for much longer without Giles seeing her, though why she was hiding from him she didn't know, she took them out and placed them on a tray, along with his mug and straw. As quietly as she had exited, she entered the room and closed the door behind her.

Spike looked up, having retreated into his thoughts after he assumed that her abrupt departure meant she wouldn't be coming back. Yet she had returned, and brought a small pile of blood bags with her. She kneeled beside him with an uncertain smile. "They're not as warm as the others, but I had to get out of there before Giles saw me"

She lifted one of the bags and held it out. She saw him hesitate to take it, and before he changed and bit into it, she could have sworn she saw gratitude there. He gulped it down greedily, draining the bag dry in a few seconds. She placed the now empty bag on the floor beside her and lifted another, which he drained just as fast. After she had fed him four of the bags, she lifted the last one, only to hear Willow yell through her goodbyes.

She held the bag away from him when he went to bite into it. He growled lowly at her, but she ignored it.

"Bye!" she shouted in reply. "I need you to just open it. I forgot the scissors" she added quietly.

Spike stared at her incredulously, but nicked the corner of it with his fang as she asked. He watched then as she poured the contents into the mug, then slide the tray and the empty plastic behind the bath. She jumped back up onto the side of the tub, put the straw in the mug and leant forwards do he could drink from it just as Giles walked through the door.

* * *

The bleached blonde stayed silent, watching for a reaction in the other man. _I sound like a soddin' broken record, but wha' the bloody hell is goin' on here? Slayer's feedin' me more blood and not lettin' 'er Watcher know?_ Deciding for know to not look a gift horse in the mouth, he continued drinking the blood held in the hand of his enemy, feeling the effects of the blood he'd consumed surging through him. He felt stronger already, his senses coming back to him and his remaining wounds heal. Flexing experimentally, he could feel the energy burning in his muscles. _Best not let them know that though, mate._

Giles didn't seem to notice anything amiss, and Buffy let out the breath she didn't know she'd been holding. She knew she could rationalise her actions to him, but she also knew that he wouldn't exactly be happy about it and would likely present rational arguments against what she'd done too. She could just imagine the anger and disappointment aimed at her. Still, she straightened her back and steeled herself. She didn't need her Watcher anymore. Yes, she still needed Giles, he was the closest person she had to a father anymore. But she didn't need his guidance. She was her own Slayer now, and she prepared to tell him her thoughts.

But she was distracted by what he said next. "Um, Willow may have had a very helpful idea. She seems to be coping better with Oz's departure, don't you think?" He turned to the blonde couple only to face identical looks of disbelief.

"Are you kidding?" Buffy asked. She knew she'd been blind to her friend's pain before, but hindsight is usually twenty-twenty. "That's her brave face"

"Are you blind? She's hangin' on by a thread. Any ninny can see that" Spike added. Buffy felt the blush of embarrassment tinge her cheeks and turned her face away, hiding from the two Englishmen. _He was always so perceptive. I mean, he never even saw Willow and he could see what the rest of us didn't. Or maybe we did, and we just chose to ignore it_ she thought sadly.

She stood and handed the cup to Giles. Without trying to hide what she was doing, she picked up the tray and plastic bags. She'd changed her mind, and it was time for her to take charge. _I'm a leader? Well watch me lead. _"I'm gonna go check on Wills. Giles, please remember that Spike needs at least..." she paused, looking to the vampire in question.

He wondered how far he could push his luck, but decided to go with a number he felt she was likely to agree with. "Eight" he answered firmly.

"Eight bags of blood a day. More would be good though" she finished, remembering his comment about how much blood was in a human body. And strangely enough, it didn't weird her out at all.

Giles was staring at her like she'd suddenly stated she was getting married to Bob Dole and planned to raise penguins in Guam. "Buffy, are you aware – " he started in the tone that always used to make her feel like a little girl again.

"Yes, Giles. I am fully aware that there is a one hundred and..." she paused, looking him over and guessing the age he was turned. She'd read all the books she could find about him after the incident in Sunnydale, but there was still nothing on who he used to be. "forty... six... ish..." she frowned and shrugged, not noticing the grin on the vampire's face at her attempts to guess how old he really was. "Master vampire chained in your bathtub. I am also aware that he is not at full strength, he's not a threat to us in his current position and – " she emphasised, seeing Giles was about to interrupt. "I am also the Slayer. If he does manage to escape, I'll catch him. It's not up for discussion, Giles. Eight" her tone signalled it was the end of the conversation as she spun on her heel and stalked out, leaving a stunned Watcher and bewildered but amused vampire in her wake.

"How, exactly, did she go from threatening to stake you to telling me to feed you more so you may recuperate more efficiently?" Giles asked after he recovered.

"No idea, mate. But 'm not complainin'"

"No, I don't suppose you would" With that, Giles left, wondering what on Earth had gotten into his Slayer and leaving Spike in the silence of the bathroom, taking the mug with him.

* * *

When Buffy returned to the dorm, she found the distraught Willow lying on her bed, curled up in a ball of pain. "Oh, Wills" Buffy kneeled down beside her bed and stroked a stray strand of red hair behind her friend's ear.

"Devon said that he sent for his stuff. I guess that means he's planning on settling down somewhere... else. Not here" Willow told her, her voice thick with tears and emotion.

"I guess so..." Buffy said quietly, unsure as to how she could comfort her friend.

"I feel like I've been split down the centre and... half of me is lost" she tried to explain, choking back more tears.

"I know it feels like that now..." Oh, God did she know. One hundred and forty seven days of pure torment. She trailed off, feeling the familiar agony in her chest and fighting it back, fighting her own pain as she attempted to help Willow with hers. _But how? What can I possibly say to make this better?_

"Oz is gone" Willow whimpered, a fresh wave of tears filling her eyes, the bitter and salty drops overflowing to spill down her cheeks, physical evidence of the misery inside her heart.

Buffy felt her own heart break for her friend, clinging on to the fact that she knew Tara was waiting for the redhead. _They'll be so happy together. It'll be worth it. It'll be worth it. It'll be worth it._ She kept chanting internally to herself as she wrapped her arms around the crying witch, trying to keep herself sane and convince herself of the truth held in them. She could change everything, and it'll all be worth it.

* * *

A/N: Okay, so I was going to do the entire of my version of Something Blue, but then I got writing and decided to split it into parts. This seemed like a good place to stop seeing as it'll then be the night of the spell. She'll cast it near the beginning, and then hilarity ( and hopefully happiness ) will ensue =)

So, thank you for reading, and you know the drill =)


	7. Something Different?

A/N: I think by now, the disclaimer and summary are in the obvious place lol, so I'm not gonna put it at the top of every chapter, though I may occasionally do a "So far in BtHLaL..." :)

Okay, so let me start by once again thanking the wonderful readers, and the reviewers. mat528, Carol and Sailor Sayuri, you guys already know how great you are, but I'm gonna tell you that you're great anyway =)

mat528: Thanks for letting me know about the 'blonde' 'blond' thing =D When I looked it up, it said something about direct and indirect uses or something, and another site said one was american and one was english, so I didn't know. I figured either was correct. So thanks for clearing that up for me, you're awesome =) Oh, and I hope this chapter isn't too much of a rehash, I just loved this episode so I wanted to try and keep it as similar as possible :D

And I'm running out of smiley's, so on with the story XD

* * *

Chapter 7 : Something... Different?

Buffy met with Riley early the next day, now secure in the knowledge that if she were to change certain events, it wouldn't be the end of the world. Well, most likely anyway. Shoving apocalyptic type thoughts into the back of her mind, she smiled at the psychology teaching assistant, glancing at the basket and blanket he held in his hands.

_He looks so... excited. God, how am I gonna do this?_ Riley may have paid vampires to bite him and left town after giving her an ultimatum only to return not even a year later with his wife, but he didn't remember doing that. She couldn't blame this Riley for the mistakes they'd make in the future, should she continue to see him. But she wasn't going to. _Now, how to let him down gently..._

* * *

Willow had woken and showered, gone to class and dutifully taken notes before going to the library to work on a paper. But she had done it all feeling numb, empty. She'd cried all night previously until she was sure there were no tears left within her. The pain was gone, for now, instead leaving the redhead feeling lost and hollow. She went about her daily routine as she would any other day, but she did it monotonously, her energy having deserted her.

Buffy said she understood her pain, and she knew logically that she did. Willow had seen the blonde after Angel's departure, seen how it had torn her apart leaving her emotionally broken for so long. It seemed that she was only really just recovering now. So yes, she knew that Buffy knew how she felt. Logically. But she wasn't thinking logically. After all, if her friend truly understood, truly knew, then how could she leave her to deal with it alone?

Holding back the tears that began to build once more, Willow clutched the books she held to her chest and wondered through the campus alone. She was always alone now. And it hurt so much.

* * *

Giles removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose, his eyes squeezed tightly shut.

"Come on, now! It's telly time!" yelled a familiar and increasingly irritating voice. Spike had been shouting almost nonstop every since he woke up, and at times, through the night as well.

He'd barely slept and he was feeling more aggravated by the minute. _This really is getting ridiculous. Where is Willow? _He picked up the phone with a sigh and dialled the number that Buffy had left him for their dorm. Unfortunately, he got the answering machine.

The recording of Buffy's voice sounded down the line. "This is Buffy and Willow. We're not in right now, so please leave a message"

"Oh, uh, Willow..." _Damn. I hate speaking to these dreadful things._ "... It's Giles. Umm, I thought you were bringing the ingredients for that spell? I really have to – "

Giles cringed as Spike's voice interrupted him. "'Passions' is on! Timmy's down the bloody well, and if you make me miss it, I'll – "

Giles felt his temper snap. Turning towards the bathroom, he yelled back. "You'll do what? Lick me to death?"

He took a few deep breaths as he replaced his glasses, listening to Spike as he rattled against his chains. Glancing up to the ceiling for a moment and praying silently for strength, he returned the phone to his ear. "Look, uh, Willow. I think we ought to try the spell. Among other things, I'd like to shower sometime today" He sent a menacing but unseen glare in the direction of the vampire. "Alone" he added almost angrily, hanging the phone up with probably more force than was necessary.

Attempting to keep his calm disposition in place, he picked up another blood bag to warm and feed to Spike. He still couldn't figure out why Buffy had said to increase his amount when he was quite clearly surviving on the previous amount. _Whatever her reasons are, they're beyond me. That girl's brain really is a mystery._ Still, he trusted her and her judgement, so he'd do as she asked. Unless, of course, he felt that it would result in Spike becoming a threat to them.

* * *

Buffy sat on the blanket, indulging Riley in polite conversation but not really hearing what he was saying to her. She picked at the food on offer, but she'd lost her appetite knowing what she was going to have to do. It would hurt him, and she didn't want to do that. She knew it had to be done though. Her head snapped up as he said something, looking to her for a response.

"You weren't listening, were you?" Riley asked, a grin on his face but his disappointment shining in his eyes.

"Yeah! I mean, yes. I was. You were talking about..." her voice trailed off as she tried to rack her brain. _What was he saying?_

"Driving" he supplied, dropping his gaze from hers.

"I'm sorry, Riley. I'm all Daydream Buffy. But look! I'm all ears. Please, continue" she reassured him, giving him her full attention.

"I was just saying, I like driving for fun"

She gave him a look. "Seriously?"

"Well, not four-wheeling or anything, but yeah. Don't you?" he asked, suddenly feeling a little insecure.

"Actually, no-wheeling is more my specialty. I'm an avid pedestrian" she replied cheerily.

"You're kidding, right? I mean, you know how to drive"

Buffy frowned. _So what if I can't drive? Is it really that important? _"Well, I took the class. Cars and Buffy are, like... un-mixy things" she said, trying to keep her tone light.

"It's just because you haven't had a good experience yet – "

Buffy cut him off. "No, I just... can't drive. I drove my Mom's car up the road to the store once and managed to put a dent in it. It's not exactly something I'm proud of" she told him, ducking her head slightly.

"But you can have the best time in a car. It's not about getting somewhere. You have to take your time. Forget about everything. Just... relax. Let it wash over you. The air... motion... just, let it roll" his voice got quieter as he leaned closer to her.

_This guy really doesn't give up, does he? _Luckily, she was saved from having to reply by the sight of Willow walking across the grass some way away from them. It looked like she was heading towards them, but Buffy saw her opportunity and took it. Looking back to the man next to her, she realised he'd leaned even closer, and looked as if he were about to kiss her. _It's better sooner than later. If I let this continue, I'll be leading him on, and that'll only hurt him worse._

Buffy placed a hand on his chest and pushed him back. He gave her a confused look. "Buffy, what...?"

"I'm sorry, Riley, but..." She sighed. "You're a great guy, really, and I had a nice time... but, I just don't... I'm not..." she stammered, trying to think of the best way to say 'Hey, you're really nice and everything but I just happen to be in love with a vampire who hates me right now'.

Riley leant back, his eyes hardening a little. "It's okay, I get it" He paused for a moment. "No, wait. I don't"

"What?"

"Why'd you agree to this, Buffy? If you knew you weren't ready, or that I'm not the right guy, or whatever it is you're trying to say" his voice was rising slightly and people were starting to look in their direction.

"Because... I thought..."

"You know what? Maybe Parker was right about you" He stood and began collecting up the various items around them. "Can't believe I fell for it" he mumbled, putting containers haphazardly back into the basket he'd prepared.

Buffy's mouth opened and closed silently a few times. _Maybe Parker was _right_? Maybe _Parker _was right?_ Reigning in her anger, she stood as well, and placed a gentle hand on his arm and causing him to freeze in his actions. "Riley, I'm sorry, but – "

"Yeah, well... so am I" He shrugged off her touch and picked up the blanket and basket before turning and walking away from her.

Buffy ran a hand through her hair and watched as Willow slowly approached her, having paused whilst watching the small scene. She felt bad about what had happened to Riley, but in the long run, they'd both be happier. _Always in the long run. What about now?_ She thought sadly. Putting a bright smile on her face, she greeted the redhead with a hug.

"Hey" she said softly. Willow just smiled in response. Buffy tried again. "Is everything okay?"

"Everything's fine. Same" she replied dully.

Buffy put her arm gently around her and guided her back to the dorm. "Let's go have a party with those two cool guys. You know, Ben and Jerry" She got a small grin from Willow and considered it a small victory.

* * *

"Hey, I'm gonna go meet Xander and Anya at the Bronze in an hour. Wanna come with?" Buffy nudged her friend playfully.

Willow tried to smile back. "I don't know, Buffy. I don't really feel like putting on my happy face, you know?"

Buffy stroked the redhead's hair gently. "Yeah, Wills. I know"

"Have a good time though"

Buffy smiled. "Thanks" She stood and made her way to the shared bathroom to shower. Exactly one hour later she was clean, dressed up and ready to go.

"See you later" she called over her shoulder as she headed out the door.

"Yep" Willow replied quietly.

Buffy fought the feeling that she should stay with the troubled witch. She'd made her decision, and she had to stick by it. If Willow was to perform the spell, she needed to do everything as she had before. Shaking off the strange feelings, she held her head high and strode confidently towards the club.

Inside the dorm, Willow stood and got ready herself. She too had made a decision. The pain was too much, as there was only one way she knew how to block it out, and Buffy wouldn't know until it was too late.

* * *

Xander, Anya and Buffy sat around a table at the Bronze, nursing their drinks and watching the people dance as Buffy filled the other two in on the recent events.

"Geez, you mean Oz just sent for his stuff and didn't even call her? That's pretty harsh" Xander's eyes were full of sympathy for his best friend.

"I only wish I had my powers back. I'd liquefy his entrails for her" Anya added.

Xander turned to Anya, rubbing her hand affectionately with his own. "That's sweet" He turned back to Buffy and continued. "God, poor Will. No wonder she's..." he glanced towards the dancefloor just in time to see a familiar head, shining as bright and flames under the lights of the club. "... having a wonderful time" he finished, his eyes never leaving her.

Buffy turned her head to follow Xander's line of sight, her eyes widening in surprise when she saw Willow. "Wow. Way to re-bound" She turned to the other two. "But she said she wasn't coming out tonight"

"Guess she changed her mind" Anya shrugged and took a sip of her drink.

"I believe that is the dance of a brave little toaster" Xander sighed, worry joining the sympathy in his gaze.

Willow saw them then and waved, making her way over. "Hey, guys, c'mon! This music's great!" she exclaimed happily, a big grin curving her lips. It was the happiest they'd seen her since Oz had left.

"It's nice to see you brought your boogie shoes tonight, Will" he quipped, watching her closely.

"Yeah. I, I know I've been sort of a party-poop lately, so I said to myself, 'Self!' I said, 'It's time to shake and shimmy it off'" she stated proudly, nodding at the group.

"Sounds like a good policy" Buffy said, also watching her friend. She remembered what happened next and glanced at the jacket on a nearby chair. _How did I not notice that?_ She thought, inwardly frowning. _Guess I must have gotten more caught up in everything than I thought._

"Yeah! And it works, too. You know, I figure, in the grand scheme of things, we're all just..." She didn't notice as her words began to slur together a little. Instead, she picked up her jacket, trailing off when the bottle of beer she'd placed under it and forgotten about fell to the floor. Hurriedly, she bent down to grab it.

"Drunk?" Buffy finished for her.

Willow laughed nervously, shuffling on her feet as her hands played with the now almost empty bottle. "Drunk. I mean, that's such a, a strong word. Kind of a... guttural... Anglo-Saxon word. Drunk"

Xander's concern grew exponentially when he spotted what she was holding and heard what Buffy said. "Will, so not lovin' the drowning of the sorrows" he tried lightly. _I already lost my parents to alcohol. Please don't do this to me as well, Wills._

"Not drowning..." Her brow furrowed in thought for a second. "Wading. A-a-and see? Light" She indicated the label on the bottle she still held, clasped tightly in her hands. "No big"

"No big? Anyone remember when Buffy had the fun beer-fest and went one-million years B.C.?" _You know, when I drank that enchanted beer four years ago _she thought to herself with a silent snicker. _This is gonna get really weird, really fast._ Then she frowned imperceptibly. _Well, weirder. 'Cos God knows this is seriously wiggy already._

She almost missed Xander's comment as he glanced to her, his eyes briefly dropping to her chest before they snapped up again. "Sadly without the fuzzy bikini"

"Off topic, Xander" Anya reprimanded him.

"Right. Topic now" He stood and walked around the table towards Willow, trying to ignore the fact that she stepped away from him slightly. "Will, how about you give me that beer?"

Willow tightened her grip on the bottle and held it even closer to herself as if she could stop Xander from taking it from her that way. "No! Why should I? I've got pain here, big time legitimate pain"

"We all have pain, Will" he said, hoping he could reach her still.

"Oh, like what? 'Oh, poor me. I live in a basement.' Yeah, that's dire" she mocked, rolling her eyes.

Xander reeled back like he'd been slapped. _She's just drunk, man, she doesn't know what she's saying._ He tried to convince himself of that, but he felt that maybe, just maybe, she did know what she was saying. He was beginning to doubt that he even knew who she was anymore. Shaking his head, he walked back to his seat without a reply. Buffy observed the exchange, watching sadly as Xander returned to his seat. Standing, she went to Willow's side, who seemed completely unfazed by the harsh words she'd said.

"Okay, you know what? That's it, I'm taking you home" she said, her voice low and gentle, but firm all the same. Grasping her friend's upper arm in the same gentle but firm manner, she began to lead Willow outside.

But the redhead refused to move and pulled her arm away. "No, I don't want to" She'd managed to get this tipsy without Buffy's knowledge, and she wasn't going to let her stop her from getting completely drunk. She had to block out the pain, and this was the only way.

"Well, you'll thank me when you still have a friend in the morning" Buffy cast a glance to her brunette friend still sitting next to Anya. _I need to talk to her at some point actually..._ she thought absently, her hand closing around Willow's arm once more.

"I just can't stand feeling this way. I want it to be over" she whined, the burn of tears stinging the back of her eyes again.

"It will. I promise. But it's gonna take time" Buffy assured her quietly.

"Well, that's not good enough" Willow stated defiantly.

"I know" Buffy dropped her gaze and her hand.

"Well, isn't there some way I can just make it go away? Just 'cause I say so? Can't I just make it go poof?"

Buffy looked up again and gave her small smile. "Let's get back, okay?" she said, not expanding anymore. _She must have cast the spell as soon as I fell asleep. I guess that's when she'll cast it this time too._

Willow nodded, and this time offered no resistance to the gentle hand that guided her back to her dorm.

* * *

True to Buffy's thoughts, though unknown to the witch, Willow climbed out of bed as soon as Buffy's breaths even out to a slow rhythm and she was sure she wouldn't wake the blonde. As quietly as she could, she opened her chest and retrieved the items and ingredients she needed. Once she had everything piled in her arms, she carefully slipped out of the dorm and to the bathroom.

She placed the red candles she'd brought in a large circle and placed the tray of herbs to one side where they could be easily reached from within. She sat in the middle of the circle, and quickly drew a pentacle in front of her with her chalk before placing a bowl on top of it in its centre. Next she picked up the goblet and placed it in front of the pentacle. Then she picked up the incense holder and placed that in position too. The final step of preparation was to light the candles and incense, which she did using a lighter she'd bought for such purposes.

Taking a few deep, calming breaths, she picked up a few of the bottles she'd selected and poured a small amount from each into the goblet as the book she'd also brought with her described. Breathing slowly and deeply, she began to chant. Her voice was shaky at first, but she gained confidence as she spoke.

"Harken all ye elements, I summon thee now" She picked up a few of the herbs and dropped them into the bowl. "Control the outside, control within" she paused for a moment, feeling the magic build within her. "Land and sea, fire and wind. Out of my passions, a web be spun. From this eve forth, my will be done. So mote it be"

She picked up the goblet and carefully poured the contents over the mix of herbs in the bowl. As she placed the goblet down again, shocks of blue electricity shot between each candle and her body, connecting her to them. The flames flickered and flared, they're yellow heat almost scorching the ceiling. As unexpectedly as they stretched, they went out, extinguishing to leave just smoke billowing around the weakened redhead and dissipating as she passed out in the darkened room.

When she finally awoke, hours had passed. As quickly as she could, she collected her things and returned to the dorm. Replacing the items into storage and satisfied that she hadn't woken Buffy, she tiredly slipped under the covers of her bed, asleep before her head even hit the pillow.

* * *

The next day did not go well for Willow. The spell she had performed hadn't worked, leaving her as heartbroken as she had been the day before. Not only that, but Giles had been by because she forgot to go by and cast the truth spell on Spike. _So I forgot one lousy spell and suddenly I'm incompetent? I'm off, and yeah, a bit emotional right now, but that doesn't mean I can't do it._

"I mean, I'm going through something. I just don't see why he was getting down on me" she explained to Buffy when she had returned from class to find an upset but angry redhead.

"Giles just worries. Spells can be dangerous. It doesn't mean he thinks you're a bad witch" _Wonky, powerful, scary, a goddess and occasionally evil, but not bad_ she added silently.

"I am a bad witch" Willow said miserably.

"No, you're a good witch" Buffy contradicted her.

"I'm not kidding anyone. If I had any real power, I could have made Oz stay with me"

"Will, you wouldn't have wanted him to have stayed – "

Willow interrupted her, speaking as if she hadn't heard Buffy say anything. "And I didn't have the guts to do the spell on Veruca, and my "I Will it So" spell went nowhere. The only real witch here is fuzzy little Amy" She ran her hand softly over the fur of the rat she held in her hand before placing her on the bed behind her so she could continue cleaning her cage.

"I think you're being a too hard on yourself" _Way, way hard, 'cos I don't ever remember Amy being a goddess _or_ having the power to destroy the world._

"She's got access to powers I can't even invoke" _Yet_ Buffy replied in her head. "I mean, first, she's a perfectly normal girl" Behind them, there was a flash as the rat morphed back into the girl they had once known. Amy smiled in relief and opened her mouth to say something, but Willow beat her to it. "Then poof, she's a rat" Amy turned bewildered eyes to the back of Willow's head just as the world around her grew and she morphed back into the rat she had turned herself into.

"I could never do something like that" Willow finished glumly, oblivious to the changes that had occurred as she went back to cleaning the cage again.

At that moment, the phone rang and Buffy stood to answer it. "Hello?" She paused, listening to whoever was on the other end. "Uh, I'll be right there" She replaced the phone and picked up her jacket. "Spike escaped" she said shortly.

Willow looked up, her eyes dimming even more when she saw that Buffy was leaving. "A-and you're going? Now?"

"Sorry, duty thing" Buffy shrugged and grabbed a few stakes, though she knew she wouldn't need them.

"Well, I mean, what's the rush? Spike can't hurt anyone, right? And I figured since I'm kinda grieve-y, would could, uh, you know, have a girl's night. We could eat sundaes and watch Steel Magnolias and you can tell me how, at least I don't have diabetes" she implored hopefully.

"Will, I can't hang out with you until I get Spike back to Giles, you know that. Okay, I'll be back as soon as I can. I promise" Buffy opened the door and left the dorm, not hearing the last thing Willow muttered as she sighed and accepted she'd be spending the evening alone.

"I don't see the big. He's probably just standing out there. You could find him in two seconds" Something flickered in her green eyes, making them glow supernaturally for a moment before returning to their normal colour. Completely unaware to the effects of her spell, Willow turned back to the cage.

* * *

Buffy stalked outside the dorm and began to walk across the lawns towards Restfield cemetery. IT was the closest and the place where Spike had stayed before. Or would do. Buffy shook her head and kept walking. So, he might not be there, seeing as he hadn't yet, but it was her best shot. She glanced down for a second as she double checked the stakes she had on her. When she looked up again, she missed a step, stumbling slightly to a surprised stop. She looked confusedly at the vampire stood in front of her as he spun around in a circle and gave her a similar look.

"Thought that was gonna take longer" she said without thinking. Then she remembered how she'd bumped into him before, though she'd never found out how that had happened.

"Me too. Must've got... turned around..." he replied, his eyes still flicking about his surroundings. Buffy watched him carefully as he seemed to search for something, his eyes scanning the buildings and ground. "Hang, hang on... this... this is it. Wait" he glanced up to a tree nearby. "No" he looked back to the floor at his feet before looking around again. "Yes"

"What are you talking about?" Buffy asked curiously, folding her arms across her chest.

"The lab. Commando lab. The door was right here where I escaped" he explained.

Buffy looked down at the ground where he was pointing. "I don't think so" she said incredulously. _I never did find out where that door was__._

Spike fell to his knees and began tearing at the ground, pulling up lumps of grass and dirt. "Open up! I'm gonna kill you!" he yelled.

"Spike" Buffy's eyes widened and she placed a hand on his shoulder, but he shrugged it off and kept digging fruitlessly.

"Let me in! Fix me" his anger faded and he let his arms fall to his side, dejection in every line of his body.

"Spike" she said softly, again grasping his arm and trying to lift him from the floor.

"Get off" he growled, but she didn't let go, holding his arm firmly. Frustrated rage exploded within him and he punched her in the nose, sending her stumbling backwards.

Buffy's hands flew to her face, holding her nose as she fought the urge to punch him back. Instead she watched as his own hands flew to his head, clasping it in agony as he howled out his pain. The blonde flinched at the sound, feeling it pierce her heart. Eventually he recovered and gave her a wary look, obviously expecting her to retaliate.

Sniffing, Buffy gingerly touched her nose. _Phew, not broken_ she thought in relief. _Still sore though._ Locking eyes with him, she just stared at him for a moment before speaking. "I was just gonna ask you if you think it's below the campus. But first I had to stop you from scrabbling in the dirt like a dog burying a bone. And what do I get for being nice for once? A punch in the face. Real nice, Spike" She glared at him, a little shocked to see him actually duck his head slightly and give her an apologetic look.

"Now, are you gonna go back to Giles' without a fight, or am I gonna have to tie you up?" She rolled her eyes when her leered at her, holding up a hand to stop his comment. "Save it, Spike. Or am I gonna have to gag you as well?" Buffy closed her eyes briefly for a second. _I just keep walking straight into them, don't I?_

"So, pet, did you wanna tie me up now or wait until we get back to your Watcher's?" he asked with a smirk. Buffy grabbed his arm without replying and began dragging him back towards Giles' apartment.

* * *

After Buffy had left to find Spike, Willow had decided to visit Xander. Perhaps he would be there for her like a friend should.

"I mean, I'm going through something. You'd think every once in awhile Buffy would make best friends a priority" she ranted as she paced the small room.

"You know, Will, it's not like she could just let Spike go" Xander responded from his position on the end of his bed, getting slightly dizzy from the constant movement of his distressed friend.

"Spike's more important than me. I get it" she said sullenly.

"Buffy's gotta find out what's up with those commandos. Right now she needs Spike" he explained rationally.

"Well, fine, why doesn't so just go marry him?" she replied sarcastically. She turned to pace another short length, facing away from Xander so he missed the flicker of magic deep within her eyes, the swirl of power as she unknowingly activated her spell again. "It's just not fair"

"Willow, I know it's hard to see it right now, but everything you're feeling is because of you and Oz. Not because of Buffy and me or anybody. But eventually you'll meet somebody else, and it'll be better"

"Yeah, 'cause most relationships are great and trouble-free. I don't think so. I think we're all doomed to badness"

"We're not doomed" _I have to believe that. We've gotta get a happy ending at some point... right?_

"Oh, yeah? Let's, let's look at your bio. Insect Lady, Mummy Girl, Anya..." Xander lowered his eyes. "You're a demon magnet" she concluded, his eyes shooting up, but not before the strange light once again lit her eyes.

Hurt blossomed in his own chocolate brown gaze. "I was just trying to help"

"I'm sorry" she apologised quietly before turning and making her way back up the stairs and leaving Xander's house.

* * *

At about the same time as Willow arrived at Xander's, Buffy was pushing Spike through the door to Giles' apartment. He's done nothing but wind her up all the way there, eventually making her tie him up just to try and annoy him a bit. Unfortunately, he'd been undeterred and continued to talk away at her. _How is it that he's always known just what buttons to push?_ She thought exasperatedly.

"Hey, watch it!" Spike shouted as she almost pushed him off balance. He stumbled forward into the apartment, then turned and straightened, glaring at the petite girl that was so much stronger than him.

"One more word out of you and I swear – " she warned, getting closer to him.

He leaned down, bringing their faces even closer. "Swear, what? You're not gonna do anything to me. You don't got the stones" he taunted her.

Buffy leaned even closer, their noses mere inches apart. "Oh, I got the stones. I got a whole bunch of... stones" she ground out, her frustration at the blond vampire not reducing the effect his closeness had. Her heartbeat increased and her breathing hitched as she felt desire begin to burn through her.

"Yeah? You're all talk" Spike bluffed.

Buffy gave him a smug smile. "Giles! I accidentally killed Spike. That's okay, right?" she yelled.

She only just heard his faint reply. "Uh...uh...um... just a minute" he stuttered.

A small part of her brain registered that there must be something wrong with her Watcher, but all her focus was on the black clad man that was oh so close to her, her brain fogging in a haze of lust. She shook herself slightly, trying to fight it, but from the smirk on his handsome face she knew she'd been caught out. He could smell the desire on her, and he knew exactly how he affected her. She pushed him down into a chair and glared at him, attempting to quell the fire within her, the electricity that jumped over her skin. _It's been too long. God, I need to touch him, I need to know he's real. _The still functioning part of her brain helped her out. _But if you make him suspect something now, you have no idea how it's gonna end. You have to wait, be patient. _Patience had never been one of her virtues, but she managed to calm herself and restrain the fingers that wanted to run through his platinum hair and release the soft curls she knew were held back in that gel, to trace his features that she'd not been able to touch or admire for what felt like a lifetime, to relearn the shape of his body and feel him respond to her. _Woah, Buffy, calm down. I doubt he'll appreciate you attacking him, or declaring you love for him right now, so. Just. Wait._

Spike seemed unaware of the inner turmoil within the Slayer as her mind and heart conflicted over him. He sneered at her and spoke in a low and deadly tone. "I get this chip out, they'll be finding your body for weeks"

Buffy raised her eyebrow and looked over him from head to toe, letting her eyes glide slowly and seductively over him. He shivered at her look and felt himself responding even as his brain yelled at his body not to. "What make you think you can take me?"

_What the hell has gotten into me? _Buffy thought frantically.

_What the bloody hell has gotten into her?_ Thought Spike in confusion. She'd knocked him off balance with her sudden mood swing, but he couldn't deny the heat that flooded his entire being at her burning gaze. _Maybe it's not such a bad thing..._ he shook his head with an inaudible growl._ Snap out of it, mate! How many times? She. Is. The. Slayer!_

He opened his mouth to reply, though what he was going to say, he didn't know. What he did say, however, was the last thing he expected to come out of his mouth. Yet it seemed so... _right_. Before he had a chance to rethink about any of it, he'd stood and turned so his back was to Buffy. "Untie me, please, luv?" he asked. In a split second, the ropes around him had vanished, slipping to the floor discarded and unnoticed. He sat Buffy in the chair he'd been in and dropped to one knee.

He felt nervous as he met her eyes. This was the woman he loved with everything he was and he could only hope that she'd give him the answer he wanted, the answer he needed. Working the ring from his finger, he kept his blue eyes locked on her teary and stunned green ones and took a deep shaky breath.

"Buffy Anne Summers. Would you do me the honour... of becoming my wife?"

* * *

A/N: I wanted to try and get the whole 're-episode' in this chapter, but in the end, it was just impossible without making it ridiculously long. So instead I've broken it up even further. The good news is though that it means I'm already over half way done with the next chapter, so I should be able to get that done and posted by Sunday at the latest really =)

So hopefully you enjoyed it, and please let me know what you think!


	8. Will's Will is Done

A/N: Carol, Sailor Sayuri, Naeara and shadow all have my thanks for their great reviews, cos, as usual, they've definitely helped motivate me to write quicker =)

Naeara: It's great to hear from you again :D Thanks for your reviews, as I'm sure I've said before, it's definitely an ego boost to know everytime someone's following your fic lol ;) I hope you had fun skiing!

One thing about this chapter is that it will mostly be canon. I've added a few thoughts and things, as well as changed the scene with Riley (which I hope is plausible with the content in the last chapter). Other than that, it's not gonna change much from the actual episode. Still, I hope you enjoy it! It was a really funny episode and I just loved everything about it, so I hope I do it justice :)

* * *

Chapter 8: Will's Will is Done

"_Buffy Anne Summers. Would you do me the honour... of becoming my wife?"_

Buffy felt her eyes tear up, she'd never felt this happy in her life. Warmth swelled in her chest as she stared into the shining blue eyes of the man she loved. She was oblivious to everything that was her and him, not noticing her Watcher's return from the bathroom or hearing what he said.

"It's just so sudden. I don't know what to say" she replied. _If I say yes, I get to spend the rest of my life with him. But... am I ready for that?_

"Just say yes, and make me the happiest man on earth" Spike tried to keep his voice steady, but he faltered a little, fearing she'd turn down his proposal. _Oh God, what if she says 'no'? I can' live withou' 'er._

He had no reason to be nervous though, as the next second, Buffy's smiled brightly. _For him, I'm ready. There is no life for me if he's not in it. _"Oh Spike! Of course it's yes!" she exclaimed, beaming with happiness. A relieved smile curved his own lips as he slid the ring onto her third finger of her left hand, pulling her into his embrace and smashing his mouth to hers.

Buffy closed her eyes, melting into his kiss, savouring the feel of his soft lips and wrapping her arms around him. Her fingers twirled the hair at the nape of his neck as her other hand pulled her fiancé closer to her and moulding her small frame to his. Breaking away to let her breathe, Spike didn't hesitate to duck his head, trailing soft kisses down her jaw and the column of her neck.

The blonde relaxed against his strong body, enjoying the feeling of his arms around her and his mouth against her skin. His skin was colder than hers but it seemed to burn everywhere her flesh met his. Glancing up, she finally saw Giles stood in the archway, gaping at the couple. Grinning widely and practically bouncing with joy, she turned glittering eyes to her Watcher. "Giles! You'll never believe what's happened!" She proudly held up her left hand, showing of the ring that adorned it.

Giles blinked and snapped back to himself. "Good Lord, what's going on?"

Buffy stepped back a little, but didn't pull out of Spike's embrace. "Spike proposed! Can you believe it?" She grinned up at the vampire who held her, and he returned it, kissing her temple affectionately.

"I'll get you a proper ring at some point, kitten. Nice big diamond that you can show off to your friends"

Buffy pouted up at him and slapped his chest. "No! I love my ring" she stated, smiling down at her left hand fondly as she fiddled with it.

"You sure? 'Cos I can get you somethin' nicer. Nothin' but the best for my girl" he said softly, smiling at the love of his life.

"Good, 'cos this ring's the best in the world"

"Why's that then, luv?"

"'Cos you gave it to me" she told him, her eyes soft with the love she felt as she leaned up to place a gentle and chaste kiss on his lips. He growled at her as she pulled away, desire darkening his eyes, but she just grinned cheekily and pulled away. "You hungry, honey?" she asked innocently.

"Mmhmm" He looked her up and down, every aspect of him screaming predator.

"Down boy" she giggled. "I'll heat you up some blood. You grab some paper and a pen and we'll start making plans"

"Okay, pet. Hurry back though" He spun her around and slapped her bottom as he pushed her in the direction of the kitchen. Buffy gasped at the contact and glared at him over her shoulder, only to see him smirking at her. Hiding her own grin, she went to get him his blood.

Giles was completely baffled. One minute he could hear them arguing and threatening to kill each other _again_ and now they were _engaged_? His vision started to blur again, the world becoming dimmer to his eyes. Removing his glasses and rubbing his tired eyes he stood and went to the phone. He dialled the number he'd used before and poured himself a scotch while he waited, watching as Buffy swept passed him with a yellow mug.

"This is Buffy and Willow. We're not in right now, so please leave a message"

"Willow, it's, it's me. Something's happened. I need your help. I can't see very well. Everything's blurred" He picked up his drink and peered around the corner. "I'm certain it's a spell of some kind, because... well... it seems something else is going wrong... horribly wrong" He took a gulp of his scotch as his charge curled up in the lap of one of the most formidable enemies she'd ever had.

Buffy handed Spike the mug and slowly lowered herself to sit in his lap. "Here you go, 98.6" Spike lifted his head to kiss her in thanks, but it immediately became more passionate. His arms wrapped automatically around her waist anchoring her to him. When her lungs burned for air, Buffy reluctantly pulled back, resting her head on his shoulder and looking at the list he'd started. Or, at least, the list he had yet to start.

"There's so much to decide. Ceremony, guests, reception..." she trailed off, lightly running a finger up and down his chest as she leant forward to nibble his earlobe. Buffy was annoyed when he seemed unaffected. He was instantly forgiven when it turned out it was wedding plans that had distracted him. _He really does want this as much as me_ she thought, sighing happily.

"Well, first thing I'd say, we're not having a church wedding" he began.

"How 'bout a daytime ceremony. In the park" Buffy suggested.

Spike raised an eyebrow and scoffed. _Is she bein' serious?_ "Fabulous. Enjoy your honeymoon with the big pile of dust"

"Under the trees. Indirect sunlight, only"

_She's gotta be kiddin'. Bloody hell, she actually means it. _"Warm breeze tosses the leaves aside, and again, you're registering as Mr and Mrs Big-Pile-of-Dust" he emphasised. _I'd do anything for the bint, but standin' in the sunlight while we take our vows? 'S bloody suicide._

"Stop it! This is our wedding and you're treating it like a big joke" Buffy stuck her bottom lip out in a pout, instantly drawing his eyes to her mouth.

"Oh, pouty! Look at that lip. Gonna get it... gonna get it..." he leant forward with a grin, following Buffy as she pulled her head back. She tried to stay mad at him, really she did, but she couldn't resist his sinister attraction, and captured his lips with her own. _Mmm, I _love_ this man. He feels so good... I wonder how far I can push him..._

She giggled and wrapped her arms around Spike's neck, pulling him closer as she wriggled in his lap. _That giggle is the most adorable noise ever, but she's gotta keep still, unless she wants to give her Watcher a show _he thought as he groaned quietly into her mouth. The feel of her warm skin burning him even through their clothes was heavenly. _So hot, so soft...'m never gonna let 'er go_ he swore silently.

"Oh, stop" she said with absolutely no conviction, bringing another grin to his face as he kissed her again and drawing another giggle from her. _Who knew the Slayer had a playful side? And God I love it. Love her._

"Yes, please stop" pleaded Giles as he kept his eyes averted from the armchair where they were situated. Unsurprisingly, they hadn't noticed his return from the kitchen, and he hadn't honestly expected them to. He took a long drink of his scotch, hoping that maybe this was all a horrible dream and he'd wake up and laugh it all off in the morning.

His voice drew Buffy out of her love induced bubble and she glanced at him. Smiling, she held her left hand out in his direction. "Giles, did you see my ring?"

"Thankfully, not well" He leant his head back against the sofa and rubbed his eyes. Buffy looked at him contemplatively for a moment before facing Spike. Giving him a questioning look, Spike understood her silent plea and nodded with a smile, urging her up with a hand on her back.

Buffy stood and went to her Watcher's side. To her father figure's side. She sat back down on the edge of the sofa, her trembling hands pressed between her knees to hide her nerves. "I'm not crazy, and I know that you probably don't approve, and my father's not that far away, I mean, he could... but this day is about family, my real family, and I would like you to be the one to give me away" she smiled at Giles and he couldn't help but be touched.

_She wants me to give her away? That's... well that's just... _He reached out and gently touched her shoulder with his fingertips. "Oh, Buffy. That's... that's so..." It seemed his speech was as coherent as his thoughts, but then he blinked hard and remembered the circumstances. "Oh! For God's sake! This is nonsense. Something is making you act this way. Don't you realize what you're doing?" he asked when he had come to his senses.

Buffy looked back at Spike with cloudy eyes, smiling brightly again. "Living the dream" she answered.

"He's gonna have to take a bit of time to get used to it, pet" he said, watching as a worried look entered her eyes.

She dropped his gaze. "They all will" She turned to Giles and continued. "But you guys weren't crazy about Angel at first either"

Spike leant forward, resting his elbows on his knees as his eyes turned stormy. "You aren't gonna say that name" he told her, hostility radiating from him.

"Sorry" she apologised. "Why don't we talk about where we're gonna register?" she suggested, eager to change the subject.

"Well, where would Angel like to register? And can we have the photographer Angel would've wanted? And, flowers Angel would have liked?" _I've lived in the Great Poof's soddin' shadow for long enough. 'M not gonna be his bloody substitute again._

_Did he really just do what I think he did?_ She felt the anger bubble up inside her. _Oh, he did not just play the jealous-of-your-ex card._ Standing, she walked to his side, fire flickering in her emerald eyes. "Hey! You think I don't live with the shadow of Drusilla over my head?" She approached him and saw his eyes soften. "That I'm not wondering if you're going to be thinking of her on our honeymoon when you're making..." she trailed off as he shook his head, her voice getting quieter. "... sweet love to me?" she finished, practically whispering as her lips met his. Apologies, love and forgiveness were all poured into the kiss, and Spike pulled her down to sit in his lap again.

"Dear Lord" Giles muttered, reaching for his glass again. Just as his fingers were about to close around it, everything went black. He heard the distinct sound of a glass falling, but he couldn't see anything.

Buffy heard the noise as well and pulled away from Spike to see what was wrong. "Giles, are you okay?" she asked in concern, trying to ignore the delicious feelings Spike was invoking as he placed feather light kisses down her throat.

"I rather think not" His voice wavered as he felt the fear rise within his chest. "I seem to be rather... rather... blind. Completely, in fact"

Buffy stood and made her way to his side, waving a hand in front of his face and looking for a reaction. "What? How could this happen?" Spike stood as well, walking to the bookcase and scanning the bindings for the title he was looking for.

"A spell, I believe" Giles answered, looking in the general direction he thought Buffy to be.

"Well, we'll fix it. Don't worry" _As long as he's okay by the wedding, everything will be fine._

Spike joined the conversation, sounding distracted as he quickly read over some of the text in one of the books. "What you want is a general reversal spell" He looked up, locking eyes with Buffy. "Gonna need supplies"

"Are you... helping me?" Giles asked dubiously.

"Well, it's almost like you're m' father-in-law, ain' it?" he replied, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. _I may be evil, but 'm not heartless_ he thought as he replaced the book after memorising the ingredients.

"See? This is how it's gonna be. Spike'll even take care of you while I'm at the magic shop" Buffy stood and walked over to Spike, who immediately folded his arms around her waist, holding her close to him. "From now on" she glanced to Giles and back to Spike, finishing her sentence sincerely, letting her eyes show him how much she loved him. "We're a family"

"Thank God I have more scotch" muttered Giles as he pulled himself to his feet and stumbled towards the kitchen.

* * *

As Buffy was leaving the magic shop, a window in a shop to her left caught her eye. Doing a double take, her eyes widened in awe of the beautiful white dresses. Slowly, she drew closer to the window, enraptured by the perfect dress as she placed her fingertips on the glass separating her from it. Completely lost, mesmerised by the layers of gorgeous lace and silk, she never noticed she'd been seen until she was pulled out of her daze by a deep voice behind her.

"Hey, Buffy" Riley wanted to avoid the blonde girl that had caught his attention, but at the same time, he was drawn to her. He had seen her exiting the magic shop and knew he had to talk to her.

Buffy whirled around at the voice. Calming slightly as she realised who it was, she relaxed but folded her arms across her chest. "Riley"

"What uh... what are you up to?" _Maybe I can get her to change her mind. Show her I can be the man she needs._

She glanced back at the dresses, a large smile immediately finding its way to her lips. "Aren't they beautiful?"

"Um, yeah... they're nice. A little dressy, maybe... for school, but..." he replied, his expression puzzled.

"Oh! You didn't hear yet, did you?" she asked, excitement lighting up her eyes.

"Hear what?" his confusion only deepening.

"I'm getting married! Can you believe it?" Buffy bounced on her toes, giddy with happiness.

"I don't think 'no' is a strong enough word. Buffy, earlier you were just telling me you weren't ready for a relationship, now you're engaged? What? Are you crazy?"

"Oh" her face fell, beginning to feel a little nervous. "Well, you see... it's just that... well..."

"So, it's just me then? I'm not good enough" he glared at her before looking down at the floor. He didn't know if he wanted to know the answer, but there was something he had to know. "What's his name?"

"Who?"

"The groom" he bit out.

"Spike" Just saying his name made her break into a huge grin.

"That's a name?"

"Don't be mad"

Riley ignored her plea and continued his questioning. "Who is this guy? Does he go here?" _If he does, I think I should meet him._

She couldn't help it, she burst out laughing. Managing to get her giggles under control, she choked back the rest and answered. "Oh, no. He's totally old"

"Old" he stated.

"Well, not as old as my last boyfriend" she said flippantly, shrugging her shoulders.

"You know what? Fine. I hope you're both very happy together" He spun on his heel and stalked away.

"You're ruining my happy day" Buffy said to herself, pouting slightly. _At least I've got Spike waiting for me_ she thought with a smile, instantly happy again. With a spring in her step, she entered the bridal shop.

* * *

Half an hour, one cake topper but no tagis root later, Buffy returned to Giles' apartment. At some point, Giles had gotten a damp cloth to place over his eyes, and Buffy had shrugged, guessing there was no more she could do to help. _Besides, there's still so much to do _she thought excitedly as she once again took up her position in Spike's lap.

She grabbed the decorative figurine she'd bought from a wedding shop she'd passed on the way to the magic shop and leant back against Spike's chest. He watched her, one eyebrow raised in amusement and a faint smile touching his lips, as Buffy walked the pair up his arm as she hummed.

"Duh dum, da-da... Duh dum, da-da... duh dum da-da dum da-da dum da-da"

_I honestly can't take much more of this._ "So the plan is to cure my total, incapacitating blindness... tomorrow, is it?" he asked, his tone belying his irritation.

"They were all out of tagis root at the magic shop. They'll have more tomorrow. I'm completely on top of it" Buffy assured her Watcher, her eyes never leaving the small figures she held in her hand. "Aren't they the perfect little us?" she asked, nudging Spike with her shoulder.

Spike scowled at the tiny male figurine. "I don't like him. He's insipid. Clearly human"

Buffy straightened as an idea hit her. "Oh! Red paint. We could smear a little on his mouth. The blood of the innocent" she said, grinning at her vampire.

_I love the way this girl thinks. No wonder I fell for her._ "Tha's m' girl" He pulled her to him for another heated kiss.

Giles clutched the cloth to his eyes and his head shot up to face somewhere to his left. "Stop that right now! I can hear the smacking"

Buffy pulled herself away with a sheepish grin, a light blush colouring her cheeks. Leaning forward, she put the figurines on the table and grabbed the discarded notebook. "Honey, we need to talk about the invitations. Now, do you wanna be William the Bloody, or just Spike? 'Cause, either way, it's gonna look majorly weird" _Or we could just have the Slayer of Slayers and the Slayer_ she thought with a grin.

Spike huffed. "Whereas the name Buffy gives it that touch of classic elegance"

"What's wrong with Buffy?" the blonde asked, giving him a look that told him he better answer correctly.

"Ah... such a good question" mumbled Giles.

"Well, it's a terrible name" Spike replied, ignoring Giles' interjection.

"My mother gave me that name"

"Your mother, yeah, she's a genius" Spike mocked her.

Buffy held up a finger, pointing it at his face warningly. "Don't you start in on my mother"

Luckily, the arguing pair were interrupted as Xander and Anya came hurtling through Giles' front door, slamming it behind them and locking it firmly.

"Board up the windows, and barricade the doors" Xander commanded frantically.

Giles lifted his head at the commotion, wishing, not for the first time in the past hour, that he wasn't blind. "What's going on?"

"Demons. They keep coming and coming" Anya stated.

"I think we lost them, but I couldn't see" Xander turned from where he'd been looking outside the window for more demons to see Spike stood next to Buffy, sans ropes. "Spike! He's all untied!" he exclaimed. At everyone's looks, he flushed in embarrassment. "Which you probably noticed"

" Xander, calm down, okay? If you lost them, that'll give us some time to figure this out" Buffy tilted her head back slightly to look at Spike. "Maybe the demons have something to do with Giles being blind"

"Giles is blind?" asked Anya.

Xander gradually approached Giles and waved his fingers in his face, much in the same way as Buffy had. "Please stop whatever you're doing. You smell like fruit roll-ups"

Spike glanced between the Slayer hanging on his arm, the ex-vengeance demon, the construction worker and the retired librarian. "This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed"

Buffy blushed slightly, but conceded his point. "Spike's right. We really should get organized" Spike was pleasantly surprised by her agreement. _Now there's somethin' you don' see every day_ he thought, chuckling under his breath.

"Why are you holding hands?" Anya inquired curiously. _I wonder if this has anything to do with Buffy being from the future. I mean, she must have known this was gonna happen, right?_

Buffy turned to Spike, a silent question in her eyes. Spike ducked his head shyly and shrugged. "They have to hear it sooner or later"

A big grin broke across Buffy's face as she spun in his arms to face her friends. "Spike and I are getting married!" Spike wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder, watching their reactions.

Xander was completely baffled. "How? What? How?" he asked eloquently.

"Three excellent questions" Giles added.

"What are you lookin' at?" Spike asked Buffy, the two of them lost in their own world once more.

"The man I love" she responded, lifting her head to receive his kiss.

Xander stared at them for a moment, disgust and horror raging inside of him. He thought he was going to be sick. "Can I be blind, too?" he asked desperately as Anya nodded at his side.

Suddenly, he remembered something, but something that Xander couldn't quite pinpoint. "Wait... married... I know something... what is it? Everything's so familiar... Work, brain, work!" Then it clicked. "Oh! Oh oh! Willow!"

Buffy heard her redheaded friend's name and tried to pull away from Spike for a moment. "Mm...what about Will... Mm, honey, get off"

"Not yet, maybe later" he whispered huskily in her ear, for her alone to hear, sending shivers of anticipation down her spine. Trying to ignore the fire that his touch was building, she focused on the conversation. _Don't think about your sexy fiend of a fiancé. Think about anything other than your sexy fiend of a fiancé._

"Something about Willow and her grief-y 'poor me' mood swings. So, so tired of it" Xander continued.

"You mean I don't have to be nice about her anymore?" Anya asked her boyfriend.

"Well, we're all tired of it, but what does that have to do with what's going on?" Buffy asked, intimately aware of the cool trails of scorching ice Spike's fingers were tracing up and down her arm.

"She told me I was a demon magnet, a-and you two should get married" explained the brunette, gesturing at the blond couple.

Giles realised that he knew the last piece of the puzzle, and suddenly everything made sense. "And... that I didn't see anything"

"She did a spell" Buffy said simply.

"Yes... to have her will done. Whatever she says is coming true" agreed her Watcher.

"And you both were affected" She turned to Spike, her arms tightened around him. "I probably only escaped because I'm the Slayer. Some kind of natural immunity"

"Yeah. Right. You're marrying Spike because you're so right for each other" Xander said, his tone dripping in sarcasm.

Buffy faced him, hurt shining in her eyes. "Xander"

Spike growled inaudible, the rumble actually helping comfort Buffy. _That git. No one hurts my girl._ "That's it. You're off the usher list" _Never liked 'im anyway._

_I was on the usher list?_ Xander thought, too stunned to reply. Giles saved him from having to come up with a response. "People, Willow is out there and she probably doesn't know what she's doing"

"We gotta find her" proposed Xander, rather obviously, though he was still a little shocked by the news that he was chosen as an usher for Buffy's wedding. Shaking his head, he regained his common sense. _It's not real, so there's not gonna be a wedding for you to be an usher at._

"Before somebody gets really hurt" Buffy said worriedly, glancing between the members of her small family. At that moment, Giles tried to move forward, but stumbled, and fell to the floor with a thud. _Way to go, Buffy. Jinx everyone while you're at it_ she thought to herself and she helped Giles stand up.

* * *

Buffy led the way down Stevenson Hall's corridors, towards the dorm she shared with Willow. Her left hand was entwined with Spike's right, their fingers linked and their palms pressed together. She loved that such a small gesture could fill her with affection, both from and for him.

"Why does he have to come?" Xander griped, pointing at Spike.

"Xander, Spike is going to be my husband. I want him included"

"I agree with Xander here. Seems like a lot of work for people who aren't us" Spike argued.

"Spike, these are my friends. Besides, it's kinda my job" _Playing referee is gonna get real boring, real fast._

Spike squeezed her hand gently before replying. "For now"

"What? You want me to stop working?" Buffy asked incredulously.

"Let's see. Do I want you to give up killing all my friends? Yeah, I've given it some thought" Spike bit back.

Buffy pushed open the door to her room, freezing when she saw it was empty and everything was the same. Except for the scorch mark in the carpet, that snapped her back into action. She crouched down beside it, touching the edges of the mark gently. _That's gonna be expensive to get out._ "This is burned"

Anya folded her arms in annoyance and offered an explanation. "D'Hoffryn. Bastard, he's opened a portal here"

"Who?" she paused. _I know that name..._ "Oh, you mean the big blue guy with a white beard. You're ex-boss" Anya nodded at her.

Spike had lost interest pretty much as soon as he stepped into the room. _Perfect time to get a peek at the Slayer's unmentionables_ he thought with a smirk as he made his way silently towards her closet to have a look. Pulling out an orange skirt, he held it up. "Oh, fluffy. Wear this to the rehearsal dinner and the whole thing's off"

Buffy rolled her eyes. "Shut up, honey" She turned back to Anya. "He's gonna offer to make her a demon, isn't he?"

Anya looked a little taken aback before remembering their conversation before and giving her a meaningful look and another nod.

* * *

"You have much anger and pain. Your magic is strong, but your pain. It's like a scream that pierces dimensional walls. We heard your call" D'Hoffryn addressed the scared witch in Arashmahaar, fully aware that she would not accept his offer. Unless he did something different this time.

"I-I'm sorry. I'll try for a quiet rage. Bye" Willow stuttered nervously, turning to leave.

"Our intention is not to quash your potential. Quite the contrary" the blue demon continued, his voice drawing her back towards him. "The pain and suffering you brought upon those you love is inspiring. You are ready to join us here in Arashmahaar"

"Pain? What pain?" she asked, clueless to the havoc and destruction her spell was creating.

D'Hoffryn placed his palms together, drawing them slowly apart to create a viewing portal between them. It showed a tomb, inside which Anya, Xander, Spike and Buffy could be seen trying to hold off a hoard of demons.

"Oh, God. But I didn't mean to!"

"But you did. This is the result of your power. You will make a fine vengeance demon" he said, allowing the portal to disappear.

"No, please! You have to help them!" Willow pleaded, feeling more helpless than she had in a long time.

"You are my interest in this matter. Are you not interested in being able to help others in the same position such as yourself?" Willow didn't answer, his words echoing in her mind. "Oz left you, he broke your heart. He made you fall in love then ripped you apart by cheating on you, then running away" He could sense the anger welling inside of her, he could almost smell the power. "I can help you to help those that have been wronged in the same way. You can really help them"

"_Help others... broke your heart... cheating... running... wronged...You can really help them" I could help them. I can make their pain go poof._ Willow debated his offer. _Would being a demon really be all that bad, especially if I'm helping people?_ The images of her friends in the tomb came flooding back to her. _Oh my God! What was I thinking? Of course I can't accept, it would be wrong. And I have to help my friends! "_Really... no offense intended... I mean, you've been super nice and everything, but... I don't want to be a demon. I just wanna go back and help my friends"

D'Hoffryn sighed. Obviously, she was just never meant to become a part of the vengeance fold. "That is your answer?"

"I-it is" Willow confirmed.

D'Hoffryn loomed over her. "I'm sorry to hear that" His voice then changed from menacing to conversational in the blink of an eye. "Oh well. Here is my talisman. You change your mind, give us a chant" D'Hoffryn handed her the small item and clapped his hands, and everything faded to black.

* * *

The two couples made their way through the cemetery, following Anya as she led them to a crypt where she knew she'd be able to summon her ex-boss and explained how she'd met him. "I'd been dumped, I was miserable, doing a few vengeance spells. Boils on the penis, nothing fancy"

"Please skip ahead" Xander insisted.

Anya rolled her eyes but did so. "D'Hoffryn got wind of me, he offered to elevate me, and he made me a demon"

Buffy glanced at her worriedly. "But, you can summon this guy from this crypt, right? You can make him stop and... Oh my God, stop! Wouldn't this be a perfect place for pictures?" she smiled brightly and pulled Spike along by his hand towards a crypt with ivy growing up the side.

Spike tried to pull back, following reluctantly when stopping meant releasing his beloved's hand. "I'm not posing for chuff all" he stated firmly. Buffy turned to him, a sad look in her eyes and mouth turned into a pout. He could feel himself crumbling already. _Keep it together, mate. Can't let 'er always get 'er way now, right? But it would make her happy..._

As Spike was about to give in, just to wipe that look of her face and make her smile again, a demon interrupted, wandering towards them. Xander's eyes widened and he backed up, pointing at it. "Hey... demon"

Buffy looked away from her fiancé to see the red demon approaching them. Walking towards it cautiously, she waited for its attack. Holding up her forefinger, she pointed it at the demon. "Okay, listen. Now... we're gonna do this without ruining the foliage" _I'll make him give in later. I bet he'll look so cute in a tux._

Buffy lashed out, kicking the demon three times in quick succession. The blow to its head made it stumble slightly, but not enough to lose its balance. It landed a strong blow to the side of Buffy head, knocking her over a headstone. She fell to the floor with a grunt of pain, waiting until the demon got close to her again before flipping up, catching its chin with the heels of her boots in a double kick.

It fell to a knee, and Buffy aimed another kick for its head. The demon was faster though, and ducked underneath. She recovered quickly, punching its head instead. It hit her in return and got up. Buffy was ready though, and grabbed its shoulders in a strong grip. She threw it to the side, where it lay still, momentarily stunned. The blonde looked up to see more demon emerging from the trees. She spun to face her friends.

"Let's go!" she commanded, running away from the demons and leading them to a nearby crypt.

The four of them ran inside, and Buffy and Spike grabbed what appeared to be the lid of a sarcophagus. They heaved it towards the doors, placing it in front of it and creating a makeshift barricade whilst Xander leant against the doors, using his weight to keep them closed as best as he could. Anya ran to the far side, and kneeled in the dirt. She drew a circle around herself in the dirt and closed her eyes as she began to chant.

"Blessed be, the name of D'Hoffryn. Let this space be now a gateway to the world of Arashmahaar, where demons are spawned"

A window smashed, breaking Anya's concentration, and a demon's arm reached in to grab the Slayer. The thick arm wrapped around her neck and pulled her back against the wall, holding her in place and choking her.

"Buffy!" yelled Spike, about to go to her, Xander's voice the only thing that stopped him.

"Not doin' well here" he said through gritted teeth, putting all his effort into keeping the door shut and the demons out.

Anya tuned out everything around her and continued. "We come in supplication. We bend as the reed in the flow of, uh... No, wait..." She frowned as she tried to remember the correct words. "We, we come in the flow of, uh... Ugh!" she yelled out in frustration. She took a deep calming breath and started again. "Blessed be, the name of D'Hoffryn"

Buffy struggled against the arm that held her, pulling at it and trying to wiggle free of its grasp. She wrapped a hand around its bicep and squeezed with all her strength. She felt its grip loosen a little, and it was enough for her to get leverage to free herself. She ran straight to Spike's side, gripping the bottom of the stone lid and helping him hold it against the door.

Spike glanced at the door then back to Buffy. _They're gonna get in_ he thought, resigned and panicked about the realisation. "They're strong, and I can't fight. If they get in, I don't know if I can protect you"

Buffy glared at him. "You think you have to protect me?"

Spike sighed. "Oh, not with the Girl-Power bit!" he exclaimed in exasperation. _Can' she see I jus' don' wan' anythin' to happen to 'er? I love her._

Suddenly, the demons rammed against the door, sending all three of them backwards with the force. Buffy retreated to one side as Spike retreated to the other. The first demon to enter took Xander by surprise and knocked him back with a hard push. The demon behind him punched Spike, the blow landing harshly on his face. Buffy ran towards him to help, but was stopped by the demon that had attacked Xander. It grasped her shoulder tightly and threw her to the side.

The other demon dismissed Spike when it realised he wasn't going to fight back. Instead, it advanced on Buffy, who lay prone in the dust. The blonde was prepared, resting her weight on her right hand as she landed two solid kicks to its abdomen and flipped to her feet.

The red demon had left Buffy to the other and once again went for Xander. The brunette grabbed an axe and used it to block its attack, but the demon anticipated it and grabbed hold of the handle. It pushed him towards the wall of the crypt until his back hit it. Anya had seen the demon though, and ran up behind it, trying to throw him off. Undeterred, the demon punched her, sending her into a stone pillar where she collapsed to the floor.

Buffy ducked the horned demons arm as he swung at her again. She landed two more punches to its head and a knee to its stomach, doubling it over in pain. She grabbed it and threw it into the same pillar, but it was unfazed as it stood and ran towards her again.

Anya recovered quickly from her fall and ran back towards the demon where it had Xander pinned against the sarcophagus they had taken the lid from. Jumping up, she landed on its back and wrapped her arms and legs around it tightly. The demon was distracted by her and spun around, trying to dislodge her and forgetting about Xander. He watched as it whirled again and again to no avail, and waited for his opening. He punched the demon in the head and the stomach, but was once again thrown back as it landed its own to his head.

The horned demon pushed Buffy backwards, almost knocking her down. It grabbed her around the throat and started to choke her. Adrenaline surged through her veins and she kicked at it, desperately trying to escape its grip. She glanced over to see Xander holding onto one of the red demons arms and punching it as Anya hit it repeatedly on the head from her perch on its back. Just as she thought it couldn't get worse, another demon burst through the doors, knocking Spike to the floor.

Buffy saw as he landed hard on his back and felt anger boil her blood. _Oh, they're gonna pay._ With a strength she wasn't even certain she had before, she kicked the demon that held her, breaking free and causing it to fly backwards. She ran up to the demon that had arrived, kicking it in the chest and sending it straight back out the door. She closed them quickly and rushed to Spike's side.

"Honey!" she exclaimed, kneeling beside him and placing her hands on his chest, running her eyes over him to check for injuries. "Oh, Spike... are you okay?"

Spike lifted his head to see her looking down at him with concern in her green gaze.

"Slayer" he murmured. Buffy leant down to kiss him, reaffirming that he was okay. He was alive. He was real. Spike eagerly returned it, his hands going to her waist as she straddled him to keep her in place. The couple lost themselves in each other, unaware of the others still fighting the red demon.

Xander wrapped his hands around the demon's neck as it did the same to him, trying to hold it back and discourage its grip. Anya also tried to deter it, tightening her grip as she held onto its back. "Help here!" Xander choked out, but the entwined blondes were oblivious.

A flash of blue lightening lit the crypt in an eerie light, signalling Willow's arrival as she appeared at the side of the tomb. She gasped at the sight that met her eyes. She had seen it before, but it couldn't have prepared her for seeing it with her own eyes. Quickly, she began to chant the reversal spell. "Let the healing power begin. Let my will be safe again. As these words of peace are spoken, let this harmful spell be broken"

As she intoned the last word, there was another flash, and both the demons in the crypt vanished, leaving Xander and Anya to stare at each other in confusion.

Buffy and Spike froze, their lips still touching softly. _What do I do?_ Buffy thought anxiously. It repeated rapidly in her head as she wondered what she should do. _This is the moment of truth, the one Kimardi told me about. This moment can change everything. So... what should I do?_

A/N: I know, a cliffie! I'm sorry, please don't hate me too much! lol

This chapter, though I kept it as close to the episode as possible, got very long. In fact, I think it's the longest so far, so I decided to split it up again. But the next chapter will be Buffy's reaction to the spell being lifted. So... will she keep event the same, or change them? And will they be for better or worse? Read the next update to find out ;)

Thanks for reading and please review!

Jay

* * *


	9. Spell Casting Aftermath

A/N: Thank you to Doni, mat528, missgwen33, Naeara and Carol for your reviews on the last chapter!

Okay, so I know the last chapter was very into the episode "Something Blue", but it kinda had to be for the rest of my story to work. This chapter though will be completely off canon, and I hope you enjoy it =)

* * *

Chapter 9 : Spell Casting Aftermath

Buffy held her breath as she pulled back slightly from the vampire under her. She slowly opened her eyes and watched for his reaction. He seemed as stunned as she was. _Okay, Buffy, all or nothing. I just hope he doesn't reject me._ Her heart was still fragile after the events of Sunnydale, and though just seeing Spike again was like a balm to her emotional wounds, she wasn't invulnerable, and her heart could still break.

She gave him a timid smile, not moving for her position over him. He didn't react, still staring at her. Taking a deep breath she gathered her nerve and leant down again, touching her lips to his. That snapped him out of it.

_Oh, God, I was in love with the Slayer. I was gonna marry her. And she's straddling me. She's so soft, so warm. She's gorgeous. No! She's isn't! Well, yeah okay, she is. But she's my mortal enemy, I wanna bite her, drain her dry._ He tried to convince himself, and as he repeated it over and over in his shocked mind, he noticed he hadn't moved yet. Suddenly, she was leaning down again, kissing him gently. He pulled back immediately, staring at her with wide disbelieving eyes. The hint of horror in them hurt her like a physical blow.

"What the bloody hell are you doing?" He pushed her off him, stopping when he got a warning shock from the chip. He struggled to his feet and left the hurting blonde on the dusty crypt floor. He wiped a hand across his mouth, a childish gesture to rid his lips of her kisses.

Agony pierced her heart at his rejection, but she steeled herself against it. She had put her feelings on the line, but had been prepared for the possibility that he wouldn't return her affections. It didn't stop the pain that lanced through her though. She shot to her feet and glared at him, her defensive walls rising in an attempt to protect herself.

"What am I doing? What about you?" she shouted.

He stared at her incredulously. "What are you on about, you daft bint?"

"You! With, with your one outfit, and, and girly nail polish and, and stupid hair" _Oh, nice one_ she thought sarcastically. _Really insulting._

He frowned in confusion, bewilderment replacing the horror from before. "What?"

Buffy folded her arms across her chest and pointedly ignored him, turning to the redhead in the corner. Xander and Anya had watched the exchange and were as perplexed as Spike, but looked to Willow as well. Shaking his head, Spike did the same.

"Hi, guys" said Willow quietly, giving them a small wave.

Buffy gave her a small smile and Xander nodded to her. "We should get going" Buffy said quietly, turning and exiting the crypt. The others glanced at each other before following behind the blonde.

* * *

The walk back to the dorms was as awkward as that to Giles'. Xander and Anya had headed straight back to his parents' basement, whereas the remaining three had gone back to the Watcher's. No one had spoken since leaving the crypt, and the atmosphere had remained strained for the entire journey.

Once they had reached Giles', Buffy had informed him that the spell had been lifted and tied Spike to the chair as he had told her to. She used the opportunity to bask in his closeness, though she avoided eye contact with him. She had wound the rope tightly around him, but not as much as she probably should have, and she let her touch linger a little longer than strictly necessary. If Spike noticed at all, he didn't comment. Instead he chose to remain unusually silent, and for once, she had no idea what he was thinking. _I can usually read him so well, but he's shutting me out._ The thought hurt Buffy even more than her broken heart already did.

Willow had apologised repeatedly before they had bid Giles goodbye. As she passed Spike, Buffy whispered "Goodnight", knowing that he'd hear and meaning it for his ears only. If he reacted, she didn't see as she then left with the redhead without looking back.

Now they entered their dorm, the tension thrumming between them so strongly it was almost visible. Buffy let Willow through the door first, following after her and shutting it quietly. She kept facing the door, counting the seconds until she knew Willow would apologise again. _3...2...1..._

Willow spun round to face her friend. "I'm so, so sorry, Buffy. I never meant to – "

"Look, Willow, I'm really tired. Can we just... not do this now?" she said tiredly. Turning, she changed into her yummy sushi pyjamas and slipped under the covers.

Willow stood there for a moment, wringing her hands nervously and shifting her weight on the spot as she watched Buffy move around the room and climb into bed. "O-okay, we'll talk in the morning" she said quietly, changing and getting into bed too.

Buffy clicked off the light and turned onto her side, facing her closet and away from the other girl. She didn't say goodnight, but just closed her eyes and hoped for sleep to come. Tomorrow, she'd have to talk to Giles and Willow. This couldn't go on.

* * *

The tension had remained when between the two friends as they returned to Giles' apartment. As soon as they entered, Willow went to the kitchen and started pulling out ingredients, calling out to Giles as she did so.

"Hey, Giles. Listen, I'm really sorry about yesterday. Let me make it up to you. I'll make some cookies" she said brightly.

Buffy walked through the door more sedately, smiling at Giles. "Hi, Giles. Spike" She smiled at him when he looked at her in surprise. She pulled herself up onto the stool opposite the other blond, keeping her eyes down but glancing up at him frequently.

Spike knew that Buffy thought she was being discrete, but he had seen her giving him fleeting looks. _What is she lookin' at?_

An unwanted memory from the previous day surfaced. _"The man I love" she answered softly, staring up at him with large green eyes full of trust and love. It had felt so good to be that needed, that wanted, that... loved. _Spike sighed. It wasn't right that the little witch could give him everything he'd yearned for his whole life and to then snatch it away again. Even if it had been in his enemy.

_Is she really my enemy anymore though? She's helped me, fed me... she's seemed different ever since that attack._ He raised his eyes just as she tried to sneak another peek at him. When she saw she'd been spotted, she blushed and looked down before exaggeratingly turning to Giles.

"Are Xander and Anya coming?" she asked.

"As far as I know, they are. Xander called me earlier to say they'd be here" he answered, just as the door opened again and the couple in question walked in.

"Hey, guys. What's up?" the brunette boy asked as he dropped onto the sofa. He looked around the room, his eyes landing on Giles. "G-Man! Are you all Seeing Man yet?"

"Yes, thank you, Xander. And how frequently must I implore you not to use that awful moniker?"

"Just until you ask it in English, man"

Both Giles and Spike sighed at his comment, glancing askance at each other and sharing a brief look of rare solidarity. Xander missed the look that passed between them and stood, grabbing a small clock from a bookshelf.

"Take a seat, Giles. Let's test out that new sight of yours"

Giles sighed again, but took a seat as told. Xander moved the hands around and turned it around. "Time?"

"Ah, five past two. Clear as day" he said and Xander grinned, nodding and taking a seat in the armchair.

Willow came through from the kitchen with Anya, a plate of cookies in her hands. "Look, cookies! A very non-evil thing I did. Oatmeal?"

Giles scowled, removing his glasses and cleaning them on the bottom of his shirt. "Yes, very funny. They're chocolate chip, I can see them. I still need my glasses though. You could have been more specific and given me twenty- twenty" He squinted at his glasses before replacing them and taking a cookie from the plate.

Willow went to Buffy and held the plate out. "Eat a cookie, ease my pain"

Buffy took a cookie and bit into it. "Mm, better?"

"Well, baking lifts about 30% of my guilt, but only 7% of my inner turmoil. Guess that'll just take awhile" Willow said, dropping her gaze.

_This is it. I have to talk to her. _"You know, Wills, you can't keep doing that"

"Doing what? I'm not doing anything" she said, her eyes wide and innocent.

"I meant that you can't keep casting spells to change something you don't like"

Willow frowned. "What? I was just trying to make the pain go away. I didn't mean to – "

"That's just it, Will" Buffy said, keeping her tone soft and gentle. "You didn't mean to, but you did. What happens if the next time you cast a spell someone really does get hurt?"

"But... I just want to help"

"Maybe, that's how it started. But you starting to cast them to help yourself, for your own personal gain"

"Why are you saying this?" she said, fighting back the tears that had sprung to her eyes.

"Because I care about you. I don't want to lose you to the magic..."

"You won't" Willow contradicted.

Buffy continued as if she had not been interrupted. "... which will happen if you keep on this path"

Giles and Spike, who had both been watching them with barely veiled interest and curiosity respectively, looked to her at her voice. It held the weight of knowledge, the same swirling in her eyes and making her look older in that moment than her years. She acknowledged their looks with an almost imperceptible nod.

"Buffy, what aren't you telling us?" Giles asked, watching her closely for a reaction.

She observed the people around her, then locked eyes with Anya. The other girl shrugged slightly, showing that she was unsure of what Buffy should do. "I need to speak to Anya first" Without waiting for a response, the two girls turned and walked out the door.

Everyone stared at the door, a range of emotions crossing their faces. Eventually the silence was broken. "Don't I get a cookie?" asked Spike nonchalantly from his chair and successfully lightening the mood a little.

Willow held the plate out absently, her mind still on Buffy's words and wondering what on Earth the Slayer could be saying to Anya that she felt she couldn't share with her best friend.

* * *

"And people say I'm blunt and unsubtle" Anya said as the door shut behind them.

Buffy smiled little as she turned to face the brunette. "Yeah, well I haven't had a chance to talk to you since I did the ritual"

"But it worked? You talked to her?"

"Yeah, and you were right. It was Kimardi"

"I thought so" She saw the blonde's look and grinned. "She wasn't quite what you expected, was she?"

"No, definitely not. She looked... normal. She was nice too"

"Yeah, she's a great beautician too" Buffy looked at her strangely before grinning. "So, what did she have to say?" Anya prompted.

"She basically told me you were right, and the reason that I was sent back to now"

After a moment and it was clear she wasn't going to speak again, so Anya did. "Why were you?"

"I'd... rather not say. Not now, anyway" Anya nodded. "So, do you think I should tell them I'm from the future, or what?"

Anya frowned in thought. "Well, I'd suggest you tell Giles. He's good with the books, and he clearly already knows something's up"

Buffy nodded, seeing the logic in what Anya was saying. She opened the door again and called for Giles to join them outside. Giles gave her a perplexed look but did as she asked.

"Am I right to assume that this is something to do with your strange behaviour?" he asked with mild amusement.

"Yeah, actually, it is. Look, I'm not sure how to say this, so I'm just gonna say it. I'm not the Buffy you think I am. I'm from four years in the future. Something terrible happened and I... kinda made a wish. A vengeance demon called Kimardi granted it and..." she held her arms out to the side. "... here I am"

Giles stood there, staring at her for a second. Then he started laughing. He held an arm around his middle, his sides aching with the chuckles that burst from his chest. Upon seeing her look, he tried to compose himself. "I'm sorry, Buffy, but it's ludicrous. I mean, time travel? It's, it's... it's simly not possible"

"In a few weeks, Ethan Rayne's going to come to town. He's going to turn you into a, a... Fee... something demon" When Giles' look didn't change, she tried again. "The thing that stops Spike from hurting people? It's a government chip designed by a group called the Initiative. Their commando lab is beneath the college campus and is run by my psychology professor, Maggie Walsh. They're designing... the ultimate warrior or something. His name is Adam, and he's made up of human, demon and machine parts, run by a uranium core at the base of his spine" she informed him flatly, the serious look in her eyes sobering him.

"Good Lord, you're telling the truth" Buffy nodded and he blanched. He removed his glasses, cleaning them again as he absorbed what she was saying.

"The reason I've decided to tell you now is that in three years time, Willow gets addicted to magic. Eventually she tried using it to end the world. She came the closest anyone ever has to actually doing it" _Except maybe Glory. But does that count? I mean, it would be Hell on Earth, but the world wouldn't technically end..._ she shook herself out of her thoughts and turned back to Giles.

"Willow has to get training, now, before it happens again. I just... don't know how to tell her. I wasn't sure if I wanted anyone to know, because you'll all start asking questions about your future and there are some things that..." she sighed and looked away before locking eyes with him again, the heavy emotions and knowledge filling her own. "Some things you're better off not knowing"

Giles nodded, and in that moment, he'd never been more proud of the Slayer that he'd been assigned to. He touched her upper arm lightly, conveying everything with his eyes. "We'll tell them you had a vision or something. A, a Slayer dream, perhaps"

Buffy's eyes lit up. "Yeah, that could work" She flung her arms around her mentor. "Thanks, Giles. I knew I could count on you" Giles tentatively returned her embrace until they heard a cough from behind them.

"This is very touching, but we should go back inside" Anya said, walking around them and opening the door. Smiling at her antics, the other two followed, ready to face the onslaught of questions from the group.

* * *

Buffy thought that it would be best if she spoke first, hopefully averting all the questions her friends had. "Okay, here's the deal. I had a Slayer dream the other night, and I have a feeling it was showing me a glimpse of the future. Giles agrees"

"Well, why did you need Anya, then?" Willow asked with a frown.

"Because it concerned her as well" Giles answered, willing Buffy to accept his explanation.

Buffy saw his slight nod out of the corner of her eye. "In my dream, I saw Anya in a shop and it was completely ruined. She said 'This is the end', then suddenly I was on a hill, watching you, Wills. There was a big temple kinda thing sticking out of Kingman's Bluff and you were channelling your magic into it" Willow looked at her uncomprehendingly. "It was a Satanic temple, and you were using it to destroy the world"

Willow gasped, the unshed tears that had built up spilling over her cheeks. "But I would never do that"

Buffy's eyes filled with sadness as she gazed at the redhead. "Yes, you would. Not now, but in time" she said with certainty. She took a deep breath, ignoring the pain of that year. "That's why you have to get help now. It's not a punishment, trust me. That was the other part of my dream. Anya was there again and said something like 'The answer lies in England'. I spoke to Giles, and he knows a coven in Devon where you can go to learn how to hone your magic and build your power" Buffy was impressed with herself. If she didn't know any better, she'd say she was telling the truth. She walked towards Willow and went to embrace her, feeling the hurt when she flinched away. Willow stared at her in betrayal before fleeing the apartment.

Buffy rubbed her forehead, holding back her own tears. Giles put his arm around her, his presence comforting her. "It'll be all right, Buffy. You did the right thing"

"I know. That's what makes this harder" Giles was puzzled, and it showed in his expression. "If she doesn't go, we either have to force her, or... or we have to bind her powers" _But what about the spell with the scythe? I need Wills for that. But then... is that worth risking the fate of the planet?__ What if Willow manages to do it this time?_

"Is that really necessary?" asked Xander, his voice barely hiding his anger. He couldn't believe what he'd just seen. Buffy had just turned on her best friend.

Buffy pulled away from Giles and faced him. "Xander, you know how my dreams are. They always come true"

"Oh, yeah? When did you last have a Slayer dream?" he asked, crossing his arms.

_When was my last dream? _"The Master" she replied, shuddering slightly. The name alone still sent a shiver of fear through her. "I dreamt he killed me"

"But you came back. Who's to say Willow's gonna go all evil? And if she does, she could come back, just like you"

"You don't know that. Trust me, Xand, she has to go"

"I can't believe you. You just abandoning your best friend. She needs your help and you just ship her off to another country with a bunch of strangers?" He shook his head and glared at her.

"Xander, that's quite enough" Giles said, supporting his charge.

"I don't have to listen to this. C'mon, Ahn" He walked passed them towards the door, stopping when he realised she wasn't following. "Ahn?"

Anya looked to Buffy, a silent message passing between the two. When the brunette realised she wasn't needed, she gave the other girl a small smile before grasping Xander's hand and letting him lead her out. Buffy didn't watch as they left, slamming the door behind them.

* * *

Three minutes passed before a British accent asked something unexpected. "So, Slayer's from the future?" Spike asked curiously, looking over her from head to toe and raising an eyebrow.

Buffy gaped at him. "No" she scoffed. She saw he was unconvinced and gave up. "Fine, yes, I am"

Spike broke out into a grin. "Great! So, when do I get this chip out?"

_Couldn't hurt to tell the truth, right? Just... not the whole truth._ "In about three years" she answered and he groaned.

"Three years?" he whined. "You mean I gotta live with this soddin' chunk o' metal in m' cranium for three bloody years?"

"Yep" she said, popping the 'p' and he groaned again. "I have some good news for you though"

The blond waited silently, until he saw she was waiting too. Grumbling under his breath about stubborn bints, he asked her "What's the good news then, luv?"

"You can fight demons" she said, smiling at the happiness that made his face light up. "That chip of yours only works on humans, so you can still get your rocks off by beating up on the demon community"

Spike shrugged. "Better than nothin', I guess" His head suddenly swung round to face her. "Did you know Red was gonna cast that spell?" he asked, his blue gaze seeming to pierce her soul.

"No, I didn't" she bluffed.

He watched her intently for a second. "You're lying" he stated simply. "So, what I'm wondering is... why would you let her cast a spell that you knew would make us wanna get married?"

Giles glanced at Buffy, also curious to hear her answer. _I can't tell him. Not yet. He won't believe me and he'll completely freak_ she thought, sighing inaudibly. "I had to. The effects of the spell may affect the events of the future. Things that I feel should stay the same... 'cos in the end, if they affect others, I didn't think it was my place to change it. And if it affected me... then I didn't want to"

Spike stared at her for almost a full minute before nodding, accepting her cryptic explanation. He could tell she wasn't telling him something, but from the look in her eyes he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

"Okay, well now you know, I guess there's no reason for me to be secretive about the next thing I need to talk to Giles about. Can you just... can you not tell Xander and Willow? I mean, I'll tell them if I have to, but right now, I think it'll do more harm than good. So could you keep it secret, please?" she pleaded with Spike. It took him off guard and he found himself nodding before he'd even fully considered what he could get for his silence. But when she smiled, he felt a warmth in his chest that he hadn't felt in a long time. Deciding not to dwell on the feeling and ignoring it, he turned to the topic at hand.

"So, wha' is it that's got your knickers in a twist, pet?"

"In about... a week... two maybe, the Gentlemen are gonna be in town. They're fairytale creatures that steal the voices from everyone in a town then collect seven hearts. I-I don't know what for, but they're seriously creepy, with these big grins and weird sidekicks" She started pacing and gesturing wildly as the two men watched her in partial fascination and amusement.

"I remember they're holed up in the clock tower, and that's where I found out Riley's a commando and only the scream of a girl can kill them" she babbled rapidly as Giles tried to keep up.

"The Gentlemen..." he finally said, frowning a little. "I've never heard of them. Spike?"

"Dunno"

"Well, are you certain?"

"No"

Giles sighed and looked to the ceiling for a second. "Buffy, are you quite sure?"

She made a noise in frustration that sounded suspiciously like a growl, taking her Watcher by surprise as she turned to him. Taking a breath, she opened her mouth and she began to sing the strange and haunting tune that had invaded her dreams on several nights since the attack. "Can't even shout, can't even cry, the Gentlemen are coming by. Peering in windows, knocking on doors, they need to take seven and they might take yours"

Giles was frozen for a second before grabbing his notebook and hastily scribbling down the verse she had recited. "Dear Lord, this is quite incredible"

"Huh, I thought it was ludicrous" she said lightly, smirking at him in a gesture reminiscent of the vampire tied up behind her.

"Is there anything else of import that you think we should be aware of?" Giles asked as he finished writing the last line.

She shook her head slowly as she wracked her memories. "I don't think so... Riley found out I was the Slayer, but he'll find that out eventually anyway. They've been wandering the cemeteries so it's only a matter of time before one of them recognises me from college" She had started pacing again, her brow furrowed in thought. "Which reminds me: we should come up with a plan to take down the Initiative, preferably before Adam escapes, 'cos in my time he killed a little boy as well as others before I got to him. Not to mention that it took some pretty heavy spell power to help take him down"

"But the Gentlemen?" Giles attempted to pull her back to the matter at hand.

Buffy blinked a few times and smiled faintly. "Uh, no... I think that's it"

Giles nodded and scribbled a few more notes on the bottom of the page underneath the song. He re-read everything he'd put so far and smiled at Buffy. "Well, I'll see if I can find anything else on the matter"

"Thanks, Giles" she said softly, smiling at her Watcher. Giles nodded again and picked up one of the books he'd been reading.

After a few seconds of silence, Spike spoke up again. "I'm hungry" he stated loudly.

With a sigh, Buffy straightened from where she'd leant back against the sofa again, making her way to the kitchen to heat up another mug of blood for the vampire that unknowingly held her heart.

* * *

A/N: I guess not a lot really happened here, but I kinda needed to set up the people who are gonna know about Buffy being from the future, as well as have her starting to prevent the bad things. Her interference though will start to impact the events of the near future very soon =D

Naeara: Also, I didn't think I'd had future Buffy tell Spike about his chip, at least not in so many words, so I've put in that little scene where he finds out. Plus, it means now he could, possibly maybe, help out with the Gentlemen ;)

So thanks for reading, and please review to let me know your thoughts!


	10. Not How She Remembers

A/N: Sorry for the delay! I finished this chapter on Tuesday, and meant to finish the final touches and post it yesterday, but I got a migraine and just thinking about looking at a computer screen made my head hurt. Luckily, I'm better now, so here's the next update =)

Thanks to missgwen33, mat528, Sailor Sayuri, Naeara, Carol, Doni, MedusaMyLove and PhinalePhantom for their great reviews! I think that the last chapter got the most reviews I've ever had for one update, so the Snoopy Dance was a given necessity lol =D

Also, I realised when I quickly read through my last chapter that the Slayer dream she would have had before her 'dream' would have been the ones about Dru, Angel, and the french monkey stealing the hippos pants ( unless she had one in season 3 that I can't remember about... ) so I apologise for the slip, but hopefully it works as I think the Master dream better fits Xander's argument anyway :D

Anyway, if you haven't already skipped the A/N to read the chapter, then here it is :)

* * *

Chapter 10 : Not How She Remembers

Willow stormed into her dorm, the fire of fury smouldering in her chest. _Who does she think she is? I mean, just 'cos she's the Slayer she thinks she can tell me what to do? I'd never destroy the world! I just... I just wanna help._ The budding witch felt her anger dissipate, leaving the hurt friend that just wanted support from the people she loved. _She doesn't know what it's like, being useless. To have this power? I could really make a difference. I just need a little help in getting there._

She glanced around her room as she set her bag down and saw the note she'd written about the Wicca meeting she'd seen a notice for. _I'll show her. I'll prove I can be a good witch._ Grabbing the note, she picked her bag back up and left the dorm, her resolve face firmly in place.

* * *

Buffy entered the dorm cautiously, preparing to face an angry and upset redhead, but was both relieved and disappointed when she was met with just an empty room. Sighing, she closed the door with a soft click and threw herself on to the bed. _I knew it would be hard, but... God, I've never felt so lost. Am I doing the right thing? I must be, right? And will all this be worth it if it means my friends hate me for it?_

As the questions and doubts continued to swirl in her mind, her eyes began to feel heavy, and she gave in to the comforting pull of slumber.

_

* * *

_

Buffy tried to stifle the yawn that overtook her but failed miserably. Blinking hard, she refocused on what her professor was saying.

"_Talking. Communication. One might say that communication is talking. But what we must remember is that talking is just one form of communication, not communication singularly. There are, in fact, many different ways we can convey our meaning to another person. A demonstration. Buffy Summers" The blonde's head shot up at her name, her eyes widening as she prayed that she hadn't been asked a question. "Come down to the front please"_

_Buffy took a moment to react, wondering if Professor Walsh was serious and standing nervously when it seemed she was. She slowly made her way to the front and stood beside the older woman, waiting for further instructions and uncertain as to why she was there._

"_A typical college girl, one assumes" Walsh turned to Buffy and spoke quietly to her. "Lie down on my desk"_

"_What?" Buffy asked, her voice wavering slightly._

_Her professor smiled reassuringly at her. "Go on, you're perfectly safe"_

_Her eyes flickered to the rest of the class, scanning the people watching her expectantly. Wary of the vulnerable position she was putting herself in, she lifted herself onto the desk and rested back on her elbows. She heard a noise behind her, and her head turned towards the door of the classroom. She thought she should have been surprised the new arrival was there, but somehow it felt right._

"_Hostile Seventeen, if you could oblige" Walsh directed her request to the vampire who had entered._

_Spike nodded and walked towards her. "Be a good boy, Spike" Walsh said, watching as he approached her student._

_He stood next to the desk, wrapping an arm around Buffy's waist and leaning his upper body towards hers. Green eyes locked with blue and they smiled softly at each other. His arm felt comfortable against her, making her feel safe. She cast the class and her teacher a quick glance before looking back to Spike. Amusement flickered in his gaze, but the affection there showed her he found her uneasiness endearing rather than funny._

_She shifted her weight on her elbows. "This feels very strange"_

"_Good strange, I hope" he replied, his voice quiet, though no less self assured. Buffy smiled at him, his face nearing hers so slowly it was almost imperceptible. "If I kiss you, the Earth will move"_

_Her smile widened to a grin. "Ego much?"_

_His eyes dropped to her lips, his own curving into a grin and a low chuckle rumbled from his chest. Without another word, he closed the gap between them. The kiss was gentle, tender, as each merely tasted the other's lips. Her own parted on a sigh, allowing his tongue entrance to her warm mouth. As they leisurely explored each other, they didn't notice the floor begin to shake._

_Everyone had vanished from the room, leaving just the couple on the desk, both completely oblivious to their surroundings. The walls vibrated with the force of the earthquake, books tumbled from shelves and lights fell from the ceiling to smash against students' desks._

_The two blondes finally parted, their faces just a whisper away from each other as they both panted for breath. "See, luv?" Spike asked, grinning again._

_Buffy turned her head minutely to look at the destruction around the room. "Fortune favours the brave" She looked back at him and smiled. "Guess you weren't lying"_

_His grin faded and his eyes became solemn as his gaze focused on hers again. "I lie"_

_She opened her mouth to reply when she heard a faint singing, her head whipping in the direction of the sound. "Do you hear that?" she asked Spike, only to turn and find he had vanished as suddenly as the others._

_Frowning, she sat up and slid off the desk. She opened the door to the classroom and the singing increased in volume, so she made her way out into the corridor. Peering around a corner, she saw a young girl with long blonde hair at the end of one of the halls. She was wearing a simple floral print dress, and held a small ornate wooden box._

"_Can't even shout, can't even cry. The Gentlemen are coming by. Peering in windows, knocking on doors. They need to take seven and they might take yours. Can't call to Mom, can't say a word. You're gonna die screaming but you won't be heard" The girl sang, her gaze staring straight forward at something behind Buffy._

_She felt a cold but familiar hand clamp on her shoulder, causing her to tense momentarily until she recognised who it was. "Spike" she sighed in relief. She spun to face him, but in Spike's place was a horrifying face. She gasped in fright, and before she had time to do no more than register its maniacal grin and dark suit, the darkness enveloped her._

* * *

Buffy woke with a gasp, choking back the scream that built in her throat and shooting up into a sitting position. Gulping down breaths, she clutched a hand to her chest and willed her erratic heartbeat to slow down. _Just a dream, it was just a dream._

She took a few more deep breaths before looking around at her surroundings. She was in her dorm where she had fallen asleep, but it was dark outside and Willow lay in the bed opposite her, sleeping deeply. Her friend's presence surprised her, as she thought that Willow would have wanted to avoid her as much as possible until they cooled down after their argument.

_Maybe she's not as mad as she seemed_ Buffy thought optimistically. It was then that the details of her dream came back to her. _That was so not what I dreamed last time. It was a long time ago, but it's not every night I have a dream like that. I'll have to talk to Giles. If my dreams are changing, I wonder what else that could mean..._

Realising there was nothing she could do that night, she rubbed her eyes tiredly. She stood with a yawn and changed into her pyjamas before slipping silently under the covers. Closing her eyes, Buffy sought sleep for a second time, hoping that her dreams would be more pleasant than the images of the monsters she had fought before and would now have to fight again.

* * *

Willow returned to her dorm just as the sun was setting. She had gone for coffee after her Wicca meeting in hopes of it cheering her up. At the seminar, she had been disappointed to find that none of the girls in the group were aspiring witches she'd hoped would be a part of it. They had in fact believed that spells were fiction. _They're just a bunch of wanna-blessed-be's _she thought, disgruntled that they hadn't been what she'd expected.

One girl had caught her attention though. Vibrations had thrummed through skin at the nearness of the other girl, the potential of great power in her aura calling the redhead to her. There was just something about her that pulled Willow in, drew her to her, making her want to get to know her better. _Tara, wasn't it? I think that's what that other girl called her. Well, maybe we can be friends_ she thought happily as she opened the door to her dorm.

Her mood darkened as she thought about what had transpired between herself and her roommate earlier that day. _If she's there, I'll just leave. Or maybe I won't, I live here too after all._ Schooling her features, she pushed the door open and walked into the room. She saw Buffy lying on her bed, fast asleep on the covers and still fully clothed. Seeing Buffy like this made her soften slightly. _We've been best friends for almost four whole years now. We shouldn't let something like this get between us. But... if she really was my friend, wouldn't she wanna help me, rather than tell me I should leave?_ Sighing and rubbing her temple, Willow dropped her bag and walked to her closet. As quietly as possible, she changed and got into her own bed.

_Maybe I should just sleep on this. Everything always looks better in the morning, right?_ She sighed and closed her eyes, her last sight being her blonde friend that had never done anything to hurt her and done everything in her power to save her friends.

* * *

Buffy's night had been restless after the dream in which the Gentlemen had had a starring role and she had anxiously awaited the sunrise. Despite her lack of sleep, she had showered and dressed as quickly as she could, started her paper and tried to talk to Willow.

_Willow woke slowly, stretching out her muscles and smiling when she felt the warmth of the sun on her face. She threw the covers back and stood, freezing when she saw Buffy was already awake._

"_Hi" Buffy said quietly, meeting Willow's wary gaze with her own soft one._

"_Hi" Willow replied stiffly._

"_Look, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry I was so hard on you yesterday. I should have had... I don't know, more tact I guess" she said with a nervous smile. "It's just, what with the spell and the dream, I was freaked" Willow looked down, shuffling her weight in the uncomfortable silence that followed. Buffy tried again. "It's just... that the spell you cast could have caused some real damage. What if you'd gotten mad and said something like 'Well why don't you just drop dead'?"_

_The witch's head snapped up and tears filled her eyes, though they still held a hint of defiance. It would have been so easy to accidently cause mayhem. She could have even had a death on her hands. Buffy had a sinking feeling in her stomach when Willow didn't relax at all. Instead she straightened her back as she stuck to her resolve. "You said yourself, I'm a good witch. But one spell goes wonky and you wanna send me off somewhere" she said angrily._

_Buffy wondered how much she could tell her about what her future held, and decided that a little information couldn't hurt. She smiled again, hoping she could get through to her emotional friend. "It's not that I wanna send you away. It's just that I know you wanna float something bigger than a pencil, that you wanna go further in the Wicca department. This coven can help you, guide you, and you'll be so powerful, Will"_

_Willow raised her eyes from where she'd dropped them to them floor once again, the anger fading from her voice and body. "Really? I could really help?" she asked uncertainly._

_Buffy's smile widened when she realised she was reaching her. "Yeah" she said gently. "You don't have to go now, and it'll only be for the summer. But you'll learn so much Wills, and... and you don't have to go alone. Giles could go, o-or a friend..." she said, hinting towards Tara even though she was unsure if they had even met yet._

_Willow was sure that Buffy had meant that she could take either her or Xander, but she found her mind wandering to the girl she'd seen back in the Wicca group. She wondered if it would be all that bad, if the benefits would be worth the trip, who she would take... the list of questions was endless. "I'll think about it"_

_Buffy smiled serenely, hiding the fact that inside she was jumping for joy. "That's all I ask"_

_Willow nodded and an awkward silence fell between them. She turned and walked out the door, leaving Buffy alone without saying goodbye._

Perhaps it could have gone better, but Buffy was pleased with the progress she had made with her friend as it could have gone a lot worse too. _Just think, glass half full._ Buffy sighed as she checked the clock again. She didn't want to wake Giles and he had been waking up later since he was 'between jobs'. Her knee bounced with extra energy as she waited. _It's so strange. I've been working, looking after Dawn, training the potentials, fighting every day and every night. I always wished I'd have more time to myself. Now I have and I have no idea what to do with it_ she thought, smiling self depreciatingly. _I really should be careful what I wish for._

Her smile turned sad as she thought about the sister that technically didn't exist. _Actually, that's another thing. Should I head Ben off early? Get the key made into something other than a human? I miss Dawnie so much, but... does it make me a bad person if I say life would be so much easier without her around? God, I'm a horrible person. And what about the others? Would it be right to take Dawn away from the Scoobies, Giles, Mom? She was like a little sister to Spike too. But then how can you miss what you never knew? Argh! I'm so confused!_

Shaking her head to stop the thoughts that were running away, she jumped up to grab the phone. Right then, it didn't matter if she woke Giles. She had to talk to someone and do something to take her mind off of everything else. Dialling his number, she listened to it ring and waited for him to pick up.

Buffy needed help, before she went insane.

* * *

"Hello?" a groggy British voice answered the phone.

"Hey, Giles. It's me"

"Ah, Buffy. How are you?"

"Good, you?" Buffy paced the two steps between the two beds hoping that they could get the pleasantries out of the way quickly.

"I-I'm fine, thank you. I'm glad you called actually. I was wondering if – "

"Sorry, Giles, but I have to talk to you about something. I had a Slayer dream last night but it was different to the one I had last time"

There was silence on the other end as Giles tried to figure out her sentence. "Oh, you mean it changed from what you remember?"

"Exactly. Okay, I can't remember the exact details of the last one, so I'll just tell you what happened in this one"

"Right" Giles replied, still a little baffled with the way Buffy spoke of the present in the past tense.

"I was in class, and Walsh was talking about communication, how talking wasn't the only form. Then she asked me to come to the front for a demonstration. I heard the door go and Spike was there, only Walsh called him Hostile Seventeen. But then she told him to 'be a good boy' and called him Spike, which was really weird. Anyway, he came over and..." Buffy felt her face heat up in a blush even though Giles couldn't see her. "... something happened. There was an earthquake, but when it stopped, I heard the girl singing again"

"Was is the same song?" Giles asked distractedly as he took notes on everything she was relating to him.

"Yeah, but I forgot the last bit. It goes 'Can't call to Mom, can't say a word. You're gonna die screaming but you won't be heard'" she recited, feeling the same chill she had felt before when the girl had been singing.

"Then what happened?"

"Spike tapped me on the shoulder, but when I turned it was one of the Gentlemen. Then I woke up"

"That's it?" he asked, and Buffy could hear he was sceptical about something.

"Yes" she replied slowly.

"May I ask just what the 'something' you mentioned before was?"

Buffy scowled when she heard the humour underlying his tone. _He's gonna make me say it._ She took a deep breath. "Hekissedme" she blurted out.

"I'm sorry, what?" Giles asked, not bothering to hide his amusement anymore.

"Spike said 'If I kiss you, the Earth will move'. Then he did, and there was an earthquake" she mumbled. Giles thought about asking her to repeat herself again, but decided against being that cruel.

"Right. Well, I'll take another look at what we've got so far. You say Walsh called him Hostile Seventeen?"

"Yeah" Buffy confirmed.

"Hmm"

"'Hmm'? What 'Hmm'?" Buffy asked, her voice a little more frantic than she meant it to be. In the background she could hear Spike talking.

"Buffy, I'll have to talk to you later. Spike believes he knows what it means"

"Well, he did have to put up with Drusilla for a hundred years" she said, her tone mocking. She faintly heard his indignant "Hey!" and her mouth dropped open in shock. Recovering, she practically yelled into the receiver. "Oh my God! Is he listening?"

Giles had to fight to stop himself from laughing. It was clear his charge was embarrassed about the slightly more heated part of her dream, and quite clearly didn't want the subject of her dreams to know. When he was sure he had himself under control, he spoke calmly to reassure her. "Only since he heard the term the Initiative used for him"

Buffy breathed an inaudible sigh of relief. "Okay, well I gotta get to class. The 'Evil Bitch Monster of Death' hates it when I'm late"

Giles was stunned for a moment, and confused as to who Buffy was referring to. Deciding he'd probably rather not know, he bid her goodbye and hung up.

* * *

Spike stood straight from where he'd been slouched on the wall near the phone so he could listen in to the conversation. He walked over to the sofa and jumped on it so he landed lying down. He scooted up a bit to make himself more comfortable and opened the jar of peanut butter he'd found.

"We're out of Wheat-a-Bix" he told Giles absently.

"_We_ are out of Wheat-a-Bix because _you_ ate it all. Again" Giles replied in irritation, his mind still on what Buffy had told him.

"Get some more"

Giles sighed. "I thought vampires were supposed to eat blood"

"Yeah, well sometimes I like to crumble up the Wheat-a-Bix in the blood. Gives it a little texture"

Giles removed his glasses and took his cloth from his pocket to polish them. "Since the picture you just painted means I will never touch food of any kind again, you'll just have to pick it up yourself"

"Sissy"

Giles rolled his eyes at the poor insult and walked round to sit in the armchair. He noticed then that the vampire had a faraway look in his eyes, like he wasn't focused on the present. "Spike?" he inquired quietly.

Spike blinked a few times and faced Giles, scowl fixed firmly on his face. "What do you want, Watcher?"

Giles counted to three before replying. _Stay calm, he's only doing that to annoy you._ "I was wondering if you had any insight on what Buffy's dream could mean. Earlier you said that you had an idea"

The blond visibly relaxed, though he wouldn't meet Giles' eyes and his posture still showed how uncomfortable he felt. He ran a hand through his hair and when he spoke, his voice trembled slightly. "Yeah. Uh, it could mean... well..." He sighed and finally raised his gaze to the other Brit's to stare him straight in the eye. "I think it means that they're gonna find me"

Giles surprised himself and the vampire then, as when he next spoke, the concern in his voice was undeniable. "What do you mean by 'they' are going to find you?"

"Those army blokes, the commandos. They called me 'Hostile Seventeen', but never found out m' name. 'N' the Slayer said I was in the same room as the head bitch and she called me 'Spike', righ'?" At Giles' nod, he carried on. "So, if the cryptic meanin' is anythin' similar to the kind o' visions Dru got, it means they're gonna find out who I am, 'n' they're gonna come after me"

Giles stayed quiet as Spike explained his interpretation. He didn't really want to admit it, but his view made a lot of sense, and it seemed the most likely explanation. Yet he didn't want to confirm that. He could see the fear the vampire tried so hard to cover with bravado, but it still shone through for anyone to see if they looked for it. Before he could change his mind, he found himself offering support. "Buffy won't let that happen. I don't know much about this... Initiative, but I do know her. She's a remarkable young woman, with strong values which she upholds admirably. Believe me when I say that she won't allow them to recapture you"

He didn't know why the Watcher was making such an effort, but Spike found himself feeling strangely relieved. He nodded and lay back on the sofa, going back to his snacks as Giles stood and went to his desk where all his notes were. Just as Giles sat down, Xander and Anya came walking through his front door in the middle of an argument.

"Well, I think that we should talk about it now" Anya stated.

"Thank you for knocking" Giles said sarcastically.

"If you don't know how I feel about you – " Xander began, but Anya interrupted.

"I don't! This isn't a relationship. You don't need me. All you care about is lots of orgasms"

Xander blanched, his mouth moving soundlessly as Giles removed his glasses and Spike sat up slowly to peer over the back of the sofa, an eyebrow raised and a biscuit in his mouth. Xander cleared his throat and finally managed to speak. "Okay... remember how we talked about private conversations and how they're less private when they're in front of my friends?"

Spike took the biscuit from his mouth. "Oh, we're not your friends. Go on" he encouraged.

"Please don't" Giles pleaded, replacing his glasses and raising a hand to stop whatever Anya was about to say.

Instead she pouted as she turned to him. "This is important"

"But why is it here?" he asked in annoyance.

"Mom said you wanted me to swing by" Xander answered.

Realisation dawned on Giles. "Oh, uh yes, well I meant, uh, after sunset" He stood again and turned to lean against the desk, folding his arms. "Umm, I need you to take Spike for a few days"

"What?" chorused throughout the apartment.

Spike shot to his feet and glared at Giles. "'M not stayin' with him"

"I would have asked Buffy, but she had more pressing things to worry about at the moment. You see, I have a friend coming to town and I'd like us to be alone"

"Oh, you mean like an orgasm friend?" Anya asked bluntly.

"Yes, that's exactly the most appalling thing you could have said" he responded in an affronted tone whilst Anya just stared at him with wide innocent eyes.

Xander attempted to bring them back to the topic. "He's not roaming around" he said, pointing at Spike. "He stays with me he's gonna get tied up again"

Anya turned to the brunette. "What about us, our romantic evening?"

"'M not havin' these two shag while I'm tied to a chair three feet away" Spike was adamant about that at least.

"That's not exactly one of my fantasies either" Xander retorted.

Giles sat back at his desk and put his head in his hands, sighing exasperatedly as the three of them continued to argue, wishing for a glass of scotch.

* * *

Psychology class was tense for the redhead and blonde as they both sat silently, each aware of how close the other one was but at the same time, how far away they were. They both heaved a sigh of relief as class ended and Willow used the opportunity to pack up her notes and rush out the door. Buffy was slower and called out to her to wait, using her Slayer co-ordination to navigate the busy halls and catch up to her.

"Look, Wills. I'm sorry for yelling before. I just worry, you know?"

Willow didn't look at her but she slowed her step. "Yeah, I know" she replied softly.

"So... how was your Wicca group?" Buffy asked, desperate to fill the silence. _Maybe she met Tara already._

Willow glanced at her, and smiled when all she saw was curiosity in the green eyes looking back at her. _She really is interested_ she thought happily. _Maybe this wasn't so bad after all. I guess I might have overreacted a little bit..._ "Put it this way, every girl with a Henna tattoo and a spice rack suddenly thinks she's a sister to the dark ones. They were all 'blah, blah, Gaia', 'blah, blah, moon', 'women power shrine', 'menstrual life force power thingy'. I thought we'd get into something real, but... nothing"

"Really? Not one of them was an actual witch?"

"No" Willow said dejectedly, before brightening at a memory. "Actually, there was this one girl. I think her name's Tara, and I could just sense something about her"

Buffy had to bite back the grin that threatened to emerge. Willow already sounded so excited about the prospect of meeting and talking to Tara. "That's great, Will" she said, a genuine smile on her face. "Do you think you'll see her again?"

Willow shrugged as they turned into the corridor that led to their dorm. "I don't know, but I'd like to. She seems real nice. Shy, but nice"

Buffy smiled again, opening the door to their room, stepping through and closing it after Willow. "I'm glad we're talking again by the way. We were only fighting for a day, but it was like there was this big yawning chasm between us, the kind where you can't see the bottom and... I missed you Wills"

Willow thought about everything that had occurred just yesterday. _In the end, is it such a bad thing? I'd get the guidance and help I need, and when I come back, I'll be able to help Buffy so much more. And she's just looking out for me, which is what friends do. Holding a grudge is just gonna hurt us both._ She smiled at Buffy and nodded in agreement. "I missed you too, Buffy"

They enveloped each other in a hug, tightly wrapping their arms around the other as if they were afraid they'd disappear. "I'm so sorry. Let's never not speak again, okay?" Buffy asked, closing her eyes and enjoying being this close to her friend. They'd drifted apart over the years and she'd missed this.

Willow nodded against Buffy's shoulder. "You're forgiven, and for what it's worth... I'm sorry too" She pulled back from the hug and gave Buffy a stern look. "Don't think I'm not still mad, missy, 'cos I am" Her expression softened but her eyes hinted at the sadness within her. "But I get what you were saying. I've been abusing magic to get what I want, and you're right, cookies aren't always gonna be enough" Predicting Buffy's next question, she headed her off. "This doesn't mean I'm agreeing to go to England. I'm still annoyed at you, and I think Xander is too judging by the call I got earlier. I'll talk to Giles though, get some more info and stuff"

"Info is good" Buffy said, unwilling to disturb the tentative truce that seemed to have formed between them. _Hopefully we'll just be stronger because of this._ Their friendship had withstood so much, and this obstacle would only make that bond that much more resilient. The Slayer may be destined to be alone, but this Slayer needed her friends.

* * *

Giles had been unyielding in having Spike go with Xander for the few nights Olivia would be staying with him, and they had all finally left just twenty minutes before she arrived. When she did, she received a very warm welcome. Anya, on the other hand, had to go home alone, as Spike kept making gagging sounds every time she and Xander even looked at each other.

So Xander was left to sleep in his parents' basement with just a vampire he loathed for company. He'd tied Spike to a neon orange chair that had been sat unused in the corner for an unknown period of time. He had then retreated to the bathroom to change into his t-shirt and boxers, and after a moment's hesitation he returned downstairs.

A deep voice sounded in the darkness as he pulled back the covers. "Still don't know why I have to be tied up" Spike complained, tugging on the ropes a little to see how much give they held. He had to hand it to the young man, he knew how to tie a knot as there was no way he was working his way free of this one.

"It's just while I'm sleeping" Xander said as he climbed into the bed, unsure as to why he was even telling Spike that.

"Like I'd bite you anyway" the bleached blond retorted, giving him a scathing look.

Xander lay down and pulled the covers over himself as he glanced up at Spike. "Oh, you would"

"Not bloody likely"

"I happen to be very biteable, pal. I'm moist and delicious" he said as he lay back, reaching up and turning off the lamp.

"Alrigh', yeah fine. You're a nummy treat" Spike replied, his tone thick with sarcasm.

Xander pointed a finger at him as he rolled over to try and get comfortable. "And don't you forget it"

Spike sighed and tried to relax in the chair. _Nope, looks like 'm not gonna get any sleep tonight. Anyway, 'm a vampire, I don' sleep at night. Bloody stupid gits._ He was frustrated and annoyed, but most of all, he was bored. He let his gaze travel around the room when they landed on the man in the bed and he remembered the conversation he overheard part of earlier.

He adopted a higher voice, imitating the man's girlfriend. "Xander, you don't care about me"

"Shut up" he replied shortly and without moving at all.

"We never talk" Spike continued. _Winding up the Whelp, always fun_ he thought with a grin.

"Shut up" Xander raised his voice a little more, hoping that maybe this time he'd actually listen. He didn't.

"Xander" he drawled, his voice still mockingly high.

"Shut up!" Xander exclaimed, aware that by reacting he was giving the vampire just what he wanted, but was too tired to care. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

Across town, in a tall clock tower, a group of strange creatures gathered around a small wooden box as the clock chimed twice. The leader glided forward and lifted the lid with great care. An eerie whispering filled the silence of the night as everyone in the town inhaled sharply and a white mist escaped their mouths. Still they slept peacefully, no one awaking to see all the mist begin to move swiftly towards the tower.

The white streams gathered to create a fog that seemed to move with a mind all of its own. It rolled through the town and entered the tower, pouring itself into the box still held open by pale grey hands. Suddenly, it snapped shut, and the leader of the group stood back to properly address the others. The horrid grins permanently stretching across their faces to reveal white and silver teeth and their large black and startlingly white eyes seemed to almost glow in the darkness of the night. The leader folded his hands together elegantly and nodded to the others. Each returned the nod and picked up a scalpel from the table. It was time to start collecting.

* * *

A/N: And that's all she wrote! For now that is =) Hopefully the next chapter will be up by Sunday, though I can't be certain because I have a family thing all day tomorrow so I won't be able to get on my computer.

So, until then, thanks for reading and please review to let me know what you think =D


	11. You Say it Best

A/N: A big big thanks to Sailor Sayuri, missgwen33, Seapea, Doni, Niori and dragnet for their wonderful reviews! Seriously, you guys never fail to come through, and I don't think you need to be told this, but you rock!

So, sorry for the wait, but here's the next chapter =)

* * *

Chapter 11: You Say it Best

Buffy yawned and stretched, her eyes fluttering open as she sat up. She paused for a moment, enjoying the warm sunshine that filtered through the window behind her bed. Smiling, she stood, grabbed her wash kit and made her way to the bathroom. Once she had brushed her teeth and made herself fairly presentable, she returned to her dorm, just in time to see Willow wake up. Things had been tense between them, even after their reconciliation, but if the smile Willow gave her was any indication then their friendship had survived another obstacle.

Buffy gave her a tentative smile. "Good morning" she said. At least, she thought she'd said it. Her mouth had opened, and formed words, but she hadn't made a sound. She cleared her throat with a frown and tried again. "Good morning" Still nothing.

Willow rubbed her eyes clear of sleep and stretched. She looked up to see Buffy stood there with a worried expression. Eager to make her relax and reassure her that their friendship was okay, she smiled and opened her mouth. "Hey" Willow frowned and her hand moved to her throat. When she looked at Buffy again, she could see the blonde was trying to talk to her.

"Will, can you hear me?" Buffy tried, hoping she said yes. Otherwise, it meant the Gentlemen had arrived early.

Willow shook her head, panic beginning to creep up her spine. "No. Have I gone deaf?"

"No, we just can't speak..." Shivers of fear ran up her spine as she remembered the strange beings that had stolen their voices. Buffy turned away from Willow, who was desperately yelling silently at her side, and looked out in the hall. Not one voice echoed in the usually noisy corridor.

* * *

Xander rolled over as he drifted back to consciousness, only to see Spike tied to the orange chair he detested almost as much as the vampire himself. "Great, just the perfect start to the morning" he grumbled. He froze for a second when he realised he hadn't made a sound. He frowned and sat up.

"Hello?" he tried again. "Hello?" he shouted, but once more was met with only silence. His breathing sped up as he stood and kept talking, wanting to hear something other than the quiet. "What's going on? Why can't I talk?" He opened his mouth and tried yelling again.

Spike had woken long before Xander and had watched the young man curiously, amusement sparkling in his eyes. "What are you doing, you bloody ponce?" he asked with a grin. His grin faded when he came to the same realisation as Xander, and he too started to try and make some sort of sound.

Xander spun around to face Spike. "You!" he exclaimed, shaking a finger at the bound vampire. "You did this to me"

Spike held his hands up as far apart as he could get them, silently asking 'How?' and clearly demonstrating the lack of movement he had. Xander wouldn't give up though, his enforced silence only causing his agitation to mount every minute. "I can't talk. It's your fault"

Spike sighed, bored already. If they couldn't talk, he had to take less crap from the Scoobies, so it didn't really bother him all that much at that moment. He made sure Xander was watching before sticking two of his fingers up at him, then turned his head away disinterestedly.

Xander grabbed the phone and dialled the first number that came to mind. Sure, he and Buffy had had a disagreement, but she was still the Slayer and he hoped she could help. When the ringing stopped though, he was met with just silence on the other end. He was about to say 'Hello' when he remembered he couldn't speak. Instead he removed the receiver from his ear and stared at it in exasperation. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Spike move, and when he looked up, he saw that the vampire had a single eyebrow raised. _Is he mocking me? How can he do that even when he can't talk?_

* * *

By unspoken agreement, literally this time, everyone converged to meet at Giles' apartment. When Willow and Buffy arrived, Xander and Anya were already there. At the sound of the door opened, Xander jumped up to meet them, returning Buffy's small wave and faint smile. It seemed that even losing their voices for a few hours had put everyone on edge, and was already beginning to take its toll. The air had a heavy, depressed feeling to it, and the town was eerie being so silent.

Giles approached Buffy and lay a gentle hand on her arm, which she covered with her own. She glanced up at him and saw he was giving her a meaningful look. She gave him a small nod and mouthed "Kitchen". He smiled and nodded before turning to Willow, who had removed her board and was scribbling away. She turned it around and proudly displayed the message 'Hi Giles'. The Watcher moved to her side and put his arm around her, squeezing her shoulders comfortingly.

Buffy moved to the kitchen, not watching to see if Giles would follow, knowing only that he would. When he did, they sat opposite each other at the table. She removed her board and placed it on the table, picked up her pen and started to write. Once she was finished, she spun it around so that Giles could read it.

'It's the Gentlemen. They're going to start collecting hearts tonight'

Giles scanned her note and frowned. "Newspapers?" He said silently.

Buffy shook her head and lowered it into her hands, her elbows resting on the surface of the table. "Don't remember" she pointlessly mumbled. _Someone's gonna die tonight if I don't remember where they were found..._ Buffy searched her memories, but could only recall seeing the small sections in the paper. She never read them.

Her eyes brightened as it hit her. _The guy... in the dorms. He, he got killed by them!_ Her head snapped up. "The dorms!" Giles gave her a questioning look, so she tried again. "Victim One, at the dorms"

Giles nodded but quickly frowned. He placed his hand over his throat then moved it upwards and away from his mouth. Buffy just looked puzzled. Sighing, Giles made a duck bill with his hand and opened and closed it, miming talking. Buffy smiled as she got it, but then she was bewildered again. Giles acted out the mime again and pointed at Buffy, his eyes asking a question.

_Oz was right, nobody deserves mime _Buffy thought, trying to figure out what he was saying. Exaggeratingly heaving another sigh, Giles erased her message and wrote his own. 'How do you get your voice back?' it read.

Buffy's mouth formed an 'o' in realisation and she grinned sheepishly at her Watcher. Then she mimed opening a box. Giles nodded, but still looked confused. Sighing inaudibly, she made sure she had his full attention before clearly mouthing the words "Clock tower" but frowning as she recalled having help. She jumped up from her seat and started to pace. _Last time I fought the Gentlemen, I had help from Riley... can I take them on myself? Or maybe..._

Resolutely, Buffy turned to face Giles. "Spike"

Giles was stunned at her seemingly random outburst of her adversary's name. His incredulous expression asked his question for him. She grabbed the board and pen, her hand moving rapidly across it and spinning it in her hands for him to see.

'Last time, Riley helped. If I go tonight, he won't be there and I don't know if I can take them alone'

Giles pointed at himself then at the door that led to the living room where the rest of the Scoobies sat. Buffy shook her head. "Too dangerous"

The older man scoffed and stood, facing off against her. "He's a vampire, Buffy, your enemy and not your friend. He won't help you"

She had missed most of what he had been trying to say, but had made out the last part. She stood straight and folded her arms, her expression serious. Giles was once again struck by how mature she looked, her eyes older than the body she was in after experiences that he couldn't even imagine. She held herself more surely and had an air of authority that hadn't been there before. She was about to reply when they heard the sharp sound of someone clicking their fingers. The two of them went through to the living room just as Xander knelt by the television and turned it up.

All of them watched the screen intently as the news reader gave his report. _The whole town has laryngitis?_ Buffy thought disbelievingly. _Guess people really do believe what they want to rather than what's right in front of them._ She shook her head and retrieved her board and pen from the kitchen. She hung it around her neck and returned to the living room. She gave everyone a smile and a quick wave in goodbye before leaving the apartment, heading in the direction of Xander's parent's house.

* * *

When Buffy reached the back door of the house that she knew led to the basement, she took a moment to extend her senses and enjoy the feeling of peace and security that enveloped her at the tingling sensation that indicated Spike's presence. Steeling herself to the possibility of a less than warm welcome, she knocked lightly on the door. She didn't expect an answer, but she paused for a second to be polite then gently pushed the door open a fraction.

At first, the room looked empty, but as she opened the door further and slipped into the room an orange chair came into view. Still tied to it was the blond vampire she was looking for. He was sat up straight and staring in her direction, but the slightly sleepy look in his eyes told her she had probably just woken him. She approached him slowly, smiling at him when he focused on her and at his confused look.

"Slayer?" he asked, forgetting for a moment that they couldn't speak. Buffy saw what he had said though and smiled, giving him a small nod. She walked around him and untied the ropes that bound him to the chair, her eyes curious when they met his again. Spike was even more confused at the fact that she'd freed him but shrugged his shoulders.

Buffy rolled her eyes. Xander had obviously decided that it was safer to keep Spike tied up than let him wander around. _I guess I can't technically fault his logic. I mean, Spike did try to kill him, and he doesn't know what I know._ She watched as he rubbed his wrists where the rope had cut into him a little, causing red marks to encircle them. His eyes never left hers though, observing her intently as he continued to try and piece together the mystery than was the Slayer.

Seeing his look, Buffy sat on the bed, facing him and locked her green eyes on his expressive blue ones. Her face was completely serious when she appealed to him, hoping that he'd understand the gravity of what she was asking. "I need your help"

Spike was once again wary of the woman in front of him. He'd learned long ago that trusting someone could very well get you killed, and didn't plan on becoming any part of the little group that had formed to aid Buffy. _'N' why would I help her? I wan' 'er dead._ He ignored the slight twinge he felt at the thought of her cold lifeless body. "Why?"

Buffy had hoped that he'd help her voluntarily, even if it was just to get her voice back, but had expected that he'd want something in return. Standing she dug her hand into the front pocket of her jeans and pulled out the small purchase she'd made on the way. She held it up so he could see it and saw his gaze turn calculating.

_Carton of smokes... not much, but 'm runnin' low. I could try 'n' get more out o' her though..._ He raised an eyebrow at her, silently asking if that was it. Buffy sighed and pulled several bills from her other pocket. She counted out enough to buy several packets of blood and a bottle of Jack Daniels. _Is it bad that I know how much he'll need for that?_ She wondered absently, holding up the money as well. She raised her board and wrote her message, her hand moving rapidly across the surface. She flipped it over so he could read it.

'Blood and bourbon'

He smirked at her and nodded, not registering the fact that she had known his favourite brand of cigarettes and holding his hand out for the packet and money. She placed them in his cool grasp, letting her fingers linger slightly longer against his skin and feeling the frissons of electricity that sparked between them at the simple contact. Spike was startled by the feeling, but recovered quickly, nonchalantly standing and picking up his duster from where it had been thrown across another chair. He removed a cigarette from the pack and placed it between his lips and he placed the rest of the pack in the pocket of his jacket, finding the lighter at the same time.

The click it made as he flicked it open to light it seemed too loud in the quiet room, making Buffy jump slightly. Spike chuckled silently, listening as her heart skipped a beat. She saw him grinning though and scowled, standing to smack his arm lightly, though not gently. Spike held his hands up in mock surrender and she pouted before breaking into a silly grin. Spike flashed back to the short period they had spent engaged as he replaced his lighter and returned her grin. _Shouldn' this feel more... wrong? That's what this is. We're soddin' banterin' 'n' we can' even talk! But then why is it... familiar?_ Spike turned away from her and growled, though he made no noise, his confusion mounting. He returned to his seat in the horrible chair he'd been forced to try and find comfort in and once more, vampire and Slayer sat opposite each other.

Deciding to focus on less puzzling things, Spike tapped his wrist and gave Buffy a questioning look. She held her wrist out for him to see the time, wondering why he was asking and misinterpreting his question. Spike shook his head and punched the palm of one hand with the other, then repeated his previous movement. He was slightly disturbed when he found himself noticing things like the way her nose crinkled when she was in thought.

_We'll have to meet at sunset, but where? There are the dorms then we could patrol the campus and the town. But that would put him at risk from the commandos, at least until he met up with me. I guess we could start here or at Giles'... but Olivia's still at Giles, so he probably won't want us just showing up._ Buffy mouthed "Sunset" and pointed at the floor, receiving a single nod in reply.

They sat in an awkward silence for a moment before Buffy stood and motioned towards the door. Spike nodded again and sat back in his chair. He saw the ropes and reached out to touch her arm as she passed, pointing to them when she faced him again. Buffy could see that he didn't want to get tied up again, but was also resigned to the fact that it was going to keep happening for now. She gave him an apologetic look and bound him securely to the chair once more.

With a final shared nod, they bid each other farewell, and Buffy left to head back towards her dorms and unaware of the mayhem below the campus.

* * *

All agents had been called to base via their pagers immediately after it had been discovered that the whole town had been affected. Riley and Forrest were the first two to make their way towards the debriefing, and stood in front of the mirror, standing still as the green bar scanned them and confirmed their identities.

A robotic voice sounded in the corridor, breaking the oppressive silence. "Retinal scan accepted"

The door slid to the side to allow them entrance into the lift. Forrest quickly scrawled a note on the pad he'd picked up from his room as the lift descended. He turned it towards Riley.

'It's all over town' Riley nodded to him and they continued to wait impatiently for the lift to reach its destination.

The robotic voice spoke again. "Please state your name for vocal identification"

Riley sent Forrest a frantic look before bending down and breathing hard into the microphone. "Vocal code not accepted"

Both agents began to feel panicked as the voice carried on. "Unauthorised beings will be considered hostile. Please commence vocal identification in the next twenty seconds to avoid countermeasures"

"Countermeasures?" Forrest repeated worriedly.

Riley fell to his knees and pulled open a panel in the wall of the lift. He swiped his card and typed in a number, but the light flashed and the voice informed him that the override code was not correct. Forrest held up a note to him.

'Come on! Come on!'

Riley ignored him and was about to try again when the voice interrupted him. "Lethal countermeasures engaged"

A yellow gas began to fill the lift when suddenly the doors flew open to reveal an annoyed but also possibly amused professor. Walsh beckoned the two agents from the lift and pointed at a sign.

'In case of emergency use stairway' it read.

With a small smile at the sheepish men before her, she led the way to the table where they were to have the briefing.

Once everyone had arrived, Walsh used a computer to tell the agents of the situation. They didn't know anything so far, but one thing was clear.

"You must all be in town tonight, because there will be chaos. You will help keep order. Dress as civilians. A military presence would only increase panic"

Riley wrote quickly on a piece of paper. 'What's happening?'

"We're looking into it. Go. Help maintain order. We will find an answer"

The agents all nodded to their leader and stood, ready to follow their instructions.

* * *

Buffy arrived back at Xander's basement a few minutes before sunset, armed with stakes, knives and a crossbow. She knocked on the door and was greeted by a surprised brunette.

"Buffy?" Xander asked.

She waved a little and waited for him to invite her in. Shaking his head, he moved back so that she could enter. When she turned around again, he was looking at her questioningly. She smiled and pulled out a stake, twirling it between her fingers and pointed at Spike who was watching the blonde expectantly. She bent behind him and untied the ropes, allowing Spike to stand.

Xander's eyes widened in shock and he started waving his hand wildly in Spike's direction and staring at Buffy like she'd gone mad. Buffy rolled her eyes. She pointed at Spike, then herself, then made a stabbing motion with the stake she held. Xander seemed to calm a little, but confusion soon took over again. He pointed between himself and Buffy. She shook her head, wondering what to tell him. Then it hit her.

"Anya" she mouthed. She saw that he had understood what she'd said, but was still puzzled. Rather than gesturing, she simply raised her eyebrows and gave him a meaningful look. She could see the realisation cross his face and he grinned goofily.

Smiling at him, Buffy grabbed Spike's arm and pulled him towards the door, waving again at the young man behind her.

* * *

Buffy starting walking towards the college, her eyes focused straight ahead as she didn't dare to look at the vampire beside her, lest she give something away. It shocked her when he fell into step with her automatically. She had thought it to be something that he had become accustomed to doing over time, yet it seemed that he was already in tune with her, at least to a certain level.

She glanced at him to find he too kept his gaze forward. The silence between them was as awkward as it had been earlier, with Spike wondering why she was asking for his help and Buffy unable to give him an explanation, even if they could speak. So they walked through the town, each keenly aware of the other's presence and not sure quite how to act. Especially since Willow's spell.

As they walked, they passed shops that had been broken into, cars with smashed windows, fires that had been lit in bins and fights between practically every person they met. It appeared that when arguments couldn't be solved with words, they resorted to solving them with fists. Buffy had broken up a third fight when she once again heard the distinct sound of flesh hitting flesh.

Turning, she saw Riley pull one man away from the other, spinning him away from the fight and leaving his back exposed. The other man picked up a metal bar and raised it above his head, preparing to strike as she approached. Before Riley could turn around, she grabbed the man's wrist and twisted it just enough to make him drop the bar. He fell to the floor in pain, cradling his abused wrist and cowering away from Spike when he sneered at him.

Riley turned again to see Buffy and a blond man he was sure he knew. Ignoring the other man, Riley faced Buffy. He shifted his weight, not wanting to see Buffy right now. Still, he wanted to be polite if he could.

He inclined his head in question and she nodded slightly, letting him know she was okay. "You?" she asked. He shrugged and dropped his eyes to the floor. Buffy pointed passed Riley and went to walk around him. He nodded and moved out her way with a sigh, walking in the opposite direction to continue his patrol of the town.

He glanced back over his shoulder at the retreating pair and wondered who the man was. _And where do I know him from? _His mind flicked through his different memories, trying to find the one where the man's image fit. After a few seconds, his step faltered. _Hostile Seventeen._ His eyes turned from his path ahead to the way Buffy and the hostile had gone. _Imagine what Walsh will say if she learns that I was the one who discovered and organised the recapture of Seventeen._ He spun on his heel and headed in the opposite direction, and the grinning agent began to follow the pair.

* * *

Buffy and Spike arrived at the dorm far earlier than she knew the Gentlemen would attack, but she couldn't be sure of when they would. So they patrolled the campus, stealthily keeping to the shadows cast by the trees, one on each side of the path.

Out of nowhere, Buffy was suddenly tackled by something heavy, its bulk pinning her to the floor. Her breath left her body as she made contact with the hard ground. Whatever it was, it kept her upper body down firmly and she was unable to get her hand free. It grabbed her wrists and in a surprisingly fluid motion, it flipped her onto her back. A fist hit her once, twice in the face before she managed to recover enough to reverse their positions. She straddled the demon she recognised to be one of the Gentlemen's minions and punched it hard. Unfazed, it struggled against her, finally finding leverage and throwing her off. They both jumped to their feet, and the monster advanced on her, wildly throwing punches in her direction. Buffy ducked under one and blocked another, kicking it in the head. As they continued to trade blows, she didn't notice the other demon behind her.

The demon wrapped its arm around her neck, pulling her upright and off the other as he choked her. She flailed backwards, trying to kick or punch it hard enough to loosen its grasp, but the lack of air was beginning to make her panic. The first demon had stood, had limped towards her. It pulled back its fist and punched her hard in the stomach, the other landing on her temple. She leaned backwards and kicked forward with both feet, sending the one that wasn't holding her reeling away from her. Unfortunately, it hadn't given her the momentum she'd hoped for in order to flip over her captor's back. Darkness began to flicker at the edges of her vision and she felt her strength begin to leave her.

Barely feeling her struggles now, the demon threw her to the floor and pinned an arm and a leg down, the other demon returning from where he'd been sent sprawling to pin her other limbs. Buffy lifted her head weakly to see the forms of two of the Gentlemen as they floated eerily towards her, their grins seeming even bigger than in her dream.

She gasped when they reached her side and one removed a scalpel from their pocket, renewing her struggles against the hands that restrained her. Their attention was abruptly turned somewhere else and Buffy used the distraction to pull one of her left arm free. She punched at the one on her right and lashed out with her left leg, knocking one to the floor again. She brought her head back and crashed it into the skull of the demon, stunning it. Quickly, she wrapped her hands around its head and with a harsh snap, she broke its neck. Hearing a noise, she looked up to see the other one rushing towards her. She shifted into a defensive stance and prepared for the attack, only for it to fall at her feet, a knife sticking out the back of its head.

As it fell, it revealed the figure that had killed it, and in its place, stood Spike. He swiped away the blood on his face from his nose and a cut across his cheek, wincing slightly as he did. Buffy pulled herself to her feet and cast a brief look around them. A few yards away lay another two corpses, one lay in a pool of blood and the other with its neck clearly snapped as well. She looked up at Spike, her eyes wide. He shrugged before remembering who they were. He pointed to himself, drew a flat hand that resembled a blade across his throat, then pointed at her. His message was clear. If anyone was going to kill her, it would be him.

Buffy grabbed his arm when he went to turn away, her thanks clear in her eyes. Spike searched her face for a moment before giving her a small nod. She released his arm and observed her surroundings. But the Gentlemen had gone.

She tapped Spike on the shoulder, mouthing the word "Gentlemen" at him. He frowned, sniffing the air then pointing at the door of the dorms. Without looking back, she sprinted towards the door.

* * *

Tara knocked timidly on the door to room 214 and waited for it to open. When she received no response, she tried again, and this time was met by a disorientated Willow. The redhead frowned at the other girl and tried to say something, only to yawn halfway through. Tara smiled in apology and held up the book she had brought with her. The title caught her attention: 'Spells of Speech and Silence'.

Stepping aside, she gestured Tara inside and shut the door behind her. Willow sat on her bed and patted the space beside her. Tara ducked her head as a blush tinted her cheeks. She smiled shyly and took a seat. She opened the book and together they began to read through it, hoping they could find a possible cure for the loss of the town's voice.

Before they could get very far, they heard the deafening sound of a bell ringing in warning. The building was on fire.

* * *

Buffy whirled around the corner and smashed the glass to the fire alarm. The loud siren began to blare throughout the building and students began to file out of their rooms, eyes still bleary with sleep, and made their way to the exits. Relieved, Buffy grinned and turned to face Spike. Her face fell when he looked indifferent, but inside, he was impressed.

_Girl really is resourceful_ he admitted, his admiration for her rising. _As an enemy, o' course. Nothin' wrong with admirin' 'er technique, or her body. 'M a man after all, 's only natural_ he tried to convince himself. It worked for now, but the same old arguments were beginning to lose their credibility. Though, as with many of his recent thoughts, he would only admit that to himself. To that small part of his mind that thought not of the Slayer, but of Buffy, and as much as he tried to fight it, that small part kept getting bigger.

* * *

Riley watched from his hiding place as Buffy and the HST left the dorms and ran off across the lawns. He'd seen them attacked by the demons, and had thought that perhaps they were demon hunters like himself. It wouldn't explain the presence of Seventeen, but it would explain why Buffy had been so ready to take off all the time. However, as he'd watched her fight, it had been obvious that she wasn't any ordinary girl. She was faster and stronger, and if he hadn't seen her in the sun he'd swear she were a vampire, which meant she may well be an unidentified sub-terrestrial. Walsh needed to know about Miss Summers.

Silently, Riley headed for Lowell House and prepared to give his boss the bad news. _Or maybe it can wait until morning..._

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Buffy was sneaking into the clock tower across town, Spike right on her heels. She removed her crossbow and loaded a bolt into it, the click of it fitting into place a lot louder than she had hoped for. A crunch to her right signalled the arrival of one of the henchmen, and she fired, her shot accurately hitting its target and instantly killing it. She rapidly reloaded as three others charged into the room, and a fourth tackling her from the side, causing her shot to go wide.

Buffy abandoned the crossbow and kicked the minion away from her, following it with a flurry of punches. She ducked under its arm when it swung for her and drove her shoulder into its abdomen, the force throwing it to the floor. She landed a spinning kick to the one trying to catch her off guard from behind. It flew backwards into a pile of crates, splintering the wood into thousands of pieces.

Spike heard the crash and his head whipped around to see what was going on. The minions he was holding off took advantage of his distraction and hit him simultaneously, their combined effort knocking him down. Overwhelmed from his vulnerable position, Spike had no choice but to take the beating and wait for an opening, and throwing punches blindly when he could. He struck lucky when he felt his fist hit flesh, relishing the sound and feel of bones cracking under his punch. The henchman he'd hit had been unprepared for such a powerful blow, and its head snapped back, breaking its neck. It slumped sideways to the floor, falling against the remaining minion. Spike jumped to his feet and shook the blood from his eyes. He bounced on his toes, grinning madly and beckoning the demon to attack. It rushed forwards as he'd hoped, but he hadn't noticed that he'd been played. The unconscious minion lay upon the broken wood, several pieces sticking upright dangerously right behind him.

Buffy eventually dispatched her opponent in the same way she had the previous one, its head twisted at an unnatural angle. She spun to face the others, and saw what was about to happen. She screamed as flashes from the Hellmouth invaded her vision. _I did not get sent back here just to watch him die again!_ She yelled in her mind. Without another thought, she was running.

The vampire ducked the punch and saw the minion duck its shoulder, ready to drive him backwards, but was too late to stop it. Bracing himself for the blow, he was stunned when a blur of blonde and black smashed into its side, sending the two of them sprawling. He was pulled out of his shock when an arm wrapped around his neck and flipped him. He grunted as he landed hard on his back, flipping to his feet less than a second later. He grabbed the minions arm as it attempted to punch him and swung with all his strength. The henchman was thrown bodily into the wall, once again knocked unconscious.

The minion was difficult to take down. The blonde kicked it in the side and head, punched it in the stomach and spun low, kicking its feet from under it. Still, it got up and came back for more. Buffy retreated and jumped up on a box near a wall, grabbing a rope that was hanging down from somewhere in the rafters. She kicked against the wall to gain momentum and landed a hard double kick to its chest. This time it didn't get back up. She whirled when she was tapped on the shoulder, instinctively throwing a punch.

Spike cried out in pain as her fist slammed into his nose, breaking it again and knocking him to the floor. _Christ! Next time I'll bloody clap or somethin'_ he thought, not accepting the fact that approaching the Slayer like that when she was in battle mode was probably not the best idea.

The blonde fell to her knees beside him, wincing herself when she saw the state his nose was in. "Oh God, I'm sorry" she said, though she knew he couldn't hear her. She pulled his hands away from his face and gingerly felt his nose, making sure it would heal straight. Anger quickly overtook her though. "You know, that was your fault!" she shouted, jumping to her feet. Spike gaped at her, matching her anger and standing as well.

"Bloody well was not! You punched me!" he retorted.

"You snuck up on me!" she yelled back. It didn't seem to matter that not one syllable touched the air. They could understand each other perfectly.

"Soddin' ungrateful bitch. I helped you!"

"And I helped you!"

Spike fell literally silent at the reminder of what had happened. He'd seen the wood when he'd faced the other minion and had realised how close he'd come to a dusty ending. But Buffy had saved him. The Slayer had saved a vampire from that fate, and he hadn't a clue why she had. He changed from angry to confused and curious in a split second, but Buffy was still fuming. She turned away from him and continued through the tower.

Just then, another lackey appeared from the shadows, holding a barrel. It knocked Spike down from behind, the thud of his body hitting the floor catching the Slayer's attention. She ran down the stairs and punched the minion as hard as she could. It fell backwards, rolling away from her. It jumped to its feet and charged past her, retreating up the stairs she had started up. Spike groaned and rolled the barrel of him, standing slowly and rubbing his back. Heavy metal objects to the spine were never a good thing.

Giving him a cursory glance, Buffy saw he wasn't too badly hurt. She sent a small smile in his direction as she passed him, before sprinting up the stairs. Spike sighed and followed after her.

* * *

Up the stairs, Buffy saw the table she remembered from before, only there were more empty jars this time. She smiled, thinking about the people she hoped she had saved. A foot suddenly hit her squarely in the back, and she was knocked forward. Two other henchmen appeared either side of her and the three of them held her still. Two Gentlemen floated out of the shadows, gliding slowly towards her. One was waving a scalpel, the point aimed for her chest.

_Not twice in one night!_ She thought as she frantically fought against the arms that restrained her once more. The Gentlemen never reached her though, as they were tackled by a swirl of black leather. Spike spun and kicked one of the lackeys holding Buffy, sending him flying across the room. Buffy flipped, kicking a fourth minion and breaking the others' grasp on her arms. _Jeez, how many of these things are there?_

Spike grabbed a metal bar and brought it crashing down onto one of the minion's head, the blow stunning it. He grabbed it and threw it over the rail, the dull sound of it hitting the concrete below music to his ears. He swung again, hitting one of the ones advancing on Buffy, turning its focus to him.

Buffy ducked a poorly aimed roundhouse kick and landed her own on its back as it passed her. She ducked another from the other minion, and delivered a powerful uppercut to its jaw, knocking it to the floor where it stayed, unmoving. The henchmen behind her picked up the scalpel the Gentlemen had dropped and turned towards her. She sensed the movement just before the searing pain spread through her back, her flesh tearing as the blade slid inside. She screamed silently, weakened and unable to fight effectively as the lackey threw her against a spool of rope and pinned her there.

The one Spike had hit with the bar approached him quickly, no method to his advance, and Spike wondered how intelligent they actually were. This time though, it didn't make the first move, instead simply standing just within arm's reach. When Spike lunged, it evaded and grabbed him, throwing him backwards into the wall. Recovering swiftly, he jumped back to his feet. _All righ', looks like they know a few things after all._ He feinted with his right arm, bringing his left around to land a solid punch when it moved. He grasped its shoulders in a strong grip and threw it against the wall in turn. _See how you like it, mate_ he thought with a grin. He sighed when the lackey got up again. _What does it take?_ He thought exasperatedly. He was about to see what creative methods he could come up with to kill them when the strong and sweet scent of Slayer blood reached his nostrils. He didn't understand the rage that flooded him with his hunger, but he used the rush to smash the henchman's head into the bell that chimed the hour. The force made the bell ring loudly, and the lackey slumped to the floor.

Buffy heard the sound and saw the minion go down. She turned her head as much as she could to try and see the box she had seen before. Spotting it, she clapped her hands to get Spike's attention. Only he was a little preoccupied. The weight behind her vanished as Spike grabbed the lackey's head and snapped its neck, throwing the body to the side. Buffy collapsed, gasping for breath, but Spike caught her before she hit the floor. Setting her right, he stepped backwards, unsure of what it meant that he instantly missed the warmth of her touch.

"Box" she choked out. She stumbled to the table and opened the small ornate box, releasing the white mist stored inside. As soon as she felt her voice return to her, she took a deep breath. Then she screamed. The high pitched wail resounded in the room, and the Gentlemen all covered their ears in a vain attempt to stop the inevitable. One by one, their heads exploded in a mess of green goo. Buffy and Spike grimaced at the destruction, and slowly turned to one another.

Buffy offered him a soft, if slightly nervous, smile. "Hi" she said, and was glad to be able to hear her own voice.

"Hi" he replied, not knowing what else to say.

"We should get out of here" Buffy said quietly.

Spike nodded, and together, the unlikely pair exited the clock tower and once again made their way towards a young man's basement.

* * *

Riley had been relieved when he had woken up the next morning to hear the usual sounds of people laughing, joking and yelling beyond the door to his room. His happiness was short lived when he remembered what he had seen the previous night. He dressed quickly and walked to his superior's office. He knocked on the door and waited for permission to enter. When he received it, he gently pushed the door open and shut it behind him.

"Yes, Agent Finn?"

"Professor Walsh... we need to talk"

* * *

A/N: And that's it for now, folks!

As you can probably tell, now that I've gotten to the point that I want to be in, everything is going to start changing from canon quite dramatically. I may keep various things the same, depending on what they are and whether I think they'll mesh with my storyline, but hopefully everything will work out okay =)

Thanks for reading, and please review to let me know what you think!


	12. Doomed Again

A/N: Big, big thank you's to everyone who's read this fic, and to missgwen33, Niori, Doni, Naeara, Sailor Sayuri, Linwe Ferland, WingedGirl4Life, soulcop83, Seapea, Blade Redwind and spicy-pink for their wonderful reviews!! It was officially the most reviewed chapter, and I was so amazed at the amount I had to do a happy dance XD

Blade Redwind: Thanks so much for your suggestion, and I hope I did it right and that this is a bit clearer =)

I'm so sorry about the lack of an update ( Bad, bad Jay!! ) but it took me a while to figure out how much of 'Doomed' I wanted to keep and what to change and to get everything so I was happy with it. This chapter's almost the same really, in terms of events, except Spike and Buffy need to talk this time...

* * *

Chapter 12 : Doomed Again

"So you say you saw her exhibit supernatural strength and speed" Walsh stated, her voice rising slightly to make it a question.

"Yes, ma'am"

"And could this behaviour have been possible to duplicate as a human?"

A muscle in Riley's jaw twitched as he clenched his teeth. He knew what he'd seen, but at the same time... "Yes, ma'am"

"But you also say that you saw her with the hostile. That they... protected and aided each other, correct?"

Riley nodded, annoyed with the constant interrogation that just repeated what he'd said. "Yes, ma'am"

"Do you know where they are now?"

Riley shook his head. "Negative. Miss Summers is staying in Stevenson Hall but I don't know where she's hiding the hostile"

Walsh nodded slowly as she thought. "Very well. You are to keep an eye on Miss Summers and see if she leads you to him. If necessary, we'll bring her in for questioning. Is that clear, Agent Finn?"

"Crystal, ma'am"

"Good" Walsh watched as one of her best agents turned to leave the room. "I'm counting on you, Riley" She gave him a rare smile and looked back down at the paperwork in front of her, silently dismissing him. Riley nodded and left without another word.

* * *

Buffy had tossed and turned all night, unable to sleep. She had known that she'd have to talk to Spike sooner or later about everything that was going on. It was times like this that she really hated how perceptive he was. _Or maybe I'm that obvious..._ she thought with a sigh. Still, she'd greeted Willow and watched as the redhead got ready before leaving for the library. Now she was sat on her bed, wringing her hands nervously and debating on whether she could go and see the vampire now or not. She jumped up and started pacing as she tried to get her thoughts in order so she could decide on what to say to him when she saw him. Finally, she couldn't take it anymore. A sound of frustration escaped her as she grabbed her jacket and made her way out of the dorms.

Her determination took her all the way to Xander's door, but suddenly all her courage left her. She stood there, staring at the closed door without making a move to knock or open it. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she raised her fist and knocked before she could think twice about it. The door swung open and she fixed a smile on her lips.

Xander looked surprised to see her and she gave him a little wave. "Buffy, what are you doing here?"

Buffy kept her smile in place, but it began to tremble a little. "Uh, well Wills went to the library. Something about nineteenth century literature, so I stayed behind, got bored, thought I'd come see you," she smiled brightly at her brunette friend, clasping her hands in front of her.

"Why?" Xander asked, his eyes hard. "Willow's not talking to you so you thought you'd try me? Well I'm busy right now. I have a job," he said coldly, going to shut the door in her face.

"Willow forgave me. Look, I went about it all wrong, but we're okay now. Are _we_ okay though?" She asked, pointing between them. She got no answer, and sadness filled her as he looked down. "Could I at least come in?"

He stood back and opened the door further to let Buffy past him and into the basement. "So, what happened?" He asked shortly.

Buffy's mouth worked silently for a second, her eyes locked onto Spike as her exited the bathroom, still running a comb through his newly gelled hair to straighten out his unruly curls. He gave her a curious look and waited for her answer. She shook her head and tore her eyes away from his, her cheeks colouring in a blush and she cursed that he could have that effect on her just by looking at her.

"I explained to Wills what I thought my dream meant, and about how the trip will help her. I don't want to send her away, Xander, but trust me when I say that it's what's best for her. For all of us," she replied, hating the slight begging tone in her voice but unable to help it.

"How can I trust you, Buffy?" Xander asked exasperatedly. He went to continue but Buffy stopped him.

"How dare you?" she asked darkly. It was too reminiscent of the time they'd thrown her out of her own house because they didn't trust her judgement. Except she'd been right. "When have I ever led you wrong? I am a leader, I am the Slayer, and I know what I'm doing. Question me all you want, but _never_ believe that I would intentionally hurt you or get you hurt"

"That's all great on paper, Buff, but – " Xander was interrupted by a loud barking. Confused, the three occupants turned to look at the door. "That's weird. Rover never barks,"

Spike had been riveted by the argument between the two friends, and the power radiating off the petite woman made his skin tingle. He could see, feel and hear the experience she had, the strength she held. And he couldn't help but admire it. She'd been through so much and clearly come out swinging every time.

The bark drew him from his reverie and he felt it a fraction of a second before the other two, and grabbed their arms. "Over here," He pulled them towards the doorway to the bathroom, ignoring the twinge of pain the chip sent through his brain when he squeezed Xander's wrist a bit too hard. As they moved, the floor began to shake, increasing with intensity with each shake.

Xander and Buffy braced their backs against each side of the frame and Spike placed his palms one each side next to their heads to balance himself. Items tumbled off of surfaces and the sound of the Earth grumbling beneath their feet grew louder. Buffy closed her eyes tightly, her knuckles white as she clutched the frame behind her.

Slowly, the rumbling decreased again, the Earth stilling and becoming silent again. After a moment, Xander scowled at Spike and knocked his arm away. "I've gotta get ready for work," He grabbed his clothes from where he'd set them on the bed and made his way back to the bathroom to see that neither of the blondes had moved.

Spike had noticed that Buffy hadn't moved at all, her eyes screwed shut and her breathing too fast. Her heartbeat rang in his ears, beating erratically. He lowered his arm and stepped back to give her some room.

Xander forgot his anger as he approached his friend and gently touched her arm. "Hey, are you okay?" Her eyes didn't open and her breathing was still fast. "Buffy?" He tried again, and this time, her eyes snapped open. She looked seriously spooked, but she nodded at him slightly and walked into the main room. "Well, okay..." He trailed odd, unconvinced.

Buffy sat on the bed and ran a hand through her hair. Spike stood just outside her peripheral vision, leaning against the wall and fidgeting nervously. He didn't know if he should ask her if she was all right, or whether he should stay quiet. He shouldn't care after all, right? But... he did. Something had changed yesterday. Before that even, though he didn't know what. And it was scaring the hell out of him. So instead, he stayed quiet, waiting for her to say something. When he couldn't take the silence anymore, he opened his mouth.

"Slayer – " What he was going to say, even if he didn't know what it was until he'd said it, was lost. The pipes that ran along the ceiling groaned and creaked ominously. There was a moment of silence before the quiet sound of drops hitting the floor echoed in the room.

Xander came back out and grumbled under his breath, raising it again to address the bleached blond. "C'mon, Evil Dead. Help me pick some of this stuff up" He started picking up some of the smaller objects from the floor, thanking the fact that he had nothing breakable. He righted the phone and a pile of comics, turning to see the vampire still stood in the same spot. Xander sighed and grabbed a few pots from a corner by the washing machine. "At least stop the drips" He said, tossing them to him.

Spike caught them reflexively, his jaw clenched as he tried to restrain his anger. He was William the Bloody, Slayer of Slayers, not a slave to a weak human. Just then, the piped directly above him started to drip too, the first hitting his head. He stepped to the side and placed a pot on the floor, moving about the room quickly and putting them down under the broken piping. As he approached the stair, he noticed that one of the drips was above his chair.

He grabbed a hold of the arm and dragged it to the side. "Soddin' sleepin' chair's bleedin'... sodden" He frowned and glanced at Buffy who had yet to say a word.

Xander slid the last pan he held into place beneath the leak and grabbed his hat from the side. "The quake just knocked a couple of pipes loose. There's a wrench hanging up over there by he workbench. Try tightening the coupling"

"Do I look like a plumber to you?"

"No, you look like a big mooch that doesn't lift a finger around here. But I have to get to work" He paused, facing Buffy instead. "Are you sure you're okay, Buffy?"

Buffy lifted her head and smiled weakly at him. "Yeah, I'm fine, Xand. Go on, go to work," she said, attempting a light tone.

"Yeah, deliver melted cheese on bread and do your part to keep America constipated" Spike quipped, glaring at the young man. Buffy couldn't stop the genuine smile that curved her lips and she had to stifle the giggle that rose up.

"Mock not. Remember who pays for the plasma around here, pal," He picked up the wrench and handed it to Spike. "You earn your keep or you don't get kept" Spike took the wrench and Xander turned away again. "When you're done fixing those leaks..." He continued.

Spike lifted the wrench behind his head, his eyes burning into the back of Xander's head. Buffy caught the movement and whispered his name practically inaudibly. He just heard it with his supernatural senses and turned his head to her. He met her pleading green eyes and nodded, lowering his arm as Xander turned again.

"... Try cleaning up this mess, and doing a little laundry for once wouldn't kill you," He looked Spike up and down in disdain. "Unfortunately," He added.

Xander smiled at Buffy and bid her goodbye, apologising again for having to leave her alone. Then he ran up the stairs, causing an uncomfortable silence to fall over the remaining duo, punctuated only by the odd drip of water as it landed in a pot or pan.

"I guess we have to talk," Buffy began quietly, dropping her eyes to the floor again.

Spike shifted her weight uncomfortably then sat down awkwardly on the bed next to her, clasping his hands and leaning forward with his elbows resting on his knees. After a few moments of silence, Spike decided to start. "Why did you help me?" Buffy just looked puzzled, so he expanded. "At the tower. One o' those lackey's was gonna kick me into the wood, but you tackled it. Not jus' that. You knew all my moves, fought beside me like we'd been doin' it f' years. And finally, why were you worried 'bout me after you punched me?" He turned to her, the questions he'd asked and those left unvoiced swirling in the blue depths of the eyes staring back into hers.

Buffy searched his gaze, seeing the confusion and desire for answers, but she also saw the slight fear at what those answers were. "You're not ready to know," she told him, her voice low as she averted her eyes.

"Maybe not, but I need to. You're confusin' the bloody hell out o' me, Slayer," he replied.

"You wouldn't believe me anyway," she said, her left hand itching as her right idly traced the lines of the scar that would mark her hand forever in the future if she couldn't prevent it.

"_No, you don'. But thanks for sayin' it"_

"Try me"

She returned her gaze to his, an excuse on her tongue. But when their eyes locked once more, she knew she couldn't lie to him. She'd done that for too long. She stood, pacing away from him a little. "A lot happened between us, Spike" She sighed, closing her eyes briefly and pinching the bridge of her nose. She shook out her arms to loosen her muscles and tipped her head back.

Spike never took his eyes from the weary blonde. "Like what?" His patience was beginning to thin, and he wanted answers.

"Long story short..." She paused and took a deep breath. She walked around until she was stood in front of him and kneeled down at his feet. She met his eyes steadily, letting him see how serious she was and aware of the irony of her situation. "I love you"

Spike blinked, then blinked again. Deep chuckles resounded in his chest as a grin spread across his face. "You? You, the Slayer, love me, a vampire?" His chuckles grew in volume to full blown laughter. Buffy stood up and away from him again, folding her arms defensively and dropping her eyes from his. Each mocking sound cut her deeply and if she had to see the amusement in his eyes as well then she knew her heart would shatter completely. "You're completely off your bird"

Buffy spun around to face him again, remembering a past conversation that hadn't happened yet. Her expression softened, allowing every single emotion burning inside her show in her eyes for the first time since she'd awoken in her past. He could see the sincerity, the love she'd spoken of and the hurt rising in her emerald eyes. They began to glisten with unshed tears, however, it wasn't enough to douse the fire back in her emerald eyes and burning brightly. "It's not so unusual," she said, her voice soft but firm. He quieted as he saw how serious she was, his laughter dying away. "Two people, in the workplace, feelings develop"

"No, they don'. 'M not on your team, 'm evil!" He said lightly, laughter still escaping his lips occasionally.

"You can't deny that there's something between us," she tried, her voice still quiet.

Spike eyes widened in disbelief, his laughter dying down. "Seethin' hatred is wha' i' is," He was practically shouting at her as he stood up.

Buffy stepped forward, meeting him toe to toe. "Heat... desire" She leaned up and tilted her head back, bringing her face a whisper away from his. His eyes turned hard again, and he gripped her upper arms ready to push her away. But the warmth of her breath on his lips, the look in her eye and the way her body fitted with his were all weakening his resolve. His grasp on her arms faltered, becoming a hold as he pulled her towards him a little instead of pushing her away. Buffy sensed him relax slightly and leaned closer, placing her mouth near his ear, her lips brushing it as she spoke in a hushed voice. "Did you ever ask yourself why we were in love?"

There was no reply, but Buffy could tell he didn't understand. "We were engaged, but Willow only ever said we should get married. So, Spike... why were we in love?"

Spike came back to his sense then and threw her away from him, clenching his jaw as the chip shocked him. Shaking his head as the pain stopped and his mind cleared, he glared at her. "Please, I'm a vampire," he said, stating the obvious.

"Angel was a vampire," she said, climbing to her feet and leaning against the wall.

"Angel was good," Spike spat in disgust.

"And you can be too," She wasn't going to give up easily.

"What, this chip?" he asked her incredulously, pointing to his temple. "This is jus' holdin' me back. When I get it out, I'll bathe in your blood" he said menacingly, his eye darkening with malice.

Buffy laughed humourlessly. "You won't mean that forever, even if you do now. Whether you like it or not, this is real. It's not pretty, and it's messy, and hard, but it's real. I love – "

"Don't," he demanded harshly, raising a hand to stop her. Only two people had ever told him they loved him, and both had turned out badly. He had turned his mother into a demon, effectively destroying her love for him. And Dru had left him after he had spent over a century devoted to her. He couldn't stand to hear those words from her lips, spoken by his enemy.

Buffy's composure broke as he backed away from her, putting the bed between them. Hot tears spilled down her cheeks, burning because of his denial of her love. Once again, she had failed and he didn't believe her.

Spike folded his arms again, but this time it was to fight the desire to go to her. To comfort her, brush her tears from her face and kiss her pain away. His emotions were in turmoil, he didn't know which way was up and he was drowning. Drowning in his thoughts, thoughts of her. He was drowning in her. His closed his eyes and tried to get himself under control, but was pulled from his confused mind by her voice.

"I'm not asking you for anything, I just... in the future I'm from, I did some really bad things. So bad, that when I told you, you didn't believe me. Then something happened that led to me being sent back here. So I had to tell you now because there's no way that I can pretend that I don't feel anything for you," She swiped the tears away and sniffled. "And I know that you don't remember any of this, but I want you to know that I'm gonna make it better," she finished, impressed that her voice had only wavered slightly.

He looked like he was going to protest further, but was stopped by the shrill ring of the phone. Buffy jumped at the sudden sound then walked towards it, taking deep breaths to steady herself. "Hello?" She answered.

"Xander? Listen, I was at the library during the earthquake and I can't find – " Willow's panicked and hurried voice stopped as abruptly as it had started. "Buffy?"

"Yeah, it's me, Wills. So you can calm down now," Buffy reassured her, smiling a little at her Willow-babble.

"Oh, well that's good. But what are you doing at Xander's? And where is he anyway?"

"I just came over to... check on how the Spike-sitting was going and stuff. I was here during the earthquake," she explained, keeping her voice fairly flippant and casual.

"Oh, okay. Well I almost got buried in the library. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Xander has a few leaky pipes now, but no biggie. How's the dorm?"

"A couple of broken knick-knacks, but nothing much. Porter dorm's completely blacked out though, so naturally they're dealing with the crisis the only way they know how. 'Aftershock' party," Willow told her in an amused tone.

Buffy grinned, despite still being aware of Spike being so close to her, yet so far. He had retreated to the bathroom and shut the door behind him, effectively shutting her out as well. "Ah, this from the dorm that brought us the 'Somebody Sneezed' party and 'The Day that Ends in 'Y'' party," Buffy laughed quietly, remembering the excuses the infamous dorm had used to throw a party.

"They do seem to be pretty generous with their milestones. You gonna go?"

"I guess, but you go on ahead. I'm on my way for a little Giles one on one," she replied.

"Anything wrong?"

"No, I don't think so. I mean, last time there was an earthquake, I died. So I'm a little wigged, but nothing I can't handle. There's just some research-y stuff I wanted to talk over with him," She didn't want to lie to Willow, so she had tried to make her voice as uncaring as possible.

"Oh my God! Should I meet you there? I'm gonna meet you there," Willow decided.

Buffy tried to catch her before she hung up the phone and called down the line, "Wait! Willow, wait!" She listened for a moment and didn't hear the dial tone so she carried on. "Seriously, everything's under control. You go to the party, I'll talk to Giles, and I'll meet you there," she said.

It seemed to appease the redhead, though she was still uncertain. "If you say so..." he voice trailed off.

"Yes, I do. So go. I'll see you soon, okay?"

"Yeah, okay. Bye, Buffy," Willow replied. Buffy said her goodbyes as well and they hung up. Buffy glanced up towards the door behind which she could sense Spike's signature. She walked towards it slowly, her breath hitching as she choked back her emotions. Gently, she placed her hand on the cool wood and rested her forehead on it, feeling his essence through the door.

Unbeknownst to her, Spike mirrored her position, his hand level with hers and his head resting on hers. He focused on his senses on her, her scent, the sound of her breathing, her heartbeat and her blood rushing through her veins. He could almost feel the heat of her body burning through the door and into him. He sighed when he felt her moved away and opened his eyes, noticing only then that they'd fallen shut. He turned and rested his back against the door, listening to her leave.

Spike slide down the door and pulled his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around them. He ducked his head, rolling his forehead on his knees and groaning. _When did my un-life get so complicated?_ He asked himself. But he knew the answer. It was when he came to Sunnydale and first laid his eyes on the golden goddess destined to turn his un-life upside down.

* * *

Buffy arrived at Giles' to see him sitting outside with a map and a cup of tea much like she had as she remembered. Just as before, he seemed fixated on finding the Initiative base rather than listening to her fears of apocalypse. As he tried to once again distract her with his ideas on the commandos, she had to stop him.

"Giles!" She shouted. His wide eyes shot to hers. "I know all about the commandos, where they're base is and what they're planning. I haven't decided how I'm going to deal with that yet. But for now, trust me when I say that this earthquake was a sign of the end of the world. Three Valhalla demons, or something like that anyway, are gonna use the blood of a man... something else, and a talisman called the Word of Valios. You have that, so they're gonna be coming here, but first I'm gonna go to the party and see if I can save the guy," she told him in an authoritative voice.

Giles was stunned for a moment, unused to his Slayer taking charge of a situation in such a way. "Uh, umm, well yes. That seems like a good plan of action. Erm, g-good work, Buffy"

She smiled at him, but he was again taken by surprise by the raw emotion and weight of her eyes, and he wondered if her burden would ever lighten enough to allow the spark of her lost youth to burn again. Buffy nodded and turned to leave, jogging up the steps and towards the college. It was time to party.

* * *

Xander climbed the stairs down into his basement, a pizza box balanced precariously in one hand. He looked up when he reached the bottom and his mouth dropped open. The drips from before hadn't stopped, and more had opened up. The only thing that had been done about it was that there were more pots placed strategically around the room.

"Oh, no! Spike, this place is worse than when I left! You didn't even fix the drips!" He exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air and beginning to turn to look for the vampire. He was stopped by his voice.

"Don't turn around," came his low voice. His tone worried Xander and he started to imagine all the different horrible things that could have happened.

"Spike, what is it? What happened?"

"Don't look at me," he said quietly.

Xander turned slowly to face him, his eyes widening when they landed on the blond. Spike had changed into a pair of his shorts and a Hawaiian shirt that he had forgotten he owned. The sight was so surreal that he couldn't help the chuckles that escaped him.

Spike despondently held up his clothes so Xander could see the problem. "I shrunk them. Bleedin' shirt, trousers," he threw them into a corner and glared at Xander. "I hate this place," he added.

"You know, I'm not any happier about you wearing my stuff than you are," Xander said, trying to fight down the grin still on his face.

"Go out, get me some decent stuff. And I want more blood," Spike demanded.

"No! You're not a guest," Xander stared at him for a minute, wondering if he was really being serious.

Spike stepped forward, glaring again at the young man. "You want me to tear this place apart, you bloody poof?"

"That's it! I am way past due with you," Xander stepped forward to meet him, stalking towards the smaller man with a menacing look on his face. Spike backed up instinctively, and hating himself for it. Quickly, he put on the mask of indifference and amusement he'd mastered over the years as Xander continued.

"I hate to break it to you, oh impotent one, but you're not the 'Big Bad' anymore. You're not even the 'Kind of Naughty'. You're nothing but a waste of space – my space! And as much as I always got a big laugh watching Buffy kick your shiny white ass, as much as I know I can give you a little ass-kicking myself right now, I'm here to tell you something," He paused, looked Spike up and down and sneered. "You're not even worth it. I'm out of here," He spun around and went into the bathroom, not looking back once.

That cut him more than his words. The brunette had turned his back on one of the most dangerous and infamous vampire ever known. He'd left himself vulnerable knowing there was nothing Spike could do to hurt him. He really was useless, pathetic. _Doesn' mean anythin', poncey git's jus' spoutin' off 'cos o' his own issues. _He hated Harris for the things he said, but more because of how they made him feel, and hated himself the most for letting Xander make him feel that way. He tore his eyes away from the door and looked off to the corner, clenching his jaw as he tried to reign in his emotions again.

As much as he tried to fight back with everything in him, one thought was prominent. _He's right._

* * *

Buffy ran inside Porter dorm, evading the drunk and stumbling co-eds, looking frantically around for anything suspicious. _Damn, I don't even know what he looks like! Where do I start?_ She jumped up to try and see over all the head, her blonde hair swinging as she did. She grumbled when she couldn't see anything helpful.

_Let's see, if I were a demon looking for a guy to kill and bleed out, where would I go?_ She paused for a moment before turning and pushing her way back towards the back of the house where she had spotted the kegs near the beginning of her frenzied search. O_kay, I'm in the quietest part of the party. I mean, this is where that girl got killed in Scream, right?_ She glanced around, hoping to catch sight of... something. Suddenly, a scream rang through the dorm from one of the upper levels.

"Willow," she whispered, making her way in the direction of her friend's distress as quickly as she could. She grabbed one of the people running the other way, grasping them firmly. The young girl looked terrified and she fought against Buffy's grip. "The girl who screamed, where is she?" The girl just babbled nonsense through her tears but pointed down the hall in the opposite direction to everyone's movement. "Thank you," Buffy released her and pushed past the fleeing students.

As the last people left, Buffy could hear a quiet sound. There was a girl sobbing behind one of the doors, and she followed the noise to one of the opened doors. Propped up on the bed was a dark haired man, the symbol of an eye in a pyramid etched into his chest with lines so fine that they must have been done with a blade. The red mark went deep into the skin, but no blood dripped from them. He'd been completely bled dry.

_I was too late. _Buffy swallowed hard and looked down to see Willow sat on the floor, hunched against the wall. Her gaze was fixed on his face, his eyes wide open and lips parted in a silent scream. "C'mon, the police will be here in a second," Buffy bent down and reached for the redhead, gently pulling her to her feet.

"Buffy, did... did you see him? Oh God! I found him, o-on the bed with me. He was dead! And, and... and Percy called me a nerd!" Willow scowled, despite the circumstances as Buffy led her from the room.

Buffy bit back a small smile. "Nice priorities there, Wills. Hey, I'm gonna take a look around and see if I can find whatever did this. Are you gonna be okay?"

Willow's smile trembled a little, and her nod was hesitant, but Buffy knew she'd be okay. _Looks like I'm going hunting_ she thought sadly, her thoughts still on the man she was too late to save as she ran out into the night. She never noticed the camouflaged men tracking her.

* * *

A/N: And that's it for now =)

So please review to let me know what you thought, and I'll try to update sooner this time ;)

Jay


	13. Making a Move

A/N: I'm really sorry about the lack of update, but it seems that my muse has left me for a while, not to mention that I have had some trouble sleeping lately. Other than that, I have no idea why this chapter was so hard to write, but hopefully no it's done the story will be easier to move on =)

So I apologise again for the wait, and I hope you enjoy the chapter!

* * *

Chapter 13 : Making a Move

Graham opened the door to Riley's room without knocking, and was attacked unexpectedly by an orange flying projectile. He sighed when he saw Forrest's bright grin as he scooped up the soft ball.

"Good block. You should use your face more often," Forrest told him jokingly.

Graham didn't smile at his friend's humour. "We have an alpha code blue situation."

"One of ours?" Riley asked, the two agents suddenly serious as they stood up.

"Negative. Civilian at the Porter dorm party," Graham reported.

Forrest frowned. "HST attack?"

"Cannot confirm that. I couldn't get close enough without drawing attention to myself," Graham shifted his weight and dropped his gaze briefly. Riley wouldn't like it, but he was his superior and he needed all the information. "Someone was spotted leaving the scene, and I put tails on them."

"Good. We need to know where they're going, if they're involved. Have they been identified?" Riley watched Graham intently, looking for any signs of lying.

"Possible suspect is female, blonde hair and about five foot three," Graham paused for a moment. "It's Buffy," he added quietly.

Riley froze for a second. He knew there was something off about the petite woman, but he couldn't help the fact that he still felt drawn to her. "Alert Professor Walsh. Tell her we have a casualty of an indeterminate nature and meet us when you've spoken to her. Forrest and I will join the others tracking her now," he ordered, grabbing a jacket and leaving the room with the other two following after him.

* * *

Large scaly hands pressed against the cold wood of the door, heaving it open. It crashed against the wall, the sound deafening in the silence of the cemetery. Night had fallen, and there was no one around. The demon took a moment to look around and let his eyes adjust, and went to step forward when he spotted the sarcophagus to the side of the crypt. His progress was halted by a small but strong hand on his shoulder, throwing him backwards unexpectedly.

"So is that how you get your kicks, preying on the dead?" his attacker quipped as he staggered to his feet, disorientated from the throw.

Buffy stood still, her muscles tense and ready for an attack but outwardly appearing calm. She placed her hand on her hips and affected an uninterested expression. "I mean, sure, that's what I do. After all vamps equal dead. But c'mon, they're not exactly goin' anywhere," she jabbed her thumb over her shoulder towards the crypt.

The demon growled and lunged for her. Buffy had been expecting it and side stepped, easily evading the attack. She spun and hit it in the back with her elbow as it passed her, knocking it to the floor. "Where's the challenge?" she asked, walking towards the fallen demon. "Oh yeah, here," she told him, grabbing his shoulder's and tossing him again.

He recovered quickly, jumping to his feet to face the oncoming threat. He adopted a defensive stance and waited for Buffy to make the first move. She obliged, throwing a right hook and following fluidly with a left uppercut. The demon ducked the first, only to have his chin meet her other fist, the force of it lifting him from his feet and sending him flying backwards. His back hit a tombstone and he collapsed to the ground, unable to move and climb back to his feet whilst he caught his breath.

Clenching his teeth, the bristles on his head hardened and stood out, the growl rumbling through his chest as his temper grew. He flipped to his feet, ignoring the pain, and glared at the blonde as she walked casually towards him. He aimed a punch for her head and brought his other fist round in an arc level with her abdomen. She didn't fall for the feint and jumped backwards and out of reach.

Buffy watched the fight almost in slow motion, seeing the fists coming towards her and whistling through the air where she'd been standing moments before. A small sad smile curled her lips as she thought about all the times she'd usually had her partner beside her. That's what he was, is, or will be. Her partner, in every war. Her equal. It was only now, as she did a back flip to avoid a kick and spun out of the way of a punch, blocking the next and landing her own, that she was struck once more by how much she'd taken for granted. He was always there, looking out for her and looking after her. He made things interesting, and his banter kept her from being bored as it filled the quiet nights.

Green eyes dulled as the Slayer focused on the fight at hand. She leapt on top of another tombstone, using the leverage to jump higher and spin up to kick the demon in the head. Battered and bruised, he fell to the floor with a grunt. He struggled to regain his feet, feeling the warrior's presence behind him. He reacted too slowly though, his responses sluggish from the beating he'd received. Buffy stepped up behind him and wrapped her arms around his neck to grip his head firmly on either side. He began to fight her hold, but he was weaker and she easily held him still.

"Any last words?" She asked, feigning interest. The demon tried to pull away but she held fast. "No? Well, okay," she shrugged, and flexed her fingers to adjust her grip. She never saw it coming.

The demon relaxed seemingly in defeat, but when she leaned forward a little more, he struck. He swung and arm round, the sharp claws of his right hand embedding themselves in her left side. Buffy gasped, her whole body tensing at the searing pain in her side. Her mouth moved silently, her right arm coming around her abdomen and pressing against the wound. She stared down at the blood on her fingertips in disbelief, not quite understanding what had happened.

Malicious humour glinted in his eyes as the demon ripped his claws from her body, relishing her scream of pain. Realising he wasn't in any shape to finish this fight, he climbed to his feet and ran off into the darkness. Buffy absently watched him go, unable to do anything except watch as the world slowed down again. Her legs buckled, losing their strength. She fell to her knees, her hands beginning to tremble and her wide eyes fixed on the red stains on her hands.

* * *

Xander had left Spike alone after a phone call from Willow had beckoned him to the Watcher's place. Stuck inside, Spike had paced the small space until he felt he'd go mad from the limitations now on him. He was useless, pathetic, reduced from a feared and powerful master vampire of the Aurelius line to begging for asylum from the Slayer in order to gain protection from humans. He should be out there, tearing the throats out of unsuspecting victims, listening to their screams of pain fill the night. Instead, he was inside, dressed in the worst outfit imaginable and debating the words Buffy had spoken to him, telling him of days to come where he would apparently see the woman she was and fall in love with her. But everything about that was wrong. He still loved Drusilla. _Yeah, mate, but are you _in _love with her anymore?_ A small voice in the back of his mind asked him.

He growled and grabbed as stake from the collection Xander kept in the basement. Staring at it for a moment, he secured it to the lone table in the centre of the room and climbed up onto the sofa. _Time to take m'self out of a world that has her in it. _He spread his arms and took a deep breath. "Goodbye, Dru. See you in Hell," he said softly, his eyes on the stake and his escape from the blonde Slayer.

Before he could fall, a felt something burn in his chest. The warm feeling spread through his veins and seemed to focus on his right hand. Glancing down at his hand, he half expected it to be on fire. He gasped as an image shimmered before his eyes.

_A cavern. Sunshine. A blonde woman, her green eyes hard with steel yet wide with fear. Her features soften as she whispers to him words meant for his ears alone._

"_I love you," she tells him, her voice soft and full of emotion._

He rocked backwards slightly and shook his head. _What the bloody hell was that?_ He wondered. In the silence, he heard the call of his blood, felt it pulling at him. He didn't know why, only knew that he'd always trusted his instincts and always followed his blood, and he was still undead. He couldn't say why, and he knew he shouldn't, but he jumped down from the sofa and left the basement. He'd probably get staked by those uptight white hats when they discovered he'd gone off, if he didn't get captured again first, but he knew he had to go. That it had something to do with the blonde woman. Something to do with the Slayer.

* * *

He stalked between the headstones, his eyes sparking with gold as his kept his senses alert for anything and everything. Spike scanned the cemetery, still asking himself why exactly he was there and hoping he could find the answer. The back of his neck tingled and he glanced nonchalantly around, his enhanced eyesight allowing him to see further in the dark than a human. He sniffed the air, letting the different scents fill his mind. _Trees, dirt and stone... not exactly thrillin'. Three fledges, two Vahrall demons... and a soldier in a pear tree_ he sung to himself ironically as he turned his head slightly and focusing on the bushes a hundred yards ahead of him. The distinctive smell of the Initiative hung heavily in the air, their heartbeats thundering through the night for anyone, or anything, looking for them.

Spike swallowed hard, pushing down the terror that rose unbidden within him. He turned and was about to retreat when it reach him. The sweet and rich smell of blood made his fangs itch to lower and his demon to roar. There was only one type of blood that could possibly smell that good. Without thought, he ran in the direction of the soldiers and towards the source of Slayer blood.

* * *

It felt like she was watching herself from outside her body, but at the same time, not. She saw through her eyes, but she was detached, numb and unfeeling. She wasn't aware of the arms that banded around her before she hit the floor, laying her back slowly and gently cradling her against soft cotton and a hard chest. However, the feather light touch on her forehead as an errant wisp of hair was brushed away from her face brought her back.

Blinking hard, she returned to herself and the face above her came into focus. "Spike?" she whispered in wonder. She smiled softly up at him, touched by the worry clear in his eyes even as he tried to hide it. The pain flooded into her an instant later and she cried out.

Spike had seen Buffy on her knees, swaying and about to fall to the ground, and he hadn't hesitated. Pushing the memory of the image of the fire in her emerald gaze as the world collapsed around them, he caught her in his arms and lowered her back carefully. He still had no clue what he was feeling, but he knew right now that everything inside him was telling him to help the small woman who held so much power, in more ways than one. Her eyes were unfocused and she was blinking slowly and irregularly.

Gently, he moved a loose strand of hair back from her face. "Buffy," he breathed, the sound no more than an exhalation of air. He watched her intently as she blinked hard and her eyes cleared.

"Spike?" he heard her whisper. Suddenly, she gasped and her body tensed as she cried out. He glanced down and saw the crimson stain spreading across her white top. He pressed a hand firmly over the wound, wincing as she yelled again.

"We've gotta get out o' here, Slayer. Those soldier boys are about 'n' I don' fancy gettin' caught again" She nodded against him, grimacing when he stood with her in his arms. He took care not to jostle her, but it seemed that the wound was deeper than it appeared. "Let's get you back to your Watcher, pet," he spoke to her quietly, keeping her with him.

"Spike..." She began, fighting the black spots that appeared at the edges of her vision. _I will not pass out, I will not pass out... _she chanted to herself.

"Yeah?"

"What – " She cleared her throat and cast a brief look to the shirt her cheek had been pressed against, her question changing. "What are you wearing?" she asked incredulously, her eyebrows rising in amusement. She started to giggle at his indignant expression but it pulled her stab wound, sending a new wave of pain through her and she sucked in a sharp breath.

"'S not far, we'll be there soon, luv. Wan' t' tell me how this 'appened?" he asked, not looking down at her as he asked but instead keeping his eyes straight forward.

"I got cocky, I guess. Quipping instead of snapping," she said lightly, her hand tightening over the wound. "Demon stabbed me with its claws and next thing I know... I can't move. It was like everything slowed down. Then..." she trailed off, her eyes unfocused again. "I just froze. I should have reacted, I know, but I was taken by surprise, I guess," she mumbled, burying her head into the crook of his neck.

Buffy felt him tense, pulling her out of her thoughts, and moved back a little so that her head resting on his shoulder as he carried her. "I'm sorry," she apologised quietly.

"'S okay," he replied awkwardly, not looking at her.

She wanted to break down and cry, to feel the safety she yearned for and could only find in his arms. Buffy clutched the shirt he was wearing in her free hand tightly, realising she'd have to let him go for now. She slowly released her breath and her death grip on his clothing. "You can put me down," she murmured.

He finally looked at her and frowned. "That wound looks pretty deep, pet."

Buffy just shook her head. "I can walk. I'll be fine."

Gently, he lowered her to her feet and steadied her when she swayed. He glanced nervously about again, the scent of the soldiers still lingering freshly in the air. "C'mon, luv. We've gotta get goin'."

She pulled away from him slightly when he went to put an arm around her but gave him a grateful smile. She took in her surroundings but couldn't find any sign of which way the demon had gone, sighing when she realised that was probably a good thing considering her injury. Huffing a breath upwards to blow the stray hair out of her face, she nodded to Spike and began walking, the vampire automatically falling into step with her.

After a few moments of silence that wasn't quite comfortable, Buffy cast him a sideways glance and spoke up. "I remember that outfit, you know," she stated, her amused voice quiet in the night air.

"O' course, you bein' from the future an' all," Spike threw her a mock offended look. "'N' you couldn' o' bloody warned me?" Buffy snickered at him and grinned unrepentantly.

"Guess I'm the evil one after all," she replied, no trace of apology in her voice and grin still curving her lips.

"Oi! 'M still evil," Spike insisted vehemently, scowling at Buffy when she rolled her eyes and nodded just to appease him.

"Right. You're the Big Bad Neutered Vampire," she retorted sarcastically, emphasising the last two words and causing his scowl to deepen before his expression cleared. He turned to her and leered, curling his tongue behind his teeth.

"Oh, don' you worry 'bout that, luv. 'M not as... neutered... as you'd like to think," he drawled, moving his hand slowly and seductively down his chest to hook his thumbs in the belt loops of the hideous shorts he wore. He smirked when her gaze heated and followed its path down to where his fingers were spread over his groin.

Buffy gulped and raised her eyebrows, her skin burning form the various memories that assaulted her. She shook her head and shot him a weak glare. "You're a pig, Spike," she said unconvincingly.

"You wound me, pet," Spike mocked, clutching his chest with a hand. "Jus' breaks m' heart."

Buffy grinned at him and resumed walking, her hand going to her side as she winced slightly.

"Not lookin' so hot there, Slayer," Spike spoke up, watching her warily as she continued on.

"It's not as bad as it looks. Hurts, yeah, but I've had worse," she reassured him and smiled. After a moment, she glanced up at him. "Did you happen to see which way the demon went?"

Spike shook his head but sniffed the air around them, quickly identifying the scent that he could also detect on the girl next to him. "No, but one went that way," he pointed in the direction they were walking in. "And the other went that way," he said, pointing to their left.

Buffy frowned. "Why's he going that way?" She muttered to herself and, after a moment of deliberation, changed their direction and began jogging the way he had indicated.

Spike kept up with her and gave her an appraising look. "You sure, Slayer?"

"Careful there, Spikey, or I might get the wrong idea and think you care about me," she teased as she increased her speed a little in challenge.

He caught up, matching her pace perfectly. "Never," he claimed.

Buffy's grin didn't falter in the slightest. "Well, you know what they say. 'Never say never'."

His retort was lost as she turned serious, skidding to a halt as they watched the Vahrall she had been facing exiting another crypt. "These guys just don't give up, do they?" She asked rhetorically, but Spike shook his head anyway.

"A lot like a certain blonde I know," he replied, glancing at her with a grin, which Buffy returned.

"Back at'cha."

"So, I can..." Spike trailed off questioningly, inclining his head slightly towards the demon.

"Be my guest," she motioned forwards and nodded.

Spike approached the Vahrall warily, watching him carefully in case he made a move. He was awarded for his patience when the demon took a swing at him, which he automatically blocked. Bracing himself for the pain, he pulled back and let swing, landing a powerful punch to the demon's head. His hand shot to his temple, but after a moment, he realised Buffy had indeed told him the truth.

"No pain," he said to himself, staring between his fist and the Vahrall climbing to his feet. "I can hurt a demon!" He let his demon come forth and felt his face shift as he morphed into his vampiric visage. He threw several more punches and a roundhouse kick in quick succession, not giving the demon a chance to block, evade or retaliate. One last kick to the head, and the demon dropped, the bag he had managed to hold onto falling from his grasp.

"Yeah, that's right. I'm back, and I'm a bloody animal!" Spike yelled, lifting his head and roaring at the stars. Bending down, he wrapped his arms around his opponent's thick green neck and twisted with all his strength. A sickly crack sounded in the quiet of the night and the demon fell still, his neck snapped.

The victorious blond stood over his fallen foe, breathing heavily and enjoying the rush of adrenaline that made his muscles hum. Bouncing on his toes, he scanned his surroundings. A slow clapping caught his attention.

"Nice work, luv," Buffy said, attempting to imitate his accent.

Spike couldn't help the grin that formed as his face changed back, gold melting into blue. "Thanks, pet. Jus'... don' try 'n' do the accent, 'cos that was jus' soddin' terrible."

She shrugged and returned his grin again. "So, what did Mr Valhalla have in his sack of goodies?" She picked up the bag that he had been carrying and peeked inside. "Oh," she simply said, struck speechless by its contents. She entered the crypt that it appeared the demon had robbed the bones from and replaced them as best as she could. _I'm so sorry_ she prayed silently, hoping that the child hadn't been disturbed as their bones had been.

Exiting once more, she found Spike stood outside where he was leaning casually against the wall of the crypt and smoking a cigarette. Without a word, he dropped the cigarette and ground it out with the toe of his boot and fell into step with the young woman as they began walking again.

"I hate to tell you this, Big Bad, but you just helped stop an apocalypse," Buffy cheerfully informed him.

Spike's eyes grew almost comically wide, his mouth opening and closing without a sound as he hoped that she was joking. When it became apparent that she wasn't, he finally spoke. "Oh, balls."

* * *

"Enter," she commanded, lifting her head from her work.

"Ma'am, my team's just returned from tracking the suspect," Riley reported immediately.

"Yes, I can see that. So what do you have to tell me? Agent Miller informed me that you believe the suspect to be Miss Summers," Walsh inquired, her suspicions about her student rising with each report she'd received that night.

"Correct, ma'am. Me and Agent Gates joined the team already following her and observed her. She stopped in a graveyard to confront an HST that is now suspected to be the culprit of the murder at Porter dorm. They fought, and she gained the upper hand, only to be injured before she could kill it. The HST ran off, and left her there. However, she was then joined by another HST, who helped her up and began carrying her. We didn't hear most of their conversation, but we concluded that they must have been close," he stated monotonously.

Walsh just nodded, absorbing what he had to say. "Did you capture the HST that she was unable to terminate?"

"No, ma'am."

She frowned and clenched her teeth, questioning her soldiers' abilities. Disregarding the matter for now, she continued. "And the HST that joined her?" She asked, appearing uninterested at the answer, although she thought she knew what it must have been.

"It was Hostile Seventeen, ma'am," he replied.

Maggie's eyes flew to Riley's at his tone. "And you haven't captured them?" Her voice was as incredulous as her gaze. His orders were to capture the hostile if Buffy were to lead them to him, which it seemed she had. Yet they had done nothing.

Riley's eyes dropped to the floor. "No, ma'am. I thought it best to report back to base and gain further instructions," he answered quietly but firmly.

She raised a hand to her head and rubbed her temple. "I want you to find the other HST and capture it. As for Seventeen and Miss Summers, keep track of both of them. If you see them together again, I want you to bring them both in. Is that clear, Agent?" Walsh ordered, her voice deceptively calm and her eyes hard.

"Yes, ma'am," Riley replied, knowing he'd failed her and determined not to do so again.

* * *

Willow stared after Buffy as she ran off, her eyes wide as she wondered what she should do. She stilled her trembling hands and stood, her resolve face firmly in place. _Giles will know what to do _she thought to herself, and soon enough, she was at Giles' apartment. She arrived and immediately called Xander, telling him she'd update him when he got there.

Together, the three of them sat in the living room and she relayed the events of the party. "It just made me feel like I was right back in high school," she finished miserably.

"Dumb jock! If it wasn't for you he still would be," Xander defended her with a scowl and put a comforting arm around her shoulders.

Willow frowned and leaned into his touch. "I mean, I know the Percy thing isn't really important, it's the dead guy on the bed."

"Yeah, that's bad, too," he agreed reluctantly and not a little guiltily.

"Oh, and something else. He, the dead guy, was, was propped up, like whatever killed him wanted to drain the blood out of him. So I'm thinking that whatever took a bunch of the guy's blood with it," she paused, her tone turning indignant. "And I haven't been a nerd for a very long time! Hello dating a guitarist! Or I was," the redhead grumbled.

Giles turned his eyes to the ceiling and sighed before trying to get them back on track. "Tell me about this symbol."

Willow grabbed a pen and a yellow napkin from the coffee table in front of them. She unfolded it and began to draw what she'd seen. "Right, it was carved into his chest, like a big creepy eye."

Xander looked over her shoulder at her sketch. "It's kind of the CBS logo. Hey, could this be the handiwork of one Mr. Morley Safer?"

Giles tried not to sigh again in his exasperation with the young man. Looking at the drawing again, he finally realised where he'd seen it and closed his eyes tightly. It was just as Buffy had said it was. "It's the end of the world."

Xander and Willow didn't miss a beat. "Again?" They asked disbelievingly.

"It's ah, the earthquake, that symbol, yes." _I should have taken more heed to Buffy's warning. What was it she said? I had something..._ He stood and walked to his desk, scanning the titles of the books there. He opened one to flip through the pages, trying to find what he was looking for. _Vahrall demons. 'Slick like gold and gird in moonlight, father of portents and brother to blight'... _he read to himself.

Willow interrupted his thoughts as she stood as well. "No, i-it can't be. We've done this already," she whined in complaint.

"It's the end of the world, everyone dies. It's rather important really," Giles stated sarcastically, irritated with their approach to the impending apocalypse.

Willow started at his tone but became serious. "So what do we do?"

"You say Buffy went after the demon?" Giles asked distractedly.

She nodded before replying verbally. "Yeah, she did. You think we should wait for her?"

"For now. Willow," he began, looking up from the book. "Have you ever heard of something called the uh, Word of Valios?"

Willow frowned for a moment before nodding slowly. "Yeah, I think I've read that somewhere before." She grabbed a book she'd been reading whilst she had been telling her story. "Here," she said, finding the correct page. "A ritual that requires the blood of a man, the bones of a child and the Word of Valios," she told him, turning the book so he could see the picture.

The older man felt the blood drain from his face. "Oh, as usual, dear." He turned and opened a box that he kept in his weapons chest and searched through it, pulling out the talisman that the demons would be coming for. Willow and Xander's eyes fixed on the small item as well, their expressions mirroring Giles'.

"Giles, why do you have the apocalypse-making talisman here at your house?" Xander asked nervously, his brown eyes wide with anxiety.

"I-I-I bought it at a sorcerer's estate sale years ago. I've really only glanced at it once. I thought it was a knock off," he answered quietly.

"Uh, guys?" Willow slowly backed away further into the apartment, fearful eyes staring towards the kitchen. Xander gulped and followed her lead, moving as far from them as possibly.

Giles slowly turned around to face two Vahrall demons. Everyone seemed to freeze for a second before both demons attacked simultaneously. One punched Giles in the temple, allowing no time for him to possible block the blow. He fell to the floor unconscious and the demon growled as he bent to pick up the talisman that had fallen from Giles' hand. The other roared at the two remaining humans and charged forward.

Willow squeaked in fear and threw her hands up. "Protego!" She yelled instinctively, as she ducked her head and shut her eyes shut and felt the surge of magic flow through her.

A blue wall of energy materialised in between the two teenagers and the demon. The force threw the demon back, but the force reflected back, knocking Xander backwards too. The brunette hit the bookcase behind him, falling to the floor as well.

The second demon picked himself up and glanced at the other, who held up the Word of Valios. Growling to each other, the two of them fled the apartment.

As silence fell over the building, Willow opened one of her eyes, her arms still outstretched. Relaxing when she saw that the demons had gone, she cautiously opened both eyes and glanced around. "Xander? Giles?" She inquired timidly, looking between the prone forms of her friends. "Oops?"

* * *

Buffy and Spike arrived at Giles' to find the two men sat on the sofa with ice packs held to their head and a restless witch flitting between them. The blonde pushed the door closed behind them and took in the damage to the apartment.

"I'm too late, aren't I?" She asked quietly.

Giles stood when he heard her voice and walked around the sofa to greet her. "Not to worry, Buffy. We've figured out what the ritual does. They're going to open the Hellmouth, the one below the old school library," he said, trying to keep his voice comforting.

Buffy nodded. "But I was late. Again. What happens if I can't stop something bigger?"

Her Watcher stepped forward and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Everything will be fine, Buffy. You got through it before, and that was without the knowledge you know possess."

"Yeah, and look how well that turned out," she huffed, dropping her gaze.

"You're being too hard on yourself. You can't stop everything, and you're not expected too," Giles continued, removing his hand as she went to sit down. He frowned when he noticed her wince. "You're hurt?" He asked, sending an accusatory glare at the vampire by the door.

Spike held his hands up. "Don' look at me, mate. Found 'er in the cemetery fightin' a Vahrall demon," At Giles' surprised look he smirked. "He's dead."

Giles nodded absently as he returned his attention to Buffy who had pulled her shirt up a little during their brief discussion. "It's not too bad. Some bandages would be nice though," she said with a smile.

"Yes, of course," he replied, retrieving the correct items from his bathroom. A short time later, and Buffy was all fixed up and ready to go again, despite the rebuttals from Giles.

"Spike killed one, but there's still too more," she turned to face Willow and Xander. "Guess we're going back to high school."

* * *

The four of them cautiously entered the burned out ruins of Sunnydale High School, glancing around at the black walls and weak structure.

"Be careful, you guys. This place doesn't look too stable," Buffy warned them as they progressed down one of the many halls.

"Fine with me, I hope you all go under," Spike replied, his voice holding less contempt than they had become used to hearing. Three identical glares were shot his way but he just shrugged them off.

"Okay, when we get to the library, keep your eyes open for sacrifices. They may have found someone to replace the one Spike killed," the petite Slayer commanded.

"Will do," Willow agreed as Xander nodded.

"Okay, you guys ready?" She asked as she moved to the front of the group.

"Let's rock and roll," affirmed Xander, following their leader.

"Let's rock and roll," mocked Spike, shaking his head. Xander glared at him again, but kept quiet, turning his gaze instead to the walls around him.

"Sunnydale High," he reminisced. "These walls, if they were still walls, what stories they could tell," he said, his voice slightly dreamy. He was pulled from his memories as he stepped in something that crunched beneath his feet. "Ew!" He exclaimed, catching everyone's attention. He looked up sheepishly at their faces. "Mayor meat," the brunette explained.

Buffy and Willow wrinkled their nose and the four of them continued walking. "I think we're near the library," Willow stated, peering around at the unrecognisable building.

Around the corner, they turned into what must have been the library. Even if they were unsure, the large crack in the floor with the two Vahrall demons kneeling beside it chanting may have been a big help.

"Woah, check out the new floor plan," Willow quipped nervously.

"Time to stop this," Buffy said before jumping down and landing gracefully on the floor below. She tackled the nearest one to the floor, causing it to drop the bottle it was carrying. Xander saw and followed after her, grabbing the bottle and evading the fight.

Buffy blocked the first few punches thrown, but one got under her guard and caught her in the side. The fresh pain that flooded her sent her to her knees with a pained yelp. Out the corner of her eye, she saw the other demon approaching her and the one in front of her about to attack again. Lifting her arms, she stopped the punch aimed for her head and swept the legs from under the one to the side of her. She rolled away, ignoring the pain from her earlier wound. She watched the demons cautiously, taking note of which one held the Word of Valios. Identifying it as the one to her right, she executed a perfect spin kick, the force behind it sending him flying to the other side of the room, where it lay unmoving.

Willow rushed over to the unconscious demon and scooped the other ingredient from the dirt. "I've got the talisman," she shouted, darting back to safety.

As Buffy kicked the demon, she noticed Spike come up next to her and take one the remaining one. He punched it solidly in the face, knocking it backwards and away from him.

Xander retreated back against a wall as he saw the formerly unconscious demon flip to his feet and head straight for him. The demon grabbed him by his shoulders and punched him repeatedly in the stomach. "You've got the wrong man, dude," Xander ground out between punches. "I've had a lot of practice with my lunch money."

Still, the blows were enough to wind him and he accidently dropped the bottle he was holding. The demon caught it and ran towards the hole. With no hesitation, he jumped into it. Xander stared after him in confusion. "Okay, I guess I won."

The ground began to shake and they fought to keep their balance. Xander looked about to see Buffy sitting on the floor and grasping her side as she leant back against the wall. Immediately, he was at her side. "Buffy, are you okay?" He asked worriedly.

She nodded and gave him a small smile. "Yeah, just takin' a break," she joked, nodding towards the fight going on a little away from them.

Spike yelled out as he fought, the pleasure of the violence filling him. He punched, blocked, kicked and whirled like he hadn't in a long time. It was about time he had a decent fight. He kicked the demon in the chin and he fell back, sprawling on the floor. He hand morphed again at some point, so his grin revealed his fangs and seeming all that more evil. His eyes burned with a feral gleam as he moved forwards again. Unfortunately, the earthquake had caused some of the building to weaken further and a beam fell from the ceiling. Spike collapsed under its weight, and was held there as the heavy wood pinned him to the floor.

"We've gotta get out of here. The building's gonna come down," Buffy shouted. She ran forward to meet the final demon and punched him in the side before kicking him behind the knee and sending him to the floor again. Fear for her friends gave her strength and fuelled her movements. A few moments later and there was another dead demon.

She spun on her heel, prepared to help Spike, but was surprised by the scene that met her eyes. Xander and Willow had each grabbed one end of the beam and between them had managed to shift it far enough to free Spike's arms. The vampire had then gripped it and thrown it off him like it weighed nothing.

Xander stared at him for a moment, silently asking why he hadn't done that before, until Spike explained with only one word. "Leverage."

The brunette turned to Willow for confirmation. She just looked at him with a small smile and nodded, so Xander rolled his eyes and said nothing. Buffy brushed herself off and glanced at the other three to make sure no one was hurt. Turning as one, they made their way back out of the old high school.

Xander and Willow walked side by side, as Spike and Buffy walked behind them. The blonds kept casting looks at each other when they thought they weren't being noticed, one full of love and sadness, the other filled with confusion and a not yet forgotten hate. The small group walked in silence, until eventually one of them broke it.

"It's kinda weird being back, isn't it?" Xander asked.

Willow looked around again at the familiar but different halls. "Yeah. Everything seems so small," she paused and frowned at the blackened building. "And more charred and ruin-y," she added.

A few more moments of silence followed before someone spoke again. "Hey, this is where me 'n' you fought for the first time, Slayer," recalled Spike as he glanced each way down the hall in recognition.

"Shut up, Spike," Xander replied predictably, but Spike's gaze turned to Buffy's.

Her smile was fond as she thought back to the times when all she had to worry about was Parent-Teacher Night and the Big Bad was Spike himself, but had felt like it was too much to handle. She'd seen and been through so much since then. "Yeah, it is," she agreed, smiling softly at Spike, who averted his eyes uncomfortably. Silence fell again as the group continued on their way.

* * *

Riley and his group watched as the four exited the school. Making a decision, he turned to his team. "I'm going to try and get the others away from them and isolate the hostile. Summers as well if I can," he said, keeping his voice as low as possible.

"Is that such a great idea, Riley?" Graham asked carefully.

"Only Buffy knows who I am, the others don't. They're civilians and have nothing to do with this. If I can get them separated, we can take them down."

Without waiting for a response, Riley left his position and approached the group. "Well, hey! Willow, and... Xander, right?" Riley greeted them with a charming smile. "Buffy, it's good to see you."

At their curious and disbelieving looks, he continued. "Jeez, what are the chances, huh? I was just passing by and thought I heard people inside," he finished lamely. For some reason, their stares were beginning to make him nervous.

Back in their hiding places, Graham and Forrest shook their heads and sighed. "And I'm the one that got a 'D' in covert ops," Miller grumbled quietly as Gates agreed silently.

"Passing by in your G.I. Joe outfit?" Willow asked innocently.

Riley glanced down out himself and inwardly cringed. _How did I forget something like that?_ He berated himself. "Paintball!" He blurted, thinking on his feet. "Yeah, I was playing paintball. And then the aftershocks..." he trailed off and forgot about trying to convince them. "Can I talk to you, Buffy?"

Buffy shot a quick look to Spike and just caught the almost imperceptible shake of his head and the warning in his blue eyes. She sent him and the others a quick reassuring glance and nodded. "Sure, Riley. What is it?"

Riley looked down and shuffled his feet before meeting her gaze again. "Privately?" He saw her apprehension and played to it. "If you'd like, you can let your boyfriend listen. It's just, uh..." He glanced at Willow and Xander. If anything though, this got Buffy's hesitation increase. _Why would he want me and Spike alone?_

The tension was broken by a laugh. Xander tried to breathe but hysterics had him struggling for oxygen. They were all staring at him strangely, and he got himself under control. "Spike's not Buffy's boyfriend," he said, his amusement obvious in his voice.

"Oh, well," Riley looked back to Buffy. "Could we talk then?"

Slowly, Buffy nodded. "One second," she said before pulling the other three a little way down the path. "Something about this just isn't right," she whispered, and they all nodded. "Listen, I want you to go home. Spike, stay with Xander for another night seeing as they don't know where he lives. Willow, I need you to act natural and go back to the dorms and I'll see you there later."

All three looked like they were about to protest, but stopped at her look. "Be careful on the way home, you may be tracked depending on if he's alone or if he has people with him."

"What do we do if they do follow us, Buff?" Xander asked.

"I run," Spike answered quietly.

Xander shot him a surprised look before determinately turning back to Buffy. "So we don't get tracked."

Buffy smiled gratefully and nodded. "That's the plan."

"How will we know if you're in trouble?" Buffy's smile wavered a little as she looked at Willow to answer.

"I won't come back. But if that happens, do not come looking for me, okay? We have no idea what they might do with witches, and they're looking for you," she finished, facing Spike.

"What about me? I'm nothing special," replied Xander. Usually he hated being the only one that couldn't really contribute other than fighting, and even then he had no powers. But now it was a blessing.

Buffy smiled sadly, her eyes sombre. "Do you really think they'll believe you if you tell them that?"

Spike had remained oddly quiet throughout the discussion but nodded then. "Slayer's right, it'll be too risky," he said, grabbing the other two's arms and turning them to face the other way. He began walking, pulling the others with him and calling over his shoulder. "We'll see you later, pet."

Buffy smiled and nodded, making a show of waving before spinning around and walking back to Riley's side. "Sorry about that. We were just on our way to the movies and they were upset that I was bailing. But it's cool, we'll meet up another time," she smiled widely as she babbled, finally getting herself under control. Giving him an expectant looked, she asked, "So, what did you wanna talk about?"

* * *

"What? Spike! We can't just leave her if something happens!" Willow exclaimed, careful to keep her voice down.

Xander struggled against his grip and Spike tightened it, wincing as the chip shocked him slightly again. "O' course we won'," he growled. "But do you really think now is the bloody time for discussin' it? If somethin' happens," he continued, emphasising 'if', "we'll figure it out then. Right now, we gotta go. 'Specially seein' as there are three soldiers followin' us."

Both fought the urge to look around. "One each," Xander said and Spike nodded.

"They're probably hopin' I'll go off alone, so they can take me down."

"Why don't they do it now?" asked the redhead timidly.

"'Cos they don' wan' civilians knowin' 'bout their lil' operation," the blond explained slowly. "Do you know how to glamour yet, Red?"

"Y-Yes, but Buffy said I should try not to use my magic unless necessary," she replied, remembering the way her protection spell had in fact hurt her best friend.

"Trust me, luv. It's necessary." Spike pulled them into and alley and down a few shortcuts until they were suddenly outside the Bronze. The three of the slipped inside and became immersed in the crowd. Once they were in one of the darker corners of the club, Spike turned to Willow. "Now, Red. Make us look different," he ordered.

Willow stammered and tripped over her words a few times, but eventually, she calmed herself enough to remember the right chant. Moments later, the trio appeared no different. She smiled at Spike's questioning look, made nervous by the impatience also there. "Don't worry, it worked. I feel it. We look the same to each other, but different to everyone else. Now we're ordinary faces that won't exactly stick out in a crowd," she explained, her voice not betraying her and sounding confident, and was pleased it had worked how she hoped.

Just then, a man came up t them dressed in the same coloured outfit, though slightly more casual, that Riley had been wearing. "Hey, I was just looking for some of my friends. Have you seen 'em? Uh, a redheaded girl, guy with bleached blond hair and another guy wearing an orange body warmer? It's kinda hard to miss 'em if you see 'em" he grinned disarmingly and waited patiently, to all appearances looking to be doing exactly what he claimed to be as he continued to scan the club for his 'friends'.

"Sorry, man, haven't seen anyone like that come this way," answered Xander, dropping his voice a little to disguise it.

"You could try by the bar though," Willow chirped helpfully, including a girlish giggle and batting her eyelashes. The two men stared at her as the soldier thanked them and walked off. "What? Okay, so I kinda made myself look like your typical stereotype blonde. I panicked!" She tried to justify herself, her cheek colouring as she dropped her eyes.

"Wait, what do we look like then?" Xander asked, almost dreading the answer.

"Well, you're kinda like the typical jock. Kinda like Larry, I guess," she mumbled, hoping Xander wouldn't hear her.

"You made me look like a dead gay jock?" Xander asked, his eyes widening further when she nodded.

"Wait, what do I look like then?" Spike wondered, not liking the fact that she hadn't dared look him in the eye since Xander had brought the subject of their looks up. She shook her head, refusing to answer until she heard a low threatening growl rumble from the vampire's chest.

"Just don't kill me, okay? I was under pressure, and I just did the first thing that came to mind."

"What was the first thing that came to mind, Willow?" He asked, his voice dangerously calm.

"Well, you're a vampire, right? And when I cast it, another vampire came to mind," she began evasively.

Spike closed his eyes slowly and rubbed his temple with his left hand. "Please tell me you di'n't. Please tell me you di'n't make me look like the soddin' Poof," Spike's voice was still calm and quiet, making Willow squirm more than if he were shouting at her.

Instead, she smiled brightly. "I didn't make you look like the 'Poof'," she replied.

Spike groaned and a muscle in his jaw twitched as he tried to keep his temper under control. "You mean to tell me that I look like my bloody ponce of a grandsire!" He exclaimed, the volume of his voice steadily growing.

"I'm sorry, okay?" Willow shouted back. "You should know that I don't work well under severe stress or traumatic situations. Remember the whole, 'bottle in face' thing , a-a-and the whole 'Will Be Done' spell!" Spike sighed and waited for Willow to calm down. "So don't tell me that I could have done better, 'cos I'd like to see you try it, mister," she finished, pointing a finger at him and poking him in the chest. He'd not told her, and never would, but he admired the fire in her. She was feisty and strong, and other different circumstances, completely his type. _Bet she'd make a smashing vamp..._ he thought, his eyes absently going to her neck.

He snapped out of it when he realised her rant had run out of steam. "Okay, fine. 'M not happy about it, mind, but 'll have to put up with it now," he sighed again and folded his arms as he leaned back against the wall. He cast a glance at Xander to see him trying and badly failing to hide a grin.

"Least I don' look like a dead gay jock," he fired at the young man, shutting him up instantly.

"No, you're just dead," Xander retorted weakly. "And broody," he tried again a few moments later. Finally, he tried one last time to insult the other man. "And look like you use way too much hair gel." By the look on Spike's face, he hadn't succeeded.

* * *

They stayed in the club for a little while longer before deciding that it was probably safe to leave. It seemed that luck was on their side, as they had no trouble as the two men walked Willow back to her dorm, where she allowed her glamour to drop in the empty bathroom. Not long later, she got a call from Xander saying they'd made it okay, and that Spike was sure they hadn't been followed, giving her the go ahead to drop their disguises too.

Exhausted from the nights events, Willow flopped down onto her bed after changing her clothes and climbed under the covers. Her last thought before she drifted into an uneasy sleep was that her friend was okay and would be back when she woke up.

* * *

A/N: Okay, so it's late, I've been working on this chapter for so long now, my brain hurts lol. So even though I've proof read it over and over, this may not be my best work ever and it's likely that there are many mistakes. If there are, and if it's not too much trouble, just let me know in a review and I'll edit and repost =) For that, I'll apologise again, just in case.

I thought it kinda poetic that Willow made Xander look like the guy who first came out to him and making me wonder a little about Xander's own sexuality lol. And Spike as Angel, the idea just made me laugh. At least, in my head it did, but perhaps I'm just strange like that XD

Also, I know that 'Protego' is actually a spell used in Harry Potter, and I think I remember it being used in order to reflect a spell back around on the caster. So whilst ( probably ) not used in the Buffyverse, I thought it was appropriate =)

Other than that, I really don't think there's anything else to say, so I'm gonna go to bed lol. Hopefully this longer chapter made up for the badness that was me not updating =)

Thanks for reading and please review!


	14. Plans and Surprises

A/N: Wow, have I been slacking lately. I'm sorry, I know as a reader that it can be hard to keep an interest in a story when it's not updated for a while, but thanks to everyone for bearing with me =)

I hope I've finally managed to get through this writer's block, and that I can update more often than months at a time. Unfortunately, I can't say when the next post will be, cos I'm in Uni at the moment and they've decided that piling on the work is a good idea lol. How woulda thought Uni was hard work? xD

But yes, rest assured that I am currently writing the next chapter and aim to get it up within the next week or so.

Also, I noticed that I managed to forget about thanking my reviewers at the beginning of the last chapter, so I apologise and send my thanks to soulcop83, missgwen33, Doni, Blade Redwind, Seapea, Sailor Sayuri, Niori, Linwe Ferland, kissdoogie, Figs, PWL and mat528 for their great reviews. It was re-reading these that got me determined to get posting again =) So thanks very much, and here's your next dosage of Better to Have Loved and Lost.

* * *

Chapter 14 : Plans and Surprises

"Walk with me?" Riley asked, turning slightly to indicate the opposite direction to the one her friends had gone in.

Buffy smiled to hide her suspicion, and nodded as she fell into step beside him. "So, what did you wanna talk about?"

"I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for how things ended between us. I was rude and angry, but hearing that you were getting married was just a shock, you know? But I'm okay now. How are the wedding plans going, by the way?" Riley attempted to ask casually, and judging the look on Buffy's face, he'd succeeded. He acted as earnest as he could as he led her further away.

Buffy's mouth worked soundlessly for a moment. She'd forgotten that she'd told Riley she was getting married and still hadn't cleared the matter. It just hadn't ranked high on her list of priorities right then. "Actually, we broke up. Marriage is such a big step, and we just weren't ready," she said quietly, thinking quickly in case he asked anything more.

"But, wasn't that him back there?"

The blonde's eyes flew to him. "How... what?"

"The guy back there. Billy Idol wannabe. Xander called him 'Spike'," Riley responded honestly.

"Uh, yeah. We're still friends," she said, stumbling slightly over the last word. 'Friends' had never been enough to describe their relationship. Still, the answer seemed to satisfy Riley as he nodded and gave her a small smile.

"That's good to know," Riley replied, his hand slipping into his pocket to grip the item inside. In one quick motion, he brought it out and aimed for Buffy.

Taken off guard by his movement, Buffy only just managed to dodge his swing in time and giving her a look at what was in his hand. The small black device he held could only be a taser, blue sparks of electricity shooting between the active prongs.

* * *

"Alright, alright, I'm coming!" Giles called wearily down the stairs, the knocking continuing and getting louder by the second. He cinched his grey robe tighter around her and opened the door, bleary eyes squinting into the night.

"Ah, Ripper. It's good to see you," greeted his visitor cheerily.

The deep tones of the other Brit instantly had Giles fully awake. He grabbed the lapels of the man's coat and slammed him against the wall outside his door. "Ethan Rayne. What do you want?" He asked darkly.

"Is that any way to greet an old friend now?" He asked cheekily, his face paling when Giles drew back his arm. "No, no, no! Wait! Hang on! You-you can beat the crap out of me. Go ahead, I can't stop you," he paused as Giles cocked his fist and prepared to punch him. Stammering, he tried to get his attention and save himself. "Or-or you can listen to what I have to say. Find out what's going on!"

Giles faltered, staring at the eager gaze of the man he once knew so well, suspicion in every line of his body. Slowly, he lowered his arm. "What are you talking about?"

"Something bad is happening. Bad for both of us."

"Bad for you" he replied, pulling his fist back once more.

"No, no, no! Listen! You have to listen!" Ethan begged in a panic. He relaxed as Giles' arm returned to his side again. "You're going to need time to prepare."

Ethan breathed a sigh of relief as he was released, his confident demeanour back in place. He stepped around Giles and into the apartment. "How about inviting me in and having a chat over a nice glass of scotch then?"

"How about I invite you to leave town before I force you to?"

"Now, now, Ripper, I mean you no harm," Ethan replied, finding two glasses and filling them with alcohol.

Giles watched him closely for a moment before closing the front door and pointedly poured himself his own drink and sitting in the armchair. Ethan shrugged and picked up both glasses, downing one as he approached the sofa and placing the empty glass with the full one on the coffee table as he sat. Nursing his drink in his hands, Giles kept his eyes on his unwanted guest.

"So, how have you been? And how's that delightful girl, Buffy is it?"

Giles inclined his head slightly. "Splendid. Now how about we skip the pleasantries and get straight to why you're here."

"I'm just interested in how you've been, Ripper. Not very good by the looks of it. Unemployed and no Slayer around to help. Taking care of things herself, is she?"

"She's a very strong, independent and resourceful young woman and one of the best Slayers in history," the Watcher said proudly.

"So she doesn't need her Watcher any longer. Guess that means you're out of two jobs then, mate."

Giles glared at Ethan, drinking the scotch from his glass in one draught. "Perhaps, but I'm here if she ever needs my help," he replied, retrieving the bottle of scotch from the counter.

Ethan just grinned at him and finished his second drink, holding his glass out to him. "Now, isn't this more fun than kicking my ass?"

"No," Giles stated.

Ethan looked disparaged for a moment before shrugging, the grin returning. "Oh. It's more fun for me."

Giles sighed and sat down again, a fresh tumbler of amber liquid in his grasp. "Just tell me what you want to tell me," he said tiredly.

"Oh, so crass. We used to be friends, when did all that fall apart?"

"The same time you started to worship chaos."

"Ah, religious intolerance. Sad, there. I mean, just look at the Irish troubles." The steel in Giles' eyes unsettled him, warning him that he'd better say something or he'd be seeing the Ripper again. "Okay, okay. Something happening in the dark worlds. It's always been rumours out there but only one thing's coming through clear. That something's harming demons and it's not the Slayer. Know anything about it?"

Giles studied Ethan and sipped his drink. "What are they saying?"

"You know demons. It's all exaggeration and blank verse. 'Pain as bright as steel', things like that. They're scared. There's something called "314" that's got them scared most of all. The kind of scared that turns to angry. I know we're not particularly fond of each other..." Giles scoffed and chuckled. Ethan frowned but raised his voice slightly and continued. "...Rupert. But we are a couple of old mystics. This new outfit, it's blundering into new places it doesn't belong. It's throwing the worlds out of balance. And that's way beyond chaos, mate. We're headed quite literally for one hell of a fight."

* * *

Buffy kept her eyes warily on the taser, her body tensed in preparation for a fight. "Riley, you don't wanna do this," she tried, every nerve on edge as her muscles hummed in anticipation.

Suddenly, Buffy went rigid as pain shot through her. When the blast eventually let up, she collapsed, gasping for breath. She tried to roll onto her side and get up, but her body wasn't co-operating. Unable to move, she lay prone on her back and weak from the unexpected shock.

"Don't even think about yelling for your friends or we'll take them in too," Riley warned, watching her carefully. Her powers were unknown, and there was no way to tell how long she'd be down.

She was surprised when she felt her energy returning already, but she could see several agents approaching her, guns pointing directly at her. They approached her slowly, cautiously, wary of any movements she made.

Riley watched as her eyes darted between the soldiers, her mind clearly working overtime to figure a way out of her situation. Hard, cold eyes stayed fixed on the blonde.

"Take her," he commanded.

Her body convulsed with electricity, every nerve screaming at her in agony. Unable to fight or yell, Buffy finally gave into the darkness.

Riley looked up and nodded to the men around him. Scooping her up into their arms, they bound her wrists and ankles with plastic ties and carried her into the darkness.

"Let's find out what you are," he said to himself, following after his troop.

* * *

Ethan poured the last dribble of scotch from the bottle into his empty glass.

"You know what gets me?" Giles began drunkenly. "This is what gets me. Twenty years I've been fighting demons. Maggie Walsh and her Nancy-ninja boys come in and six months later, demons are pissing themselves with fear. They never even noticed me."

Ethan paused for a moment, glancing up at Giles. "Who's Maggie Walsh?"

"Oh, she's awful. Thinks that capturing demons and experimenting makes her the big man. I'm twice the man she is!" He slurred, taking a big gulp from his own glass and slamming it down on the table. "We gotta face it, we've changed. We'll not you . . . you're still sadistic and self-centered."

Ethan lifted his glass. "Here's to me," he toasted, taking a sip.

Giles continued, oblivious to his visitor. "The world has passed us by. Someone snuck in and left us a couple of has-beens in our place. This Initiative, I mean, their methods may be causing problems, but they're getting the job done. Where am I? I'm an unemployed librarian with a tendency to get knocked on the head," he complained, still bitter about his experience with the Vahrall demons earlier that evening.

"Well, we won't have to worry about that anymore now, mate," he began jokingly, before his tone became more serious. "When you went to the loo I slipped a small pellet of poison in your drink. You'll be dead in an hour."

Giles scoffed, then his face fell, the severity of the situation hitting him and sobering him up.

Ethan took a moment to watch the realisation kick in. Grinning like a maniac, he exclaimed, "Just kidding!" There was a pause, after which they both burst out laughing, the light mood restored.

"I'm gonna feel like hell in the morning," Giles stated, having calmed down again.

Waving a hand distractedly, Ethan dismissed his point. "Relax. Enjoy the night. We're just a couple of sorcerers. The night is still our time. Time of magic."

Both men raised their glasses, clinking them together in a toast.

"To magic."

* * *

Awareness came slowly back to the sleepy redhead, as she yawned and stretched. She made a small noise of protest against the sun streaming in through her windows that shone directly on her pillow. Willow screwed her eyes up before slowly opening them and scowling out the window. She sat up and stretched again, her muscles aching from her rest.

"Morning, Buffy," she said groggily, her voice thick and with drowsiness. She frowned when she got no reply and looked to her left. Confusion wrinkled her brow further as she stared at her friend's unmade bed. In a wave, the memories from the night before swept over her and she jumped to her feet, her entire being fully alert. Grabbing the phone, she dialled as fast as she could.

"'Lo?" A tired voice answered.

"Xander, put Spike on the phone," she demanded, her voice quiet but firm. In his basement, Xander handed the phone to the vampire, roused by the sound of the ringing phone, without hesitation and rubbed his eyes in an effort to wake up.

"What's the matter, Red?" Spike asked, fearing he already knew the answer.

"You might wanna change that 'if' to 'when'. When something happens," she replied quickly.

"Slow down, pet, what's happened?"

"Buffy didn't come back last night."

There was a pause as blue eyes caught brown. "We'll be right there," he answered shortly, hanging up immediately.

Willow replaced the receiver and sat on her bed, the feeling of fear for her friend rapidly filling her as she waited anxiously for the help that was on its way.

* * *

Pain. Cold, hard floor. Blinding lights. Her senses returned to her one by one as she woke. Disorientated and confused, Buffy shook her head and slowly lifted herself into a sitting position. Her hand went to her head as she glanced about.

"What? Where...?" Her voice was a mere whisper but it echoed back to her from the stark walls of her cell. The sound scratched her dry throat and she coughed to clear it, trying to remember what had happened to her.

The school. A fight. Riley and the commandos. Pain and then darkness. She closed her eyes tightly against the images that assaulted her, snapping open again when she came to a realisation. _This must be the Initiative's containment cells._

Standing on shaking legs, she moved towards the front wall that was made entirely of glass. Across from her she could see another cell identical to her own, holding a large demon with antlers that was pacing from one side to the other. Either side of him was another cell, also identical. Buffy leant closer to the glass, turning her head and leaning on it to see further down the hall.

Pain flooded her hands, spreading up her arms and into her body as she was flung back from the door. She stumbled, landing heavily on her coccyx and she gasped in pain, heat warming her cheeks to colour them slightly whilst she rubbed the affected area.

"Okay, ouch. Guess I won't be doing that again anytime soon," she grumbled, standing again.

"No, you really shouldn't. But then, we can't be sure of how intelligent you are," a voice mocked, the owner walking into view and standing just outside the door of her cell.

Buffy glared at the woman, wanting to knock the smug smile of her Professor's face. "Walsh," she greeted impassively, even as her stature became subtly defensive.

Walsh just chuckled and glanced down at the clipboard she clutched in her hands before looking back up at the caged Slayer. "You, my dear, are quite fascinating. You appear human, act human, and for all intents and purposes, are human. But you're not, are you?"

"Of course I'm human, and you'd better release me right now," she retorted, her voice beginning to burn with emotion.

The older woman just smiled cynically. "Now, we both know that not true, and that that's not going to happen. You're a demon, with the looks of a human but incredible speed and strength that could be nothing but supernatural. What I'm yet to figure out though, is what kind of demon you are. You're very unique, Miss Summers, and we've never come across anything quite like you."

"I am not a demon," Buffy bit out from between clenched teeth.

"I beg to differ. As I said, you've been observed performing extreme feats of both strength and speed, and have been seen on numerous occasions to be collaborating with other demons," Walsh paused for a moment, staring at Buffy with calculating eyes. Seeming to make a decision, she shifted her weight and lowered her clipboard. "I believe you know one of our hostiles. He escaped from here quite recently and has been difficult to retrieve. I think you call him... 'Spike'?" She paused before his name, making eye contact with the blonde as she did.

Buffy's stare became harder as she folded her arms across her chest, remaining silent. "Ah, I see you are familiar with him. Perhaps we'll have ourselves a little talk about him later. For now, there are some other questions I want to ask you."

As the last word left her mouth, white smoke began to fill the room from a hole in the ceiling. Buffy's arms dropped to her sides, her head lifting to look at the point where the unknown gas was being pumped into her cell. Slowly, she backed away to the back of the small box she was confined to.

"You won't get away with this," she said simply, her gaze returning to the professor, who watched unflinchingly as the young woman crouched down in an attempt to escape the smoke. After a few minutes, the smoke had completely obscured her view into the cell. She waited a moment longer to ensure her captive was incapacitated then motioned to the three soldiers standing at the end of the corridor. They approached her quickly, pulling on gas masks and pushing a hospital bed, as she slid her card into the box next to the cell door and punched in her pin.

The door opened almost silently, the sound of the glass slide into the wall practically inaudible in the large facility. Moving rapidly and efficiently, the soldiers entered the room and picked up the unconscious form. With sharp, professional movements, Buffy was soon strapped tightly to the metal bed. Without a word, Walsh walked away from the cell, the door sliding closed again. No orders were necessary as the soldiers followed her, the four of them ignoring the angry cries of their other prisoners.

* * *

Large, muscled arms stretched above the covers, one moving to switch off the shrieking alarm next to the bed. A load groan of protest rang throughout the small apartment as the occupant slowly roused himself from sleep.

"Bloody hell, knew I'd feel like hell in the morning," he grumbled to himself under his breath.

Another huge yawn and he threw the covers back, his eyes screwed shut in a futile attempt to block out the light that poured in through his window and the headache that pounded against his skull. A load groan and Giles heaved himself up out of his bed, scratching his stomach and stumbling towards the stairs. He allowed his weight to carry him down each step, slow and ungraceful in his half awake state. He raised his hands and rubbed his eyes, running them over his head to flatten his hair which was no doubt sticking up in all directions.

He froze when his hand encountered something he didn't expect. Instead of his messy hair, he felt something hard that seemed to grow out of the top of his head. Using his sense of touch, he felt the other side to find a matching protrusion, and followed them with his hands. His eyes snapped fully open, catching sight of his reflection in his mirror at the bottom of the mirror.

A bulky red demon stood where he should have been, staring in wide eyed horror. He raised his hand and touched one of the hairy ears that had apparently replaced his own. He let out an unmanly yelp when it moved, his mouth moving silently as he tried to take in his new look. Incoherent noises came from his mouth as he struggled to make a complete sentence. He reached out to the banister to support himself in his shock, only for it to break of in his hand.

Giles stared at the piece of wood in his hand and groaned. Dropping it, he moved closer to the mirror, trying to remember what happened.

_Scotch, I remember lots of scotch. Bloody hell, what happened last night? Drinks, my inability to aid Buffy... _Suddenly it clicked. "Ethan Rayne," he growled.

He stomped down the rest of the stairs and grabbed a shirt from the back of the sofa, attempting to pull it over his now rather broader back. It tore down the centre and Giles made a sound of protest. "I liked that shirt," he complained, throwing it onto the back of the chair and glancing around for something else. He spotted a hideous blanket, and after a moment of deliberation he decided it couldn't be more unsightly than himself right know, given his appearance and the unsuspecting population of Sunnydale. He needed help to figure this out, and there was only one place he knew he could safely get to.

He pulled open his door, cringing as he managed to yank it literally off its hinges. Placing it as gently as he could against the wall, he left his small apartment in search of the assistance he needed. Plan in mind, he headed out, never hearing the shrill ringing of the phone behind him as he walked away.

* * *

"This isn't right, guys. We have no idea what they're doing to her," Willow said helplessly as she paced the room.

"I've got a pretty good idea," Spike replied solemnly, his blue eyes darkened with seriousness and the weight of his own experience at the Initiative's hands.

"Then you know we've gotta help her," she pleaded with the vampire, coming to a stop just in front of him.

"I know, luv, but we can' jus' go chargin' in there. We need a plan," he said, lowering his arms from their crossed position, his voice uncharacteristically soft.

"Yeah, 'cos you're the master of plans," Xander mocked from his place on Willow's bed.

Spike scoffed. "Tha's righ', and you're jus' the brainiest one of the bunch. The high school dropout who can' keep a job for more than a week."

Xander shot to his feet, a finger pointing at the vampire across the room. "Hey, I'll have you know that I've been employed for three weeks now," he stated indignantly. He dropped his arm, his bluster fading. "Besides, I just like to keep my options open." The blond just looked at him, unimpressed, before Willow caught their attention again.

"Okay, this isn't helping Buffy. Spike, you're the only one who's seen inside the lab before. Do you think you could get us in?"

He frowned for a moment, conflicted by his sudden need to rescue the Slayer with the fear of the white, sterile labs of the Initiative. Sighing, he did what he always did and went with his instinct. "Yeah, I migh'," he said in resignation.

"Why are you so keen on helping us anyway, Dead Boy Jr.?" Xander asked sceptically.

"I dunno, alrigh'!" Spike exclaimed, taking a moment to calm himself down and collect his thoughts again. "I jus'... I was down there. They experimented on me, cut me up, and took away the very thing that comes natural to me. I may be evil, but I'm a vampire. Can' eat, can' defend m'self. They took away my only way to survive. I wouldn' even die, jus' get weaker an' weaker an' weaker til I couldn' even move," he paused, lifting his gaze from where it had dropped to the floor to focus on the two teenagers. "'M dead already, I know. So trust me when I say there are worse things than death. I wouldn' wish what they do down there on the Slayer, she's better than tha'," he stopped for a moment, and saw the surprised looks on their faces. The more curious one on Willow's that looked like she'd figured something out made him backtrack a bit. The slightly excited look in her eyes unnerved him. "And if anyone gets to finish off the Slayer, it's gonna be me," he finished flippantly. There was a moment of silence where no one seemed to know quite what to say.

"We should call Giles," Willow finally offered, heading towards the phone. The room almost visibly breathed a sigh of relief as the atmosphere relaxed slightly. The two men watched quietly whilst Willow made the call. After a minute, her forehead creased into a frown. "That's weird. No answer."

"Well why don't we get to plan making and go see the G-Man later to fill him in?" Xander proposed.

Willow nodded and sat down on Buffy's bed, opposite Xander, whilst Spike leant against her friend's desk. Together, they began to brainstorm a way to break into the facility that had captured the formidable fighter they all knew.

* * *

"Ah, she's awake," Walsh muttered as the girl strapped to the bed began to stir.

Buffy groaned as she opened her eyes, her vision swimming before her. Everything sounded like it was underwater and her thoughts were muddled and sluggish. Forming a coherent thought took so much energy and would dissipate almost as soon as it formed, the drugs in the smoke still lingering in her system.

"And sooner than expected. Maybe your healing ability is something that should also be measured. Now, I'm going to ask you a few questions, and you're going to answer. Let's start with the eay ones shall we? What are you?"

Buffy lifted her head a little, closing her eyes in pain and lowering it again carefully. "What have you... done to me?" She asked weakly.

"You've been administered an extreme muscle relaxant. Now, believe me when I say it's in your best interests to co-operate with me. What are you?"

"Capricorn, on the cusp of Aquarius. You?" She quipped, feeling steadily stronger the longer she was awake.

"Very funny, Miss Summers. Let me rephrase. What kind of demon are you?"

"I already told you. I'm not a demon. It's not my fault if you're just not getting it."

Walsh's temper rose at the tone the girl was using, but didn't allow it to show. "Well, if you're not a demon, what are you?"

"Human," Buffy answered simply.

"It's quite obvious you're not. Extraordinary powers that no person should have, and at least a basic knowledge of the supernatural. For the last time, what are you?"

"I'm human," the blonde repeated angrily.

Walsh nodded to a soldier to Buffy's right. He pulled out a small device and jabbed her upper arm. Jolts of electricity ripped through her for a few seconds, leaving her gasping. "I told you it would be in your best interests to co-operate with me. There will be consequences for disobedience."

"I'm not a dog either," she retorted. She was rewarded with another jolt, longer this time and drawing a scream to her throat. Buffy bit her lip to prevent voicing it, not wanting to give the scientist the satisfaction. "I told you, human," she said breathlessly. Another surge of electricity flowed through her entire body. Buffy groaned aloud, fighting the black spots in her peripheral vision.

"I can do this all day, Miss Summers. So please, start talking."

* * *

Giles lightly pushed the door to Xander's basement open, trying not to further break anything with his unknown strength. He entered cautiously, not wanting to startle the young man and unsure if Spike would still be living there. The sight of an empty, unmade bed with the sheets twisted, along with the ropes lying to the side of the luminous chair and no sight of either the brunette or the vampire worried Giles greatly. Had Spike managed to release himself and taken Xander? He growled low in his throat, the sound vibrating in his chest and growing in volume.

"Hey, who's down there?" Shouted an angry voice from above him.

The sound ceased abruptly as Giles turned frightened eyes to the ceiling. He couldn't be caught down here. He couldn't be seen by one of the blind people of this town on top of a Hellmouth. He fled the basement, out across the yard and towards the path. In his rush, he tripped over some toys left on the grass next door, sending him sprawling across the garden and uncovered by the blanket. A woman started yelling, pulling her children away from him and calling for someone to call the police.

"Bloody humans!" Giles grumbled as he pulled himself to his feet. He grabbed his blanket, pulling it over his head again and running off into the distance.

* * *

"Righ', well we're gonna need to some more mojo if we're gonna pull this thing off."

"I can do this," Willow said sternly, her eyes fixed on the vampire.

"I heard what Buffy said jus' as well as you did. Better, I'd wager. You gotta be careful how far into the magicks you get, Red. Magic always has consequences. I'm not sayin' you can' do it, but maybe you should see if you can get help."

"From where? Do we really wanna get other people involved in this?" Xander asked.

Willow had fallen silent for a moment though. _A blonde girl stood in her doorway holding a spell book. _"That's... not a bad idea actually. I think I know someone who can help."

"How do we know we can trust them?" The brunette asked impatiently.

"Because I do," she answered simply.

Spike assessed her for a moment before nodding. "It's your call, pet. We go in tomorrow nigh'"

"Tomorrow?" The two teenagers exclaimed.

"Well, yeah," he retorted, as if it should be obvious to them. He sighed when he saw they were going to protest. "Look, there's less chance of us bein' caugh' at nigh' cos of the soldier boys out patrollin'. We can' go tonigh' cos Red here needs to get help, and you gotta explain this all to them and practice. Remember, we get one shot. Tha's it." Xander glared at the blond but remained silent and Willow, though reluctantly, conceded his point. "So, tomorrow nigh'. Then 'm goin' back into that Hellhole."

Silence fell over the unlikely trio, their plans ready to set into motion.

* * *

"Professor Walsh, there's a situation," a soldier reported emotionlessly once he had been allowed into the room. He kept his eyes forward and tried not to look at the restrained and helpless looking young girl. He was new to this job and he had to learn that appearances could be deceiving. He trusted that Walsh knew what she was doing. If she was doing this to the girl, then she deserved it.

Walsh herself glanced at Buffy, the blonde fading in and out of consciousness due to the numerous shocks and various other treatments she had been subjected to. Still, the stubborn girl had refused to give her any information, repeating only that she was human.

"Well, perhaps a break will be beneficial to Miss Summers. Maybe then she'll be more co-operative. Thank you, Agent."

The soldier nodded, letting his eyes drift to the captive. His eyes widened ever so slightly at the sight of her. Her forearms were covered in small surgical cuts, her face was pale and her eyes kept flickering shut as she struggled to stay awake. And yet she was still glowed. Slowly, her she fought long enough to open her eyes fully, her deep green orbs locking on his.

"I'm human," she whispered, only just loud enough for the occupants of the room to hear. Her lids finally fell shut as she gave into the exhaustion that was overwhelming her.

Walsh rolled her eyes at Buffy's unhelpful statement. "Lead the way, Agent. You can give me the details on the way," she ordered.

Conflicted, the soldier used his training to squash down his emotions and straightened up. "Yes, Ma'am."

He turned and left the room at a brisk walk, the professor following after him, the sight of the beautiful and bound blonde burned into his mind.

* * *

Images of the demon stomping around, scaring civilians, was playing on several screens as Walsh watched impassively. The soldier briefly wondered if she ever showed any emotion but kept his opinions to himself.

"Send out a retrieval team. Let's bring him in, boys."

"Finn's team, Ma'am?"

"Is Finn's team the best retrieval team we have?"

Confused, the soldier just answered. "Yes, Ma'am."

"Are they out on another mission?"

"No, Ma'am."

"Then I think that it would be obvious that Agent Finn's team is the one I'd want sent out, correct?"

Irritation and anger swirled in the soldier's chest. He knew that making assumptions based on his own thoughts and views could end his career before he could blink. He gritted his teeth and kept his voice flat and monotone. "Yes, Ma'am."

"Well go on then." Walsh dismissed, giving him an insincere, patronising smile.

He nodded and turned on his heels to tell Riley about his next mission. Remembering the girl's final words before he left, and the things he'd seen since being here as well as the treatment he was receiving as a soldier, he wondered what he was doing there. _We're doing good here, that's why. Right?_

* * *

I found when I was writing this that there were a few holes in the way I was writing the plot. For example, now Buffy's not with Riley and has shared her secret with Giles, he wasn't feeling so left out and wouldn't go to the bar, and there wouldn't be a surprise party etc. So I've had to play around with the timeline a bit, which is one of the reasons I've had a bit of trouble getting this chapter done and posted. Also, now Riley's not in the Scooby circle, I had to compensate for them needing a man on the inside...

So I'm currently working on Chapter 15 =) I hope you enjoyed reading this, and as usual, please review. It makes my day =)

P.S. Yoshino in the Moonlight sent me a message about discussing fanwork in general, such as fiction on other sites, and fanart created by fans of shows. We also talked about how it could be fun for people to be able to arrange meetings between other fans of fanfic and such in local areas. I offered to add the idea to the bottom of my next chapter, as well as a link to their site. So, for topics like this, Yoshino has a site that people can discuss different things on, which can be found at:

www(dot)fanbbs(dot)net

Thanks again readers! Til next time, Jay


	15. Fyarls, Witches and Poison

A/N: Wow, I had no idea it had been so long since I'd updated. Time has flown past! Thank you so much to everyone that's stuck by this fic, I know you've had to wait a long time. Hopefully putting up with my poor posting skills will be worth it though =)

Unfortunately, I've had half this chapter on my computer for months but not been sure how to finish it. I had an idea for the Initiative, but then wondered if it was too mean. I decided to put it in anyway, cos they are technically the Big Bad at the moment after all ( and I never liked them lol ). But then my muse deserted me and I got major writer's block. Not to mention the serious stress of uni life. Between working ( and partying xD ) and general real life, I just had to put this on hold for a bit. Hopefully I'll have more time to write now and be able to get the next one up with less of a wait. I know how it can be when an author doesn't update for a while, you get bored or you forget the story and don't bother trying to catch up again. Been there, done that. But I really do hope you've decided to revisit my fic =)

For their loyalty, my thanks go out to all my readers, and also to my reviewers: Spuffy IS true luv, BSC99, soulcop83, missgwen33, Niori and kissdoogie.

Thanks again everyone! And just to reassure you, chapter 16 is already in the works and being written as this is posting and I hope to have it up in the next 2 weeks =)

So, without further ado, here's the next chapter:

( Oh, and the italics are flashbacks =) )

* * *

Chapter 15 : Fyarls, Witches and Poison

Spike rushed through the front door of the Watcher's house, dropping the blanket from his shoulder and stomping out the flames that had begun to burn the ragged cloth. Xander followed after, anxiety clouding his expression when he saw the broken door resting against the wall.

"Giles?" He called, moving further into the building. "You here?"

Spike stopped slamming his boots down on the abused and smouldering cover, his back stiffening. Slowly, he raised his head and sniffed slightly, testing the air. He concentrated on the faint tingle of his skin, the odd scent in the air, Xander's voice fading away as he continued to yell.

The blond tilted his head to the side as his gaze travelled up towards the stairs, the broken banister catching his attention. He approached it, confusion rising within him as he tried to piece everything together. He could still smell Giles, so he must have been there in the past twenty four hours, but he could also smell the distinct odour of a Fyarl demon, which was much stronger and more recent. That, mixed with the scent of a male human he didn't recognise, and the tingle of magic in the air, was adding up to a jumble of facts that he couldn't connect. And whilst he could sense all that, he could tell that despite the minor damage on the staircase and the front door having been removed from its hinges, there was no sign of a struggle. Nothing. No tables over turned, no smashed ornaments, no broken valuables and no blood.

"Rupert's not here, Whelp, so stop yellin'," Spike said, his patience with the boy quickly running low.

"This isn't good. This so isn't good. Words cannot express how not good this is."

Spike rolled his eyes. "Thanks for clearing that one up, mate."

"We gotta find him. Some demon's probably after him. And God, we need Buffy," Xander babbled, his fear for his friends threatening to overwhelm him.

"Hey, calm down, yeah? We dunno wha' happened. Watcher's probably fine," the vampire reassured him, not sure why he was doing so. The small frown on his face belied his confusion, but Xander saw it as a tell.

"You're lying. You know what happened to him. I swear to God, Spike, if you had anything to do with this..." Xander approached Spike angrily, pointing a finger in his face.

"When?" Spike shouted, startling the brunette and deflating his righteous anger. The rage on Spike's face increased, his fiery blue eyes burning into the chocolate brown ones opposite him, disbelieving that he'd jump to that sort of conclusion immediately. "When would I have arranged this master evil plan? Between being tied up in your soddin' basement an' helpin' out the Slayer? Bloody hell, I've spent the past week practically under your bleedin' thumb!"

"Right. I know. Just, ah, covering all bases," Xander covered, holding his hands up in surrender and giggling nervously.

Spike stepped back and growled lowly, folding his arms across his chest. _Sometimes they seem to forget who they're messin' with. I'm a Master vampire, I'm not takin' this bloody crap._ _Chip won' hold me back forever._

"So, uh, any clues about what did happen?" Xander asked cautiously, watching the blond for any sign of movement.

Spike lifted his head to stare at the young man. Xander shifted under his calculating gaze, wondering what he was searching for. He must have found it however, as he started speaking.

Spike wondered if Xander was being sincere in asking him for help, his subtle version of an olive branch. When he saw no threat in his eyes or posture, he relaxed minutely, seeing instead only the intense desire to help his friends.

"Someone's cast a spell. Last twelve hours or so. Dunno wha' it did or who it was done to, but it's there," he stated, his voice still hard. He sighed when he saw Xander's look of worry and softened slightly. "There was a Fyarl demon 'ere not long ago, and Giles has been 'ere within the last twenty four hours. Not much else I can tell you 'cept there wasn' a struggle."

"But doesn't that mean that Giles could be... I mean, he could be..." Xander trailed off, unable to finish his thought.

Spike shook his head. "No blood, no death. And think about it, would Ripper really go down withou' a figh'?" He asked with a wry grin.

Xander hesitantly returned it and nodded. Giles had more fight in him than most people seemed to realise. Even if he did have a habit of being constantly knocked unconscious.

"We just gotta find him then. Do you think the demon kidnapped him?"

Spike frowned for a moment, looking at the door and banister again. He shook his head. "Look, the door was pulled off from the inside, not from being kicked in by somethin'."

"How can you tell?"

"The way the hinges are ben' an' the wood's splin'ered. Besides, wha' demon do you know that would break in or ou' an' balance the door against the wall?" Spike asked with a hint of amusement. "Nah, somethin' doesn' add up."

"Could you track the demon?"

Spike nodded absently. "Yeah, but if you wan' my help we're gonna have to wait. Can' track it above ground while the sun's up," he answered distractedly.

Xander was still watching him carefully, but more with curiosity now. He could see he was thinking about something. "Wanna, ah, share what's on your mind?"

"Hmm? Oh," Spike snapped back to the present and turned to Xander. "Jus' thinkin' about our friends at the Initiative."

"Buffy's our friend, not yours, okay? I don't know why you're helping, but I'm sure there's some other reason for it," Xander stated, his anger beginning to return.

Spike took a deep breath to control his temper and took a moment to fight down the demon within that wanted to rip the boy's throat out. "I was being sarcastic," he growled. "And I meant Giles, you stupid git," he bit through clenched teeth.

"Oh." Xander backed off again, not wondering why his own temper seemed so short when around the bleached vampire. "Oooh," he repeated in realisation. Then he frowned. "Wait, not 'oh'. What do you mean?"

A sigh preceded the answer. "If the Initiative gets the Fyarl before we can get to it, how're we gonna find Giles?" He asked in response, speaking slowly, as if to a child.

Comprehension dawned on Xander and his eyes grew wider. "Well we gotta find it first then."

"Congratulations, you're today's winner," Spike replied sarcastically. "We can' go til the sun's down."

"We can't wait that long!" Xander began to pace impatiently, but stopped when he caught Spike's eye.

"If you wanna go out an' look for it yourself, be my guest. But if you wan' my help, 'm not leavin' til dusk."

"Fine," Xander relented. "What are we meant to do til then?"

"You can pray an' hope an' what not if you want," he shrugged, moving towards the sofa.

"What are you gonna do?" The brunette asked, watching as Spike made himself comfortable and grabbed the remote.

"Passions is on. So shut your gob, I need to know what happened to Timmy," Spike glared at him menacingly, and Xander mimed zipping his lips shut before taking a seat. C_hance would be a fine thing_ thought Spike, turning his attention to the TV.

Xander shook his head. He'd never understand Spike. He glanced up to the television to see a woman talking to a male doll. _Maybe it's cos she reminds him so much of his precious Drusilla_ he thought spitefully. Curiosity overtook him though as he watched the characters on the screen.

"So who's that?"

Spike growled in irritation before explaining what had happened as fast as he could, his eyes glued to the television, determined not to miss any of the action.

* * *

She'd never felt so tired in her entire life. Every single muscle ached and burned from the stress she'd been under, exhaustion filling her whole body. She lay as still as she could, the slow, slight expansion of her chest as it rose and fell with her breath her only movement.

_

* * *

Buffy hadn't managed to convince the professor that she was human, so instead Walsh decided to place her in a cell with a large demon she'd never seen before and left her completely unarmed. It had been a tough fight, but after several minutes of only being able to avoid blows she managed to land some of her own. As bruised and battered as she was, her usually golden skin covered in cuts and coloured black and blue, she stood proud, the demon's head twisted to an unnatural angle. She panted for breath and stared defiantly at the older woman on the other side of the glass, wishing silently that she could wipe the smug smile from her face._

_"Are you going to continue claiming you're human, or are you ready to tell the truth?" The harridan asked her, her pompous attitude grinding at Buffy's nerves._

_For a moment, just a moment, Buffy thought about giving in. About telling these amateurs about the existence of Slayers and how ineffective their grand establishment was. How they knew nothing about the supernatural. How she had been dealing with vampires, demons and apocalypses since before she had even turned sweet sixteen. But she held firm. "I am human, you're just too stupid to realise what's really going on here," she spat, her glare piercing through Walsh and making her shiver._

_Walsh coughed and adjusted her clipboard in her arms to cover her sudden nervousness under the young blonde's scrutinising stare. The power this petite girl had was astounding, and it hadn't been until just then that she'd seen the authority, the strength and the experience that she had with it. Her presence filled the room, her anger almost a physical being as her power emanated from every pore of her broken skin. But it wasn't malicious. It was light, blinding light that seemed to give Buffy an ethereal glow as she appeared every inch a warrior for the side of good. And for a moment, just a moment, Maggie Walsh stood in awe and wondered just what she was doing. If she should let Buffy go, whatever she was. But she held firm._

_Her own gaze turned hard and cold. "It's well documented that demons have a lower intelligence than humans. You're no more than an animal. Believe me when I say that it's not me that's stupid."_

_Buffy stalked towards the glass door separating her from her captor, a predatory gleam in her eye. "Whatever helps you sleep at night," she said quietly, standing as close as she could without touching the electrical barrier. She stared at Walsh a moment longer before giving her a smirk Spike would have been proud of. "You really have no idea what goes bump in the night," she continued. Her voice softened a little, but her eyes rivalled Walsh's with the steel that lay beneath the sparkling green. "But trust me when I say you're gonna find out if you don't let me go."_

_"And why's that?" Walsh asked, determined not to let this slip of a girl unnerve her any more than she already had._

_"Slayer!" The single word rumbled loudly through the room. A vampire being dragged down the corridor by three soldiers was glaring at her with gleaming yellow eyes, snarling around his fangs. "Slayer, you won't get away with this! I'll get out of here you know!" He shouted._

_"Hey, didn't you realise I'm on the wrong side of the glass to be the one behind this?" She yelled back indignantly._

_The vampire blinked for a moment, clearly stumped. With his confusion, his demon mask faded to be replaced by his human face. Before he could reply, one of the soldiers blasted him with a taser and they carried on down the corridor._ Well, guess that didn't help the 'demons are just as intelligent as humans' argument I had going _she thought wryly._

_Walsh stood stunned. Slowly, she turned back to look at Buffy, excitement and curiosity written all over her face. "The Slayer? I thought you were a myth."_

_Buffy sighed internally._ Guess the gig is up._ "Well, you were myth-taken," she quipped, her eyes not yielding at all, despite her chirpy tone._

_"That explains so much! The human appearance but supernatural abilities, fighting against demons," she rambled happily. Then she paused, remembering something Agent Finn had told her that still didn't make sense. "Yet that doesn't explain other things. Now we've discovered exactly what you are, how about we have a conversation about your friend Spike?" The glint in the professor's eyes told Buffy all she needed to know about the expected method of talking and wondered if she had been wrong, and humans could be evil too._

_

* * *

_The session following had taken everything out of Buffy, leading her to her prone position now, back in the sterile white cell she had first awoken in. Their favourite techniques appeared to be the knives and electricity they had used before, only she was in a worse state now than she had been after the first experience with Walsh. Her stomach and arms were slashed with various cuts, each one noted down so they could monitor her healing abilities. Electricity had been used for punishment. But the one that had shocked her the most was the different method they'd introduced.

A small pinprick on the inside of her left elbow was all the evidence that was left of what they'd done to her.

_

* * *

Buffy gasped for breath after the last blast of electricity, the most powerful one that had been administered to her so far. She'd only suggested that perhaps they didn't to actually get a life rather than live underground torturing innocent people. It wasn't her fault they obviously led boring lives and had nothing better to do._

_"You seem to have a remarkable rate of healing. Tell me, is your immune system as strong?" Walsh asked, her clinically cold but curious gaze travelling over Buffy's body, making the blonde uncomfortable._

_"If you mean 'Do I get sick?' then no, not often," she bit back._

_Walsh just smiled at her, like it was the answer she'd been hoping for. Silently, she turned around and picked up a large hypodermic needle. She tapped the side and squirted a small amount into some tissue to get rid of the air bubbles, throwing the tissue in the bin. Buffy eyed the syringe warily as the professor approached her._

_"This is twenty milligrams of tetrodotoxin, the poison found in several different species of the tetraodontidae family," Walsh explained. At Buffy's blank look, other than the spark of panic at the word poison, she smiled condescendingly and continued. "The most common species is one known as the puffer fish. In small quantities, it can cause numbness of the tongue and lips, dizziness and vomiting. In larger doses, like the one I hold in my hand, causes paralysis, which spreads to the diaphragm, causing the victim to be unable to breath and resulting in death. Some people are lucky, and can survive until the poison wears off. Others are less fortunate. I believe that one person died within just seventeen minutes of ingestion, just because the fish wasn't cooked properly." She paused for dramatic effect, watching Buffy's eyes widen as they fixed on the syringe, fear entering her green gaze for the first time since she'd been captured. "Did you know that their poison is one hundred times more poisonous than potassium cyanide?" She added in a falsely happy tone._

_"Twenty five milligrams is enough to kill a one hundred and seventy pound person. Now, I'm guessing that you're a little less than that, so I've reduced the amount. I don't want to kill you after all, you're much too interesting. However, I don't know the exact measurements, so I've had to take an educated guess. I don't know what effect this will have on you. Let's find out, shall we?"_

_Walsh stepped even closer, the needle poised to enter her skin. "Wait!" Buffy cried out in a panic. Walsh paused. "W-what do you wanna know?"_

_The older woman's creepy smile hadn't faded, and got bigger at Buffy's question. She became serious before asking hers. "Where is Hostile Seventeen?"_

_"Hostile who?" Buffy responded lightly, flinching slightly as the needle pierced her skin, her heart rate increasing._

_"Seventeen." Walsh repeated angrily, raising her voice. "Where is Spike?"_

_"I don't know who you're talking about," she replied defiantly._

_"Bleached blond, irritating and hard to break. He has a chip in his head stopping him from hurting humans."_

_"If he can't hurt humans, why do you want him back?"_

_"Because I'm not finished with him. He's the most interesting subject I've ever seen, other than you of course. Now, are you going to help me or not?"_

_Buffy glanced down at the needle, Walsh's thumb over the plunger, ready to inject her with whatever poison she'd said was in there that may well lead to her death. _I love you, Spike_. She raised her eyes to lock them with the hard unfeeling ones opposite. Staring straight into them, she gave her answer._

_"No."_

_Buffy winced as she saw the anger take over her old psychology professor's face, and she pushed the plunger, forcing the poison through the thin needle and into Buffy's blood stream. She removed the needle, her face set firm in a now expressionless mask. She placed it down before facing her captive again. "You may well have just twenty minutes to live. How do you feel about sharing now?"_

_Buffy closed her eyes briefly, pushing down the fear and panic that was threatening to take her over. "Hmm, let me think," she started sarcastically, her eyes opening again to lock fiercely with Walsh's. "If I didn't tell you anything to save my life, what makes you think I would now you've pretty much signed my death warrant?" She laughed humourlessly. "And you think I'm the stupid one? Any secrets I have, I'll take to the grave with me." She paused for a moment, watching Walsh for any reaction. "Let me give you one little piece of advice. If you want information, threats are all good. But actually doing something so they know the end is coming? You'll get nothing. You've got even less chance now of getting me to say something that you did before, espec – " Buffy stopped mid sentence as her words began to slur._

_Walsh grinned. "That'll be the poison, Miss Summers," she informed Buffy happily._

_Buffy just laughed again. How did the professor expect her to tell her anything if she couldn't talk? She really was denser that she'd first imagined._ God, her plans go about as well as Spike's _she thought in amusement._ She just doesn't think ahead to the consequences of what could happen.

_"You know, scientists have been looking for an antidote to the poison now circling in your veins for years. Perhaps the answer lies in your blood. Even if you don't survive, you will no doubt be infinitely helpful to me," Walsh stated, the smile never leaving her face as she spoke, before turning to open the door and signalling the soldier outside. "Take her back to her cell."_

_The soldier nodded and obediently lowered the bed Buffy had been strapped to from its vertical position so it was horizontal once more, and wheeled her out of the room. By the time they got back to where she was being held, Buffy's heart rate had increased even more, she'd become feverish and disorientated, and was no longer fighting them at all. They untied her and dragged her into the cell with no resistance from her. She lay where they left her, not moving a muscle as they sealed the door and walked away. Unable to move, and her mind in a muddle, her last conscious thought was that she hoped her Slayer healing powers could save her from this._

_Shaking, sweating, burning. God the burning. She felt like her skin was on fire, like she was slowly melting away from the inside out as she lay in the white cell of a mad scientist, convinced that these would be her last moments. And she was completely alone._

_

* * *

_As Buffy lay immobile dozen's of feet below the surface, Willow had found Tara and explained that she needed her help.

"Now, don't freak out okay?" Willow began nervously, wringing her hands as she sat on the bed, opposite the other witch. Tara nodded warily, wondering what on Earth Willow could possibly need her help with.

The red head returned the slow nod and thought about where to begin. Unfortunately, her nerves overcame her. "Vampires are real," she blurted, wide searching eyes fixed on the gentle ones staring back.

Tara startled slightly at the outburst, but smiled softly in return. "I-I-I know," she said quietly, ducking her head to avoid eye contact. She wished she had the courage to look up to see Willow's reaction to her knowledge of the supernatural.

Willow was stunned. "You know?" She asked dumbly.

Tara raised her head, hesitantly lifting her eyes. "Y-Yeah," her agreement sounding more like a question.

"But... How?"

"Well, magic is real. I-I-I know demons exist. And I mean, laryngitis?" A lopsided grin spread across her face, a slightly nervous giggle escaping her.

Willow relaxed and returned the grin. "Yeah, I guess you're right. It is kinda obvious when it gets shoved in your face like that, huh?"

"M-most people are completely oblivious, but, umm, I can see auras and stuff. Makes it kinda hard to pretend."

The two witches smiled at each other, the sparks flying between them as they gazed into each other's eyes obvious to anyone if they were there to see them together. Tara glanced away first, bringing her eyes back up with a smile. "S-s-so, you wanted my help with something?"

Willow gasped and knocked herself lightly in the side of the head with the palm of her hand. "Of course! Sorry," she smiled sheepishly before continuing. "Okay, so underneath us is a secret government base that experiment on demons. I, I mean, we, need your help because they've kidnapped our friend, Buffy."

"B-Buffy? What would they want with her if they experiment on demons?" Tara asked, a small frown creasing her brow.

"See, umm... Buffy's the Slayer. One girl in all the world, endowed with super strength so she can kill the demons and protect everyone. We help her. We're, we're... we're kinda like the Slayerettes!" She exclaimed proudly, a big grin on her face. "And well, they must have seen her fighting or something, and now they don't think she's human. Which she is! She just has Slayer strength and speed and stuff... I don't really know how that works," Willow frowned a little before her expression cleared and her tone lightened again. "But she is human. We think she may have been seen talking to Spike too."

Tara blinked, trying to grasp everything she'd been told. "But why would they t-take her for talking to this Spike guy?"

"Oh, yeah. Spike's kinda... a vampire. But he's not evil anymore," She rushed to reassure her new friend. "At least, I don't think so... He says he is, a-and he did try to kill me a few weeks ago, but he's good now." She paused. "I think."

"So, if Buffy's the Slayer, isn't it kinda her job to, you know, k-kill him?"

"Yeah, technically. But Spike's always been kinda... different? Terrifying, a-and scary, and bloodthirsty, but different. I mean, he was in love with Drusilla for over a century. That's devotion, right there. But he doesn't have a soul either, and Giles said you can't love without one. Except, he does." She shook her head. "Anyway, off track. She did try to kill him a couple of years ago, but then he helped her save the world, so she let him leave town. And now he's back, and they were trying to kill each other again, but then Spike got a chip in his head so he couldn't hurt humans. A-and Buffy's our leader. She's said he's safe, and I trust her judgement," she finished, her babble finally running out of steam.

Tara was silent for a moment, her eyes slightly unfocused and her expression thoughtful as she nodded. Her eyes turned back to Willow and the present after a few seconds. "So, you want m-me to help you?" Willow nodded enthusiastically. "How?"

"We have a plan to get her out, but I have to be careful about how much magic I use. Buffy had a dream, a kind of Slayer warning, I guess. She warned me that I'd be corrupted by the power if I let myself get too deep in it," she lowered her eyes to her lap, her clasped hands trembling slightly.

Her head lifted when a hand covered hers to see Tara leaning towards her with a gentle smile, her eyes soft and understanding. "Many witches are seduced by the power of dark magic. If you're taking the steps to make sure you're not one of them, then I'm proud of you."

Willow's eyes filled with awe at the quietly confident statement, free of stutters, and it gave her courage to voice the idea that had been at the back of her brain ever since Buffy had told her what she had to do. "She said I have to go to a coven in England over the summer, and that they'll teach me how to get more powerful, but also how to control it," she paused, assessing Tara's mood. Finally, she took a deep breath and just did it. "Tara, would you like to come with me?" Tara's mouth fell open in shock, causing Willow to quickly backtrack.

"I-I-I mean, you don't have to. I mean, why would want to? We barely know each other, it's ridiculous really!" She laughed, but it hurt her ears to hear how loud and fake it sounded. She quietened, her eyes still avoiding Tara's. "I just thought, I'm a witch, you're a witch, it's a witch-y camp. I thought you might, you know, maybe wanna go too," she mumbled, her voice losing volume as she continued. The answer that followed shocked her into speechlessness as she stared at the young woman she was starting to feel so close to.

Throwing caution to the wind, Tara gathered all of her courage. "Yes," she answered boldly, already wondering if she'd made a mistake. But she'd always wanted to go to England, and she'd finally found another magically inclined friend, as well as a place that could help her train her powers. And she'd get to spend the summer with the woman she already knew she saw as more than a friend. All her doubts vanished when shocked green eyes shot to hers. Willow's gaze reassured her, calmed her, and let her know she'd made the right decision.

* * *

A/N: And that's it for now. Thanks for reading, like I said I hope you found it worth waiting for =) I tried to make it a bit longer too to make up for it...

Also, I'm not sure if it's just in the editor that I can see this, or if I've done something wrong, or if it's a malfunction with but there are a few big gaps between some paragraphs that I can't seem to get rid of. If you can see them, my apologies.

So, not much else to say that I haven't said already. Thanks again, and please please review! It makes me happy to see your thoughts on my work =)

Jay


	16. Tracking a Demon

A/N: Thank you to all my readers, so so much! I don't remember the last time I got so many emails saying one of my stories had been favourited/alerted/reviewed. Safe to say I was a happy happy author xD

Ultra big thanks to missgwen33, Seapea, nabile, CSIDelko, Britany, Cityglitter and iamdk for their wonderful reviews!

One other note, before you can get to the chapter itself ( unless you skip the author notes lol ) is that I am also gonna be trying to update my other fic A New Life at some point in the near future. I have a lot of plans for that fic, I've just had a lot of problems meshing them together, which was why I started this one. I had a mini brain wave recently though, so chapter 15 for that one is finally done! I will be posting it by the end of this week, and hopefully I'll be able to start filling in those plot holes and finish that fic along side this one. With any luck I may be able to update alternately... Although plans like that have a tendancy to not really work out that way for me, but I will do my best =)

So, I won't make you wait any longer, and I present you with chapter 16!

* * *

Chapter 16 : Tracking a Demon

As the last of the golden rays dipped low behind the buildings of Sunnydale, Xander was out the door and storming in front. He'd tried to keep his cool around the calm and seemingly unconcerned vampire but it had led to his increasing worry for his friends. Nervous energy filled him and he had been left to pace the house and just had been captured by the Initiative, having only God knew what done to her whilst Giles had disappeared with only the scent of a Fyarl demon to possibly lead them to his whereabouts. It was times like this that Xander hated not having any powers. He was pulled out of his downward spiralling thoughts by the sound of his name.

"Where are you going, Harris?" Spike asked, his tone frustrated as he spun the young man around to face him. Xander had charged out before him and gone stalking ahead in completely the opposite direction to the Fyarl. It was only after calling after him three times with various nicknames that he had to resort to using his surname. He saw the brunette's eyes clear as he focused on him and felt a small amount of pity for the boy who cared so deeply about the people close to him and yet unable to help them for now. "C'mon, demon went this way," he said tilting his head to indicate behind him.

An uncharacteristically silent Xander nodded and moved round him to walk in that direction. Spike kept pace with him, walking next to him. After a moment of uncomfortable silence, Spike spoke up. "There's somethin' weird about this demon. Scent's not quite righ'."

Xander glanced at him but kept his gaze in front of him. "Weird how?"

"Dunno exactly, but it's got a kinda... human smell to it too," the blond replied with a frown.

"Like Giles human smell?"

"Too faint to tell, but 'm thinkin' we should move."

Puzzled, Xander said, "We are, we're walking."

"No, I mean run. There's a commando vehicle coming up the street." He was proud how there was a barely detectable tremor in his voice. His pride lessened at Xander's statement.

He had heard the waver in Spike's voice and knew that he was having to deal with something bad. "Through here," he said, his voice low and urgent as he pushed Spike towards a low gate to a children's park. They easily jumped the fence and darted between the slides and swings to the other side and disappearing into the woods opposite.

"I'm guessing it was bad, in the Initiative?" Xander asked hesitantly between breaths, afraid to broach the topic with Spike but wanting to know all the same, as well as wanting to brace himself for the conditions Buffy might have been subjected to.

"I've had worse," was his only reply.

"Angelus?" Xander asked quietly.

Spike's eyes darted to the other male, surprised by how perceptive he had been. All the torture Angelus had put upon him had been before Xander's time, or behind closed doors. "Yeah, Angelus," he agreed just as quietly. _And Dru. And myself _he thought. The emotional wounds he bore would always be more horrific and scar deeper than the physical wounds that had healed over time. "They're a close second though," he added, remembering the hole they had drilled in his skull, the bones they had broken and the fluid that had been pumped through dead veins so that the effects could be monitored and recorded.

"Will Buffy be okay?" Xander's voice shook slightly for fear of Spike's answer.

"Slayer's strong. She'll be okay," he stated flatly. _Eventually_ he finished silently.

They didn't speak again for a while as they jogged through the town. They only stopped when they reached the street again and Spike managed to pick up the trail. Beckoning Xander to follow him, he continued on his way. Panting, trying to catch his breath again, Xander stopped outside a house as Spike went on ahead a little.

He noticed and stopped, turning to wait for the human. _Definitely one of the perks of being a vampire_ they thought simultaneously as they observed each other. Spike was distracted by the diversion of the scent he was tracking though, as it appeared to enter one of the houses.

"Fyarl went in there," he reported, confusion entering his voice a little.

Xander looked up from his bent position at the house Spike had pointed to. Recognition finally clicked within his mind. "This is my house. Why would the demon come here?"

Spike shrugged. "Dunno, but it kept going, so we should too."

The young man nodded resignedly and took a few deeper breaths before the two of them set off again on the hunt for the demon that could help them find Giles.

* * *

She felt so weak. Every muscle in her body felt achingly tired, every tiny movement causing burning pain. Her eyes itched as she tried to open them, blinking repeatedly to clear her vision. Slowly, the same white walls she'd been staring at for almost as long as she could remember came into focus.

_Have I always been here? _She wondered, her mind confused and muddled. _No, there were others. Spike... Willow, Xander... Giles. I have to get out of here._ Her plan of escaping existed of no more than finding the energy to get up though. Moving slowly, she placed her hands flat on the floor on either side of her chest. Gradually, she inched herself upwards, gritting her teeth against the intense need to collapse. Dragging herself over to the wall, she leant against it so she was sat up and panted for breath. It had taken every ounce of effort within her to move as far as she had.

_This shouldn't be so hard, I'm Buffy the Vampire Slayer for crying out loud! God, what did that poison do to me?_ She hadn't ever felt this bad, not even when she had gotten sick two years ago.

The loud swish of the glass door opening caught her attention, her head turning to see the person who had entered and raising her tired eyes upwards as slowly as the rest of her body was moving.

Walsh stared down at her with a strangely satisfied look on her face. "You've been unconscious for almost a whole day, Miss Summers. And yet, you seem to have recovered remarkably well."

"Yeah, well. Can't keep us Slayers down for long," she quipped, her voice low and raspy.

"Yes, of course. You have to be able to heal from almost anything rather rapidly in order to protect the world," Walsh replied, a hint of mocking in her tone as she finished.

A chocked laugh rose in Buffy throat, the sound hitting the air but making her cough almost instantly as her lungs drew in air desperately through the pain of her expanding ribcage. "You... you think... that's a joke... don't you?" Walsh just stared at her impassively. "Do you know how many times I have saved the world?" She asked once she had caught her breath. "Three times. At the moment, anyway."

"And what do you mean by that?"

"I'm not dead yet, am I? So the chance of me having to avert another apocalypse before that happens is pretty high."

"Not if you're in here."

"That's true. But you're in the world, Professor," Buffy replied, using the title sarcastically. "If it gets destroyed, you go bye-bye too."

Walsh ignored her. "If you want us to let you go, you know what you have to do."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Tell you about Spike. Except, you're not just gonna let me go if I do," Buffy voice grew stronger as she spoke. Still moving gingerly, she brought her knees up to her chest and used the wall for support, pressing back against it as she pushed up with her legs. Slowly, she rose to a standing position, leaning against the wall but now able to stare the older woman in the eye. "You're not done with me yet. As you said, I'm a very interesting specimen."

The cold grey eyes watching the blonde allowed some awe to creep in, impressed by Buffy's recovery and continued determinism even after what had been done to her. She shook her head and regained her thoughts. "Yes, you are," she said, regaining her composure and the small strange smile curving her lips again. "But what if I were to say that we'd spotted Hostile Seventeen with a young male approximately twenty minutes ago?"

"Then I'd say you're bluffing. Trying to get me to tell you what you want to know."

"Then you'd be wrong." Walsh's smile grew at the doubt seeping into the green eyes that had dulled over the past two days. "I sent a patrol out to search for a hostile that had been creating a disturbance within the populace. They have been unsuccessful so far, but when the team were returning to base to report their failure to me, they passed a rather distinct bleached blonde before he ran into a park and they lost track of him again." She paused to allow the relief to sink in before dropping her next bombshell. "They picked it up again a little later and they've followed him to a cemetery. Strangely enough, he led us right to the hostile I had originally sent my team out to pick up. It seems he's working with them," she finished smugly.

_Spike's working with demons... No, he can't be, he... _Her eyes dropped as she thought over everything that had happened, trying to pinpoint the place in time she was. Her eyes widened in realisation. _Giles! He's a Feral demon or whatever! And my God, I have gotta do something about Ethan before that pain in my butt causes any more trouble._

"We're bringing them in now." With that final statement, Walsh turned and strode back out of the cell.

_That... can't be true. Can it...?_

* * *

Xander ran, Spike leading slightly as he followed the trail. They had recently come across a hole in the wall of one of the sewers where Spike had said it had probably used for shelter. Or for hiding. Either way, the Fyarl had left that spot and they were rapidly catching up. Eventually, as they continued through another copse of trees, they broke out into the open space of Restfield Cemetery. Spike scanned the area and sprinted off in one direction, leaving a rather baffled Xander to stare at the space where he had been.

"Man, vampire speed is pretty cool sometimes," Xander lamented, letting his inner nerd out to appreciate the supernatural powers of his enemies. The moment over, he ran after the vampire.

He rounded the corner to one of the tombs to see Spike almost doubled over with laughter and a large red demon. Nervously, he backed away as his hand moved to his back pocket to check his stake was still hidden there. He didn't know if it would kill this thing, but he was willing to give it a go if it came down to it. "Err, Spike...? Is this the Feral demon you mentioned?"

* * *

Spike bounded around the corner and grabbed the demon by the shoulders. He pulled it back and spun it, slamming it backward with a painful sounding thud as dust fell down around them from the stone of the mausoleum.

"Spike, wonderful," Giles stated with a sigh. "A perfect end to a perfect day."

Spike's bloodlust vanished and he lowered his fist that had been prepared to smash into the demon's face. "Giles?" He inquired, more confused about this day than he had been so far.

Giles raised his big hands and placed them on Spike's chest, catching the blond off guard and shoving him backwards. "Go on, then. Let's get on with the fighting," he raised shocked eyes as he realised what Spike had said. He lowered his arms and stared. "You understand me?"

"Of course I understand you," Spike replied dumbly.

"I'm speaking English? Because when I tried to talk to a woman earlier she just... screamed at me," he finished dismally.

Spike shook his head, a grin beginning to form. "No, you're speaking Fyarl. I happen to speak Fyarl. And, by the way, why the hell are you suddenly a Fyarl demon? You just come over all demon-y this morning?" He pulled his cigarettes out, quickly lighting one. A slight pause was all that indicated him piecing together the information he had. "The other git, whoever it was in your place. He cast a spell on you, di'n't 'e?"

"As a matter of fact, yes, he did. Ethan Rayne. We have to find him. He must undo this and then he needs a... good being killed."

Spike couldn't hold back any longer. The cigarette fell forgotten to the floor as he erupted into a fit of laughter. "Oh this is bloody hilarious... a Fyarl demon... talkin' in the Queen's English. Go on, say somethin' else. Say 'serviceable', or some rot."

The hard glare Giles sent his way didn't help matters, only increasing his amusement. Just at that moment, Xander rounded the corner.

* * *

"Err, Spike...? Is this the Feral demon you mentioned?"

Spike paused and took an uneeded breath. He looked at Xander and back at the demon before bursting into giggles again. The demon started making grunting and growling noises, making Xander's eyes widen as he backed off a few more steps. Finally managing to get himself under control, Spike held a hand up to Xander, who stopped retreating but kept his eyes locked on the red demon.

Spike cleared his throat. "It's Fyarl. And it's Giles," he explained simply, a grin on his face as he fought down another round of laughing.

"Oh, of course," Xander replied. He paused, then threw his arms up into the air. "What do you mean 'it's Giles'?" He asked loudly, disbelieving that the large horned monster in front of him was the English ex-librarian that had been like a father to him.

"Sounds like his ol' buddy Ethan cast a spell on 'im. Turned him all demon like."

"Ethan? Ethan Rayne?"

The demon turned towards him and seemed to nod its head. Xander looked to Spike, who nodded too in confirmation. He turned back to the Fyarl, eyeing him warily. "Giles?" He approached him cautiously. He came to within arm's reach but then stopped, not relaxing at all. Nothing about this creature reminded him of his friend. He just had Spike's word and the apparent fact that he wasn't being attacked to go on. "So... how do we turn him back?" He directed his question to Spike.

"'E says we gotta find Ethan Rayne." Spike answered, jabbing his thumb in the direction of Giles. A series of strange gargling and muffled groans followed and Spike turned to the Giles Demon. "I just am, alrigh'?" He replied angrily, covering whatever his true feelings were towards whatever had been said. "Now, c'mon. Let's go."

With that, the unlikely trio walked towards the exit, unaware of the soldiers that had been watching them ever since they entered the cemetery.

* * *

"How come you can speak Fyarl?" Xander asked curiously after a moment. Spike froze, almost causing Xander to bump into him. "Jeez, Spike. A little bit of warning would be nice."

"Shut up, Whelp!" Spike hissed at him, his eyes steely. But the brief eye contact was enough for Xander.

"Commandos," he stated worriedly.

"They're after me, but now they've see Giles they'll wan' 'im too. Harris, you gotta get out of 'ere. I'll distract 'em, get 'em t' go after me. You two find Ethan and get this thing done, then find the witches. Plan'll have to change a bit, but if you include Ripper it should work anyway," he explained hurriedly.

"Wait, Spike. Why are you doing this?" The brunette asked. The growls that came from Giles reiterated the question.

Spike sighed in frustration. "Jus' think about it this way: 've already been down there. I can take whatever they do t' me. Migh' even be able to find the Slayer. Nothin' good'll come out of Giles gettin' caught," They looked at him, unconvinced. He glared at them and vamped, then spun back to face the direction they'd just come from and roared as loud as he could. Looking back over his shoulder, he yelled back to them, "Go, now!"

"I know you're there!" Spike continued to shout. "So why don' you jus' show yourselves?"

Five soldiers edged out of the cover of the trees, all guns aimed at Spike. "What about the other hostile?" One asked quietly, Spike only just catching the words on the breeze.

"We leave it. Seventeen is our priority," came the order from their leader. A voice that Spike recognised but couldn't put a name to.

"Yeah, tha's righ'! Come 'n' get me lads," Spike taunted, listening to the footsteps of Xander and Giles as they ran to safety. Now they were out of the way, the fear for himself began to tickle at the edge of his consciousness. He shrugged it off, using the bravado he'd perfected over a century.

The leader approached him bit by bit, not making any sudden movements. "Try to run and we'll shoot you. Try to hurt us and we'll shoot you. Make any attempts to escape and – "

"Le' me guess, you shoot me?" Spike mocked, sneering at the human in front of him. He was bigger than Spike, but no match if it weren't for the vampire's handicap.

"Maybe you're not so dumb after all," the masked man retorted, a sneer of his own in his voice.

One of the other soldiers decided to use the leader as a distraction, hoping to catch Spike by surprise. The blond dodged the wave of electricity and used it to bring himself close enough to the leader to grab him and spin him around. He pinned the commando to his chest, holding him tightly so he couldn't move but not enough to cause pain.

"Anyone else wan' a go?" He jeered, grinning at the small group that suddenly seemed a lot less unsure of themselves.

One from the left charged forwards. Spike flung his captive to the side, parrying the punch aimed for his head and grabbing the soldier by the throat. Without thinking, his other hand came up to grip the side of the man's head. As he was about to twist, something tackled him from behind. The leader fell on top of him, the weight of the man forcing the air from Spike's lungs. He bucked, knocking the man from off of him and rolling to the side. He flipped to his feet in a defensive stance, ready for the third soldier. He ducked a punch from the third and jumped over a kick from the second. They both raised their fists and punched simultaneously, their fists crashing into each other's faces when Spike dodged out of the way again.

Spike laughed, thoroughly enjoying the fight once again. He secretly thanked the soldier for tackling when he had. He'd lost his head, letting the bloodlust consume him as usual. He had to stay controlled. Sure, he couldn't hurt anyone, but he could still have some fun.

"Is that the best you got?" He scoffed. "'Ve seen fledges with better skill!"

The leader had picked himself up and stood in front of him. He began circling Spike, looking for any kind of weakness now that he'd lost his gun. He didn't know where the other two were, but didn't really care. He wanted to be able to say he was personally responsible for bringing in Seventeen.

"What, you really wan' to lose to me again?"

Without a word, the soldier attacked. He was faster this time, more determined. He'd finally experienced what he was up against and knew he was the better fighter. Spike was ready to prove him wrong. They traded blows, Spike never landing any but preventing him from doing so either. After just a few minutes though, Spike got bored. _Bugger this_. Bracing himself for the pain, he lashed out in one strong punch that landed right on the leader's nose. He relished the breaking of bone and flesh under his knuckles before the world around him exploded into white. He fell to the ground screaming and clutching his head, as the leader hit at the same, now unconscious like his other two buddies.

Spike rode out the wave after wave of blinding pain, waiting for it to stop. When it did, he blinked a few times to focus and wiped the moisture from his eyes. Glaring at the soldiers, he stood proud and strong. "And that's what you get for messin' with the Big Bad," he growled, his eyes flashing gold.

He went rigid, a familiar pain searing through him and he yelled out as he collapsed. Two more of the soldiers came into his line of vision, one holding a stun gun pointing at him. The other stood further away, hanging back like he didn't want to be involved.

That was the last thing he saw before the blackness enveloped him.

* * *

Buffy was once again woken by the sound of a door opening. She opened her eyes, blinking against the harsh lights of the compound. She climbed to her feet tiredly and stared out through the still closed glass front to her cell and across the corridor to the one opposite. The sight that met her shocked her beyond speech.

Two masked soldiers were dragging a figure into the cell, a figure wearing a black leather duster that she would recognise anywhere. If she closed her eyes and concentrated she could still smell the leather, cigarettes and alcohol. She could feel the cool smoothness of it against her skin, remembered the touch of the worn but supple material under her fingers. And just as she knew every contour of that coat, she knew every line to the owner's body. And she knew then that Walsh hadn't been bluffing. They'd captured Spike. Her attempts to keep him safe from them and out of their clutches had failed.

She watched helplessly as the dropped him unceremoniously in the centre of the white cell and left. One stopped before leaving and kicked him hard in the ribs, causing Buffy to gasp at the resounding crack and Spike to groan in pain even in his unconscious state.

"That's for the broken nose," she heard him say. Her anger rose toward the soldier, but felt the pride build as well at the thought that Spike had obviously gotten a few choice kicks in before he'd gone down. Then recognition set in, and the anger returned full force.

"Leave him alone, Riley," she warned, her voice deadly hard.

"Or what? You'll stop me from inside your high containment cell?" He ridiculed, removing his mask. The other soldier took it from him and took the cue to leave, walking hurriedly away from the scene.

To make his point, Riley walked in and shook Spike violently. He stirred but didn't awaken. Buffy smashed her fists against the glass, feeling the crippling jolt of electricity flow through her and making her take a step back. Riley shook him again, and this time Spike came to. When he saw the blue eyes flicker open, Riley threw him down again.

"Get up," he ordered.

Spike rolled onto his side, his ribs creaking in protest. He gritted his teeth and wrapped an arm around them to try and support them. With extreme effort, he pulled himself up to his feet. He swayed slightly, but stayed upright.

"Wha' d' you wan', Soldier Boy?" He slurred, but still containing the mocking tone that infuriated almost everyone it was directed at.

"Just one thing," Riley said casually. In a move faster that neither Slayer nor vampire thought he could accomplish, Riley brought his arm back and let fly. His fist smashed into Spike's nose, the crunch echoing loudly in the cell.

Spike had no chance of blocking it, even in the split second he saw it coming. He didn't have the energy to stop it. So instead, he let it happen. The power of the punch snapped his head back, the force carrying him backwards and causing him to lose his balance. He stumbled and fell, landing badly and crying out as his ribs screamed.

Buffy slammed her fists against the glass again, shaking off the punishment and standing firm. "Stop it! Leave him alone!" Again and again, her tiny but powerful hands beat against the glass of her cell. Her rage grew and she stepped back. She tried a roundhouse kick to the centre of the glass. Once. Twice. But to no effect.

She paused only when she heard his voice. "Stop, luv. You're not gettin' out tha' way," he called to her, his voice a little shaky and holding defeat. Something that scared her more than anything had so far. She looked to him, lying on the floor of his cell. His knees were pulled up slightly as if he were about to try and stand, one arm was wrapped around his abdomen again and his eyes were on the ground. She hated not being able to see his eyes. Those expressive sapphire orbs could tell her all she needed to know.

Riley turned and glared at Buffy as he stepped out of Spike's cell. "Looks like you're boyfriend's given up, Blondie. Maybe you should take his advice," he said nastily, closing and locking the door behind him. Staring at the girl he had a crush on such a short time ago, his gaze hardened and turned to go on his way.

Buffy's eyes never left Spike as he struggled to pull himself into a sitting position against the wall that mirrored her own earlier. "Spike?" She called out hesitantly, moving as close to the glass as she dared.

It started quietly, so much so that Buffy wasn't sure she was hearing what she thought she was at first. But gradually the giggles got louder, the sound increasing her fear at the slightly mad hint they had. "Spike?" She called again, her voice louder.

The giggles ceased abruptly and he hung his head. Shaking it slightly, he said, "Sorry, pet. 'S just been a weird day. Tryin' t' rescue you, helpin' the Whelp, Giles turned into a demon and lettin' these nancy boy commandos get me jus' so they could get away," he paused, adding quietly, "Hopin' I could find you."

Buffy's expression was completely blank as she absorbed all of the information he'd just sent her way. But as much as she tried to focus on everything he's told her, her brain was focused on one thing. "You hoped you'd find me? You've been planning to... try and rescue me?"

Her voice held restrained hope and the old urge to crush it rose up, but he couldn't find it within himself do it. Not now, not when hope was one of the most important things you could have in a place like this. Technically, all she'd done was repeat what he'd said. Not to mention that it was surprisingly easy for him to suppress the spiteful barb ready on his tongue. He found he didn't want to. So he nodded, keeping his eyes down and missing the love and awe that filled the green eyes watching him with the glitter of unshed tears.

She blinked them back, telling herself she was being stupid. He didn't care about her. Not yet, anyway. "So... what's the plan now?" She asked.

Spike's head snapped up at the sound of approaching footsteps. He raised his eyes and watched as the group came towards their cells, and without moving his gaze from them, directed his suggestion to Buffy. "We wait."

* * *

Willow and Tara jumped as the door of the redhead's dormitory slammed open. Their eyes widened further when Xander came barrelling in followed by a large red demon. Tara gasped in shock, and Willow backed up and raised her arms, spell on her lips as she gaped at her friend.

Before she could say anything, Xander inhaled deeply to catch his breath and spoke up. "Spike's in trouble."

* * *

A/N: And that's all for now folks! Thank you for reading and please please review to let me know what you thought =)


	17. Author's Note

A/N: Thank you so much to all those that are following this story and having the patience to stick with me on the fic. I apologise for my poor updating ability, but unfortunately RL has been dealing me a lot of bad stuff at the moment. I'd been told your first year of maths at uni is just like redoing your A Levels. Not so much. There's been so much coursework and tests and everything else in RL that I've been so stressed out, and then when I try to relax myself by doing what I love and write, everything that's bothering me stops my ideas from coming out to play. So I am truly sorry for the lack of updates and for this essay of an author's note. I can only hope that you will continue to be the reader's I love that have supported me thus far and left me such great comments =)

The good news is that in just 4 weeks (ish) I'll be taking all my exams, so in about 5 I'll be home free and hopefully able to relax enough and destress to the point where I can write again =) I know even me personally is now looking forward to an update lol.

So until then, my greatest thanks and apologies, and I hope to return in the very near future.

Jay out.

(For now...)


	18. Turning Back and Being Trapped

HUGE thanks to Seapea, angelloverkk, bookchick81, cp-Cameron Phillips, Magemaster, Fluffy's Wrath, soulcop83, WolfChild65, Myrna13, Rebel2020, bexyally, Salor Sayuri, KK1987, WingedGirl4Life, Spike's Son, iamdk, dmarie1273, Insert Witty Name Here, darkbangle, RedheadObsession, PadfootObsessed329, Speed Girl 87, and Spygrrl for their wonderfulwonderful reveiws! Wow, it wasn't until I wrote this note that I realised how many reviews I'd actually had! Over 120 now =D

I mainly just wanted to say thank you to everyone reading this for being so patient, and apologies for taking so long to update. But I can't believe how supportive everyone's been and I really think that all the luck sent my way helped seeing as I think I did rather well in my exams =D =D

Also, an extra note to WolfChild65 in thanks for your message. It really helped =)

Okay, I'll stop babbling on now. Though my plan was to attempt to get the story finished and all posted up at once as a thank you gift, it once again didn't quite work out that way. However, I have a lot of ideas scribbled down, they just need to get into full form on Word so with any luck I shall be able to get my butt into gear and post more often than I have recently =)

So without further ado, chapter 17.

* * *

Turning Back and Being Trapped

"What do you mean Spike's in trouble?" Willow asked, her focus on her friend even as her eyes continuously sent nervous glances at the demon behind him. "And did you know there's a demon following you?" She whispered frantically.

Xander looked back at Giles and began his attempt at explaining. He paced back and forth, his arms flailing in his exuberant gestures. "We went to Giles', but he was gone and Spike said he could smell a demon, so we tracked it. We found a Fyarl demon, who Spike said was Giles cos Ethan cast a spell or something. Thing is, when we found Giles, the Initiative was about. Spike told us to run and find Ethan to get the spell undone, and distracted the commandos. He didn't follow us so I'm guessing he got caught. So, Spike's in trouble," he rambled, not allowing time for any questions.

Willow blinked hard, a confused look on her face. Tara looked blank as she tried to follow what was happening and meld it with the new information Willow had recently given her.

"So.. that's Giles?" Willow's tone expressed all the doubt she felt. She turned wary eyes to the red demon. She glanced back at Xander to see his nod of agreement, but she still couldn't quite fit the image before her to her mentor. Her eyes suddenly widened. "But if that's true, and Spike's been captured, what about the plan?" She asked worriedly, her thoughts returning to Buffy being held captive by the soldiers.

"He said we should find Ethan and include Giles in our little scheme. He thinks it'll still work," the brunette answered.

"I-I could do a locator spell, i-if you have something of h-his," Tara spoke up hesitantly.

A serious of angry snarls erupted from the demon as it threw its large hands up into the air. Everyone stepped back at the abrupt movement.

"I think that's a negative on the having something of his childhood friend turned enemy front," Xander quipped nervously.

"Oh," Tara sighed, ducking her head in embarrassment.

"It was a good idea though," Willow said, smiling brightly at her. Tara returned it shyly and seemed to gain some of her confidence back.

"Not meaning to be rude here or anything, Wills, but who's she?" Xander asked, sending an apologetic but still curious look to Tara.

"Oh, Tara, this is one of my best friends, Xander. Behind him is Giles, he's really really smart. He's Buffy's Watcher. Guys, this is Tara," The redhead moved closer to the other woman and grinned giddily, bouncing on her heels slightly. "She's a witch too."

"Ah, the friend you said you might be able to help us. So, is she an official member of this rescue party?"

Willow looked to Tara, and smiled at the nod she received before turning back to face Xander, nodding too. "Yep."

Xander smiled warmly at the shy witch and raised a hand in greeting. "Hi, Tara. Pleased to meet you. I'm Xander."

Tara couldn't help but smile back and nodded to him as her hand rose to briefly return the wave, glad to have been so readily accepted into this small group.

"S-so, umm, what do we do?" She asked quietly.

"First step: Help Giles," Willow stated, moving towards her desk.

"And how are we gonna do that, Wills? I mean, unless you can speak Fyarl then what can you do?"

Willow frowned at Xander as she opened her laptop. "Hey, I may be college girl and magic girl, but I'm still computer girl too, you know." The scowl lifted as she sat down and loaded up a page. She typed quickly, her intense stare not leaving the screen in front of her. "I'm just gonna do a quick search for anyone checked into a hotel in Sunnydale under the name Ethan Rayne," she paused and glanced up with a doubtful look on her face. "Unless of course he's checked in under an alias, but hopefully he won't be." She shrugged and turned back to the screen.

"Great! Well, while Willow works her mad skills on the laptop over there, what do we do?" Xander asked.

Giles suggested something, but two sets of eyes stared at him incomprehensibly. Xander turned to Tara. "I don't suppose you got that, did you?"

"N-no, sorry. I c-could maybe try a spell that l-let's you understand any l-language, but umm, it's only m-meant for human languages, so I'm not sure it would work."

Xander shrugged. "Couldn't make us understand him any less," he quipped with a grin at the shyer girl. Tara returned it with a small smile and went over to a pile of books sat on the desk.

Her soft voice chanted clearly, if quietly, and a soft white mist drifted to hover over everyone's heads. As the last word was spoken, the smoke disappeared in a flash of bright light.

"Does the worked have?" Everyone stared at Giles as his gruff and gravelly voice filled the room.

"Does the worked have?" Xander repeated, looking at Tara in confusion.

"Well, I s-said it was only for human l-languages," she said apologetically, dropping her head.

"At least we can understand him now," Willow added optimistically, ignoring her computer.

"Ah, yes. Now only no demon to be and would be my day complete," Giles grumbled sarcastically.

The redhead frowned at him and tried to make sense of what he'd said. "Well, sorta."

"So, Giles. Don't suppose your buddy let on where he's staying here in Sunnydale?" Xander asked, desperate to have all his friends back and everything back to normal. Or, as normal as things were for him nowadays.

"I believe that he me told that he at the Sunnydale Motor Inn remains. He complained constant over the rat at a point."

"Right," Xander dragged out before smacking his hands together. "Okay, Sunnydale Motor Inn. Let's go scare us up a chaos worshipper," he added cheerfully just as the computer beeped.

"Oh hey, I got a hit!" She exclaimed excitedly before remembering the information Giles had now managed to give them. "Ethan Rayne, Sunnydale Motor Inn," she said, getting more disgruntled as she spoke. "Whole lot of good that does now," she scowled, frowning at the computer.

"Don't worry, Wills. You found him so that still counts for something! We never doubt that you're computer-college-magic girl," Xander reassured her as she stood from her place at the desk and turned to face the small group. She offered him a smile before returning to the matter at hand.

"So, what do we do?"

* * *

Ethan jumped backwards from the door as it burst open, startled eyes wide. They grew even bigger as a large red figure burst through the frame and approached him.

"Now, now, Giles. Don't want to do anything rash, would you?" He asked nervously, darting to the far side of the room. But Giles kept coming.

Catching an opening, Ethan tried to escape. He was quicker than the lumbering for Giles now inhabited, so he was able to get around him. But Giles sent a punch his way at the same time, glancing a blow to his shoulder. Ethan stumbled, off balance but still determined to make it to the door. He could see his freedom in the darkness of the night just through the open door. Just as he reached it, he found his escape obstructed by a bulky figure.

"And where d'ya think you're going?" Xander asked in fake cheery tone. He face hardened as he grabbed Ethan by his upper arms and forced him back into the room and pushed him to sit on the bed. "Girls?"

Summoned by his voice, Willow and Tara took their cue. They entered chanting, thick golden ropes wrapping themselves around Ethan's body and tightening, immobilising him. He began to struggle when he realised the powers of those that had become involved. He could feel the power radiating off them, but it wasn't just light. The blonde girl's power was pure, good. But the redhead... The redhead had serious potential to cause some real chaos. And it scared him.

She wasn't sure why, but Willow had seen fear creep into the man's eyes as she and Tara wove the spell that kept him bound. Keeping her hand in her friend's, she turned steely eyes to him and locked his gaze.

"Turn Giles back," she commanded, her tone holding just a hint of the power she wielded. It was strong and merciless.

His voice wavered but Ethan tried to regain some of his control of the situation. Or to at least keep the image of himself that he had created going. He didn't want these children to know they instilled anything but annoyance in him. "And why exactly would I do that? You didn't even say 'please'," he replied with a weaker version of his usual smirk.

"Turn Giles back," she repeated, giving him a sarcastic smile. "Please."

"What are you going to do if I don't? You won't hurt me," he retorted bravely.

Willow clasped Tara's hand a little tighter and raised her other hand. She clenched her fist, leaving just her index finger pointing upwards. Then she slowly began to draw circles in the air with her finger, rotating her wrist slightly too.

Slowly, the rope that held him began to wrap further around him. Tighter and tighter, they began cutting off the circulation to his arms and legs. He glanced down and the writhing gold snakes that stopped him from moving. His limbs were beginning to tingle with the lack of blood circulating, but he had to call her bluff. She wouldn't really hurt him. Would she?

"Alright, alright!" He shouted. He still wanted to get out of this alive.

Willow stopped and lowered her hand, letting out the breath she'd been holding in concentration. She'd never have been able to hurt him, so she hadn't been able to tighten the ropes that much. She just had to make him believe she would, so she'd had to do it as slow as she could, to make him nervous and then a believer. And it had worked like a charm.

"You'll undo whatever it was that you did?"

"Yes."

"And you won't try to escape again?"

"No."

Willow stared hard at him for what seemed like an age. Finally, she said, "Okay," and released Tara's hand. With the motion, the ropes dissipated into thin air.

Ethan rubbed his arms and legs to get the feeling back into them. He scowled at Willow, but when she raised a questioning eyebrow he began scurrying around the room to gather what he needed.

Several candles and another statue head later, and Giles was back to his normal self.

"Good God, my eyes! It burns!" Yelled Xander, slapping his hands over them as Willow and Tara squeaked and covered theirs too.

Taking advantage of the situation, Ethan ran for it. He punched Xander out of the way from where he was guarding the door and sprinted for his car. But before he could make it, electricity coursed through his body. The last thing he saw before he lost consciousness were the masked faces of soldiers.

* * *

Back in the motel room, Giles glanced down. Face reddening, his hands flew downwards and he began stuttering, trying to find something to say.

Xander stood back up from where he'd fallen on the bed, and making sure he kept his eye averted from the other man, he made his way to the closet. He pulled out some of Ethan's clothes and threw them in the rough direction Giles was in.

"I-I-I, umm, th-this – "

"Just get dressed, man!" Xander shouted in desperation, still not prepared to turn around. The girls had also turned so they were facing the opposite direction, eyes away but small grins on their faces as they held down giggles. And Xander couldn't help but feel a laugh rise in his chest and had to fight it down. Only in Sunnydale.

With Giles dressed again, and looking rather like a bookish short haired George Michael, the group left the motel in silence, no one really sure what to say.

Other than Giles it seemed. "Why would he do that?"

It surprised everyone when Xander answered, not having to ask who. "I don't know. I wanna say there's something else, some other evil motive, but..." He trailed off and shrugged, staring uncomfortably down at the floor.

His gaze snapped up when a thought came into his head. "Buffy!" He exclaimed. At their puzzled looks he continued. "If he gets taken back in, he can find Buffy and kill her without any of us there to protect her!" He received three harsh frowns in response.

"I highly doubt that. She doesn't need us protecting her, I've trained her well enough. Besides, it wouldn't be the first time she went up against Spike," Giles reasoned, leaving out the part where he knew more than the others concerning the future.

"And he's got that chip. He couldn't hurt her even if he wanted to," added Willow.

Then Tara spoke up unexpectedly, her soft voice soothing in the night. "He went back into a place that, by the sounds of it, treated him no better than an animal. I'd bet animals get treated better. And he did that to save you and Giles. To give you a chance to get away so you could help Buffy. Doesn't that show you he's something other than just evil?" She finished with a small smile, encouraging and supportive eyes on his.

They all stared at her in shock. Xander dropped his eyes from hers in shame, but raised them again when she laid a gentle hand on his arm. She smiled in understanding and stepped back.

"You're right. I just can't think of why else he'd do that."

Giles paused in his step, seemingly lost in his thoughts. "To help," he stated simply. "He's coming around sooner than he did before, that's all that's happening," he muttered to himself under his breath.

"You okay there, G-Man?"

"What? Oh, yes," he said, not even noticing the annoying moniker. Refocused, he addressed the group. "We must get into the Initiative. We need to find them, and we need to rescue them. Spike as well as Buffy." No one argued the point. "Now, tell me all about this plan of yours. We do it tonight."

* * *

Buffy blinked hard as her lids fluttered open. She would never get used to the harsh lights and sterile white walls of the place where she was being kept. But she had adjusted fairly quickly. She just hoped her friends would hurry.

She lifted her head, closing her eyes against the brightness around her as she levered herself into an upright position. On arm was stretched behind her to support her weight and allowing her to recline a little, and her other hand rose to her head, massaging her temple to hopefully help relieve the headache beginning to build.

Braving the light, she opened her eyes a slither. They snapped closed again as her eyes were assaulted and her head exploded in pain. A breath hissed inwards and she shielded her face, lowering her arm again only when she felt the pain ease into a dull ache, finally receding altogether. She squinted into the space around her, her sense of sight slowly returning to her. It didn't take long for her to realise she wasn't where she had thought she was. Broken memories swirled in the fog of her mind, but one rose to the fore. The pale yellow gas being pumped into her cell from the ceiling, then the darkness that claimed her. She frowned in confusion and shook her head as she tried to sort her thoughts. She stretched her arms in front of her and rotated her head. Turning her head to the side to stretch her neck, it was then she realised she wasn't alone.

Everything else ceased to matter in that second. Her eyes widened and she spun herself around. As quickly as she could, she scrambled towards the other prone form. She grabbed his shoulder and flipped him over so he faced upwards, sliding an arm underneath his back and lifting him up slightly so she was cradling his head. With her free hand she stroked the side of his face, her eyes frantically scanning his body for injuries. Other than he few bruises he'd suffered at the hands of his captors and the visit from Riley, he seemed unharmed.

_C'mon, wake up. Come back to me._

As if he had heard his thoughts, his head moved a little and his jaw twitched. Dark lashes wavered against pale cheeks, eyes moved beneath their lids, and she prayed that much harder.

"Spike, can you hear me?"

A low moan sounded from his chest, which gradually slurred into speech. "Yeah, pet. I hear you." Deep blue was slowly revealed to her eager emerald when his eyes flickered open.

Her face lit up and her eyes sparkled with happiness. Her lips curved into a wide smile that rivalled any she'd ever worn before, past, present or future. "Hi," she whispered, her hand stilling on his face where it stopped to lie flat on his cheek.

Spike was stunned. He could still feel his demon calling for the death of the girl holding him so closely, but it was quieter. And he could easily ignore it, especially given his current circumstances. He still felt uncomfortable under the Slayer's stare, but no one had ever looked at him like that. Like they loved him, completely and unconditionally. He couldn't look away. All he could do was return her weak greeting. "Hey."

Awkwardness began to tinge the edges of his perception as she continued to stare at him with soft eyes. He sat up with a groan, breaking her hold so she just sat on her knees next to him. "What's going on?"

"Your guess is as good as mine." She replied, her gaze lifting to sweep the room.

His followed hers as they scanned for any clues as to why they had been moved here. After a moment, a panel in the wall slid to one side in answer to their question. Behind it was a chain link fence that was flush against the floor, ceiling and walls of the recess. Between the metal links three sets of eyes stared outwards at them. Professor Walsh, a man in a scientist's laboratory coat and Riley Finn watched them intently.

"This is your test run." Maggie stated, the nature of her plan obvious in her smug tone but hidden behind her smile.

* * *

I know that the spell Tara cast made Willow on the computer kinda redundant, but I came up with the idea cos I noticed how if you put a sentence into a translator on the internet, translate it into a language and then back into English, you don't always get what you put in. Sometimes the results can be so funny, so figured I'd have a go here. I wrote Giles' speech out, translated it into Dutch (cos why can't a demon speak Dutch xD) and then back into English. What you read is what I got out!

So yeah, anyways. I am also working on ANL in parallel, but will work on getting as many chapters done as possible. I may stick with my original idea and spend the next month writing whenever I'm free and with any luck get both my stories finished and then get the rest of the chapters up for you guys to read =)

Thanks again for everything I've already said and more, and now for taking the time to keep reading this! So click that button below and drop me a line to tell me your thoughts =)


	19. Chapter 19

Author's Note

Hey there everybody! I just want to say thank you so much to everyone that's been reading my stories and keeping up with them. However it's come to my attention that having not updated in at least a year that I'm really not giving the time to them that they need and you deserve. Unfortunately real life came knocking like a wrecking ball and really hasn't let up since, which has meant that ideas are very thin on the ground and effort is even more so, and the stress has meant that writing is just not the relaxing pastime it used to be. I still love reading though, and escaping for a short time into the world of BtVS and seeing the vast stories that other people come up with. I promise that I will endeavour to continue when I can but it does mean that, for now, I will have to consider this piece abandoned. I will continue with it when I have the time and post it when it's completed though. I can't guarantee when this will happen, and I wouldn't blame you if you didn't, but I really hope that everyone who's gotten to this point will stick with me!

Thank you and I really do hope to post again soon! Maybe the Starfury Vampire Ball will give me the boost of inspiration I've been looking for.

Until next time.

Jay


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